The King of the Skies has returned…
Five ordinary children find out they’re not so ordinary after all. Saralia, Ember, Regal, Relina, and Shaun have their fates thrown all out of order when they meet Dawn Wing the black griffin; descendant of Ana leader of her kind. Dawn Wing chooses them to help fight Latebros and his Night Slash soldiers. Latebros a powerful descendant of Occultus, wishes to use the griffins’ power as his ancestor had.
He wishes to control them not only that but to have power over the world. His strengths are already stronger than any military. If he is able to get his wishes the world will be brought down. What can five weak orphans do against a power hungry demon-man? More than you think…
Flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing….
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,006 Literary Works • 672,809 Reviews
Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm Knight Hardy here on a mission to ensure that all works on YWS has at least two reviews. You will probably never see this but....Imma do this anyway.
Anyway let's get right to it,
Hmm, well this is a pretty nice looking summary/ blurb here...there's a lovely sense of mystery and excitement being created here right in this paragraph of things. You've used enough somewhat well known fantasy creatures and a twist from your own world here to make something that sounds like it will make for an exciting read, and this appears to be some sort of battle of good vs evil, where we've got kids having to battle this evil gang with the help of some sort of might creature of old...definitely a formula I've run into before, but also an effective and it looks like you've got a healthy amount of unique features in here at any rate.
Hmm..alright, so that looks our generic evil overload fellow that wants to harness this ancient beings of power to control the world and whatnot..not the most unique there...but I suppose that's just par for the course in this genre..so this uniqueness from the griffins can balance things out if done well.
Also I love that last line...that feels like it should be some kind of inspirational quote right there...I do love that ending. Overall, sounds like this could be an exciting story, and that I'd certainly read here.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry