• Home

Young Writers Society

16+ Language Violence

The Forsaken Race - The Hidden Truth: Chapter 28

by RavenAkuma

Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language and violence.

Chapter 28 - Planning Ahead



Kita couldn't remember passing out, but now she found herself lying on the ground. A very bitter and cold smell had filled her nose before disappearing. Her head had a mild ache as she creaked open one eye. From that, she was stunned to hear a reply.

"Oh, she's waking up!"

Kita squinted to see, recognizing the pale figure sitting next to her. It was Seyber, with an open glass bottle in her hand. The cloudy white content looked somewhere between powder and liquid, with floral and leafy bits mixed in.

Surprisingly, another person stepped inside, in response to her exclamation. It was Zin, who looked as Kita remembered. His pale blue eyes were the same exact shade as Seyber's, now that she could directly compare them, and his very dark blue hair was a fluffy mess like usual. He still wore dark gray knee-length pants, a grayish-purple shirt with a yellow sleeve stitched on, and an ice-blue banner hanging from his belt with the Zyrean emblem in a darker blue shade.

Kita felt neutral toward Zin. She had to interact with him more than a few times, as his magic was her best and easiest access to fresh water. He was never genuinely rude, though he did have a mischievous streak and frequently teased her. Most of the time, it was just for lighthearted fun, even though Kita struggled to recognize it as such.

Appropriately, Zin remarked, "I thought half the reason she came to us was that she couldn't sleep, now we have to go out of our way to wake her up!"

"Zin, hush," Seyber replied, extending an empty jar. "Put some fresh water in here, please."

"Okay, okay..." Zin took the jar. "Because apparently, I'm just a fancy water dispenser."

Despite her smirk, Seyber rolled her eyes at that. As Zin moved his finger in a spiraling pattern, a tiny spot of dark blue light manifested before water particles began to collect and grow, following the pattern in a tiny torrent. Once enough was formed, he pointed to the jar, causing the water to spiral and collect inside.

Though Kita would normally enjoy watching the trick, fascinated by the magic, she was too distracted.

Seyber took the jar. "Here, Kita, sit up slowly and drink some water."

Still barely paying attention, Kita sighed as she pushed herself up. She accepted the water, but only pretended to drink any. A nervous feeling was blocking her throat, and she knew swallowing would be too hard.

"I was afraid that might've actually hurt you," said Seyber. "I can't tell how you mortals function very well..." She sighed, "I'm sorry, I should've figured that you weren't ready to hear that stuff. Even the diluted version."

"Sheesh, what were you talking about?" Asked Zin.

Desperate to dodge the subject, Kita pointed to the bottle. "What's that?"

"Oh?" Seyber held up the bottle. "This is just a stimulant powder. For when someone's rendered unconscious."

"It'd be nicer if it didn't feel like inhaling the spirit of bitterness itself," Zin muttered.

"I've never heard of anything like that, and I worked in the field..." Kita eyed the bottle. "You must be pretty good with potions."

"Thanks!" Seyber remarked. "I do mix a fair amount of them, but Thundur's still the primary brewer around here. She can make these advanced tonics, she's well-versed in medicine and healing, and she's a spirit-walker on top of it; everything from seances to slaying corrupt gods. She really is incredible."

Kita couldn't help smiling a bit. Even though Seyber was still a bit offputting, with the fangs in her smile, there was something adorable about seeing her talk so fondly of her mentor.

Seyber tapped the bottle. "Before you ask, by the way, I already looked for a sleep aid to try and help you. All we currently have is the powder that Thundur made to try and make Leiytning rest, but that stuff's a little too potent by normal standards. Jem unknowingly swiped a bit off the table, rubbed her eyes, and the poor thing almost passed out immediately."

"Fun to prank with," Zin remarked.

Seyber's eyes narrowed. "What?"

Zin laughed nervously, "In theory! Only in theory..."

Kita thought about asking for that powder anyway, the sound of a deep sleep very appealing, but then remembered the last medications she had taken. Whether it was nausea or a terrifying nightmare, she couldn't help shuddering at the risks of trying that route again.

"Well..." Kita awkwardly spoke, "Thanks for the help. I don't know why you'd bother, but I appreciate it, I guess."

"Friends help each other," Seyber replied. "It's not that complicated."

Kita looked confused. "You consider us friends?"

Seyber shrugged her shoulders. "Just because we have a lot of rules, it doesn't mean we can't be. Frankly, I think you deserve some better treatment, with how respectful you've been toward us. Zin?"

"There she goes again, befriending the hirees," Zin remarked.

"Hey," Seyber said defensively.

Zin shrugged his shoulders. "I don't like how chummy you are about it, but she doesn't bother me. I guess I can put her in the broader realm of that word..." He winked. "But I still expect to be referred to as 'Lord Zin the Almighty, Handsome, and Way-Tougher-Than-Leiyt.'"

Seyber looked unamused. "Okay, you can leave now."

Zin started poking her. "Am I bothering you?"

Seyber shoved him back. "Go!"

"Fine..." Zin spun toward the door. "Lord Zin desists!"

Seyber rolled her eyes. "Anyway-"

"Lord Zin opens the door!" Zin exclaimed.

"Zin, stop narrating yourself and get out of here!" Seyber yelled, throwing the sealed stimulant bottle at him. Zin finally ran off toward the fortress, snickering to himself.

Kita managed a genuine laugh, from the sheer ridiculousness. Even Seyber was failing to hide her grin and chuckle.

"Idiot..." Seyber stood up and brushed out her dress. "I recommend you rest for a while. If you need something, don't be afraid to ask. Alright?"

Kita just nodded. It felt unusual to have someone take care of her out of sheer kindness. At the same time, it caused a warm sensation that tugged at her heart. Almost pushing her to accept it and stay open, instead of pushing it away like she normally would.

Once Kita heard the door close, and the sound of footsteps faded completely, she knew she was finally alone. Except for Stud, who was still cowering in the corner. Even so, Kita remained silent and frozen. The only dialogue was her own thoughts.

One thing stood at the forefront of it all. Everything Seyber had told her. A seed of doubt had already been planted, and now she could feel it growing to immeasurable lengths.

"If she's right..." Kita shook her head. "It's shocking. The damage that would've been done, and how it's so different from what I already heard. It's not the matter itself that's so crucial to me; it is ancient history, and Corelia and Leiytning have clearly taken this fight to a personal level. However, why would Corelia completely leave something like that out of the story, unless she was trying to convince me..."

Her fists clenched, and her eyes narrowed.

"It feels like murky water," Kita muttered. "It feels dirty."






"No, your majesty."

Corelia let out a heavy sigh when hearing that answer from Shira and Atara. The two lieutenants stood across from her, while she was waiting behind the grand desk at the back of her observatory.

Nearby, looking through one of the books, there was a sylph woman who seemed to be in her late twenties or early thirties. Her hair was only shoulder-length and dark brown, and her eyes were blue. She wore a noble's dress that was primarily mint green, as well as a small golden crown with one amethyst.

Atara continued in her report, "I'm sorry. There are just no more clues in the Blood Forest region. I think the only way we'll get more information now is interrogation, but I know you're hesitant due to the risks involved." She turned to the blue-eyed woman. "Find any clues, Maia?"

Maia shook her head, closing the book. "I've looked through as many notes on the Zyreans as possible, specifically ones covering the years that Kita has been alive, but I can't find anything else that could help us understand this situation. Definitely nothing that could be related to her."

Shira tried to sound encouraging. "Well, your majesty, you just saw her the other night, yes? If she went that long and was in even relatively good condition, she can probably hold her own for a bit longer."

"Even if it is by acting like a traitor," Atara muttered.

"No, it wasn't so simple," Corelia explained. "For one, Leiytning was there, and he was right behind her for almost the entirety of our conversation. If she expressed any desire to come back, or something about our history, she likely would've been punished. I can only hope he didn't do anything after she left."

Shira sighed, "If that's not nerve-wracking, I don't know what is."

Corelia continued, "I had to read between her lines and focus on the subtext. I know she was trying to tell me what happened, but in a way that wouldn't get her in trouble. That's not to say there was no frustration toward us..." She sighed, "Which is understandable. It must've been frustrating from her perspective, feeling that no one was helping her."

With an empathetic expression, Shira replied, "You are the queen of this entire land, Aunt Corelia. The largest kingdom in the entire Northern Territories, with the highest population. On top of that, just like the last queen, you take the role of general as well. Our army requires even more attention, even with the help of lieutenants. You can't expect to read everyone perfectly, and you can't expect to be able to help them all."

"She has a point," Maia remarked. "You do put a lot of pressure on yourself."

"Such is my job," Corelia muttered. "Nevermind, the point is that I can tell Kita isn't merely a traitor. I doubt the demons are going to give her anything she wants, so now she's just there as a hostage. She must be miserable, and gods only know what they're telling her."

"It is concerning," Shira agreed. "However, you could surely make a difference if you got to talk to her again. Until then, as I said, she can probably hold her own. The demons obviously don't want her dead either."

Corelia shook her head. "I can't be too sure. I don't know what it is, but I have this horrible feeling that something's going wrong. I don't know if it's valid, or if I'm just fretting."

Atara nodded. "We should quicken the pace. It sounds like the sooner we do something, the better."

"But what?" Corelia murmured. "As long as Leiytning keeps holding answers over her head, I can't be sure that she'll come back on her own. I don't want to sound mean, but Kita is a naive person. Fragile and ignorant, but to a degree, stubborn. There's no guarantee she'll listen."

"That's why I'm thinking we need to take action," Atara insisted. "This could be a matter of saving her life, whether she chooses to believe it or not."

Shira rested a hand on her shoulder. "Let's slow down a little. We should have an emergency plan, but let's not sink to their level or lose our heads about it."

Maia gained a faint smile. "I'm amazed she managed to reason with demons. How did she manage to do it, when talking peacefully has never worked before?"

"It's because they're using her, Maia," Corelia responded. "She's not a soldier, so they can push her around without repercussion. When it comes to the weak, demons like to toy with their prey, especially Zyreans."

Atara tapped the hilt of her sword. "They only think there won't be repercussions. Speaking of which, we have new weapons, right? Let's use that. Hope they're strong enough, and go in with our fingers crossed."

Corelia looked confused for a moment, but then recalled what she was talking about.

"Right, those," the queen murmured. "They haven't been tested, and I don't even think they're finished. There's too much uncertainty to use them anyway."

"But the payoff could be more than worth it," Atara explained. "Our blades are already the most pristine in the Northern Territories, admitted even by the demons, and our armor isn't far behind. If we can successfully upgrade the enchantments on either, it'll do more than pierce demon flesh. It'll burn. And the armor won't change our mortal bodies, but it will put us at the same level as those that aren't. We could get Kita back by force; if we're lucky, we could even put a blade through that wretched demon king! And you know how blood twins work, your majesty..."

Atara set up two red markers on the table.

"Once he goes down..." She knocked one into the other. "The spirit-walker will fall too. The beta will predictably frenzy and get himself killed. The rest will be directionless."

"You're being overeager, Atara," Corelia argued. "These weapons may be stronger than what we have, but they are far from being a guaranteed victory, especially one as convenient as you're describing. The payoff could be that high, but the odds are still against us, and if the weapons fail to work, the cost of soldiers' lives to get us out of that mess would be far too great."

"Furthermore, we have to consider Kita," Shira murmured. "If we attack, and we aren't immediately successful in retrieving her, they could blame her. She would be punished, maybe even killed."

"What about 'confronting the demon king'?" Asked Atara. "Where's your fire?"

"I already have confronted him," Corelia said flatly. "It just reminded me how futile that route is. The only way Leiytning gives me information is if it's a trap."

Atara shook her head. "Look, I can see your points. However, there aren't many other options. Kita's too deep in their territory for us to send a message or sneak her out, and scouts always get caught and attacked."

"Why don't we compromise?" Asked Shira. "Before we dive straight into action, maybe we can give Kita a little more time. She may send another message, and may even make it to the stream again."

"That seems like the best course of action," Corelia murmured. "We can give Kita another two or three days, and if there's still no update, we'll start asking questions. Even if Leiytning is unwilling to speak, maybe I can decipher something from the lesser warriors. If we do receive word from Kita, or find a clue, we'll act accordingly. Maybe she'll be feeling better, then we could help her chart an escape route. Regardless, we'll have to work harder to get her out."

"Perfect!" Shira remarked, Maia nodding as well.

Atara sighed, "It'll do."

"Alright, then," Corelia replied. "Proceed as usual, but be very careful-"

Suddenly, one of the doors of the observatory swung open, startling the four of them. One guard stepped inside, bowing to the queen.

"Your majesty," the guard spoke, "There is a specially-recognized citizen that seems quite, well, eager to speak with you."

"Strange, I wasn't expecting anyone," Corelia murmured. "You may let them in."

The guard stepped back outside for only a second, before someone else barreled through the door toward them.


The bright figure was quickly tripped and restrained by Atara. The lieutenants were naturally alarmed and defensive, whereas Corelia hardly blinked.

On the ground, there was a pretty young sylph with shiny, curly turquoise hair and vibrant green eyes. She was wearing a dress with a white and purple striped top, a purple skirt, and plenty of pink embellishments. She was clearly dazed from the sudden drop.

Corelia sighed, "That girl needs to work on her entrances."

The girl looked angry. "What was that for, you walking tin cans?!"

"What?!" Atara exclaimed. "You just charged into the queen's private observatory, completely unannounced! I oughta-"

"Everyone, settle down," Corelia said calmly, stepping out from behind the desk. "She's a friend."

Maia cringed. "Are you okay, Mao?"

"Yup!" Mao sprang back up. "Hello, your majesty! I have returned!"

Corelia chuckled, "I can see that. Is Yuna with you?"

"She's in the city too," Mao replied. "She got a headache though, so stayed behind to rest."

Atara arched one brow. "Your majesty, I know I've seen her before, but who is this?"

The girl saluted. "Mao Atsuya, ma'am!"

"Mao has been a friend of Kita's for a long time," Corelia explained. "For that reason, in all my checkups on Kita as a girl, I also ran into her quite frequently."

"Then, she's not a threat?" Asked Atara.

Shira nudged her. "How could anyone this cute be a threat?"

"Ugh..." Atara sighed, "Sorry for the attack. Soldier's instinct, you know."

"Still hurts," Mao muttered. "That's okay, though, I'm used to having to wrestle people..." She grumbled under her breath, "Someone has to teach the closed-minded bums in our village a lesson, when they start calling names."

Atara turned back toward the queen. "Your majesty, Shira and I will leave you to this meeting. Should you need us, we'll be standing by."

Maia put away the last book she had. "Atara, would you like to train with me?"

Fully losing her annoyed expression, Atara smiled back at her. "Sure. Let's go."

"Good day, you three," Corelia replied.

With a respectful goodbye, the two lieutenants and princess left the observatory, the large doors closing behind them.

"They seem nice," Mao remarked. "The two with silver hair, I mean. I've met Maia before."

"They are, very," Corelia answered. "They're some of my best warriors, and while this doesn't get discussed much, Atara and Shira are my nieces."

Mao flinched. "I didn't know that!"

Corelia winked. "There's a lot of things about the Erxinas that people don't know. How have things been for you in Lion's Bridge? No more trouble, I hope."

"Simple but sweet. We're just having fun and enjoying ourselves, as best we can. I'm stuck with my parents, but I was hoping to move in with Kita soon."

"That sounds like it would be fun for you."

"It would! Speaking of Kita, can you tell me about the progress that's been made?"

"Ah..." An anxious glimmer manifested in Corelia's eyes. "Kita told you about her plans?"

"Only the basics, including-" Mao quickly covered her mouth. "I-I mean, you know, in general. The plan, you know? Not the secret parts- I mean, the more..."

Corelia laughed, "Calm down, dear, you're shaking like a leaf. I know how Kita works; I expected some information to leak to you, I just figured you three wouldn't spread it anywhere else. Yuna's been able to keep it to herself since she was a girl, after all."

"So I won't be in trouble if I say the 'D' word?" Asked Mao.

"Of course not," Corelia replied.

Mao took a deep breath. "Thank goodness, I was terrified of that ever since we left. Anyway, she covered almost everything. That the emblem belonged to a group of demons, but nobody knew why it was important to her. That's when we got the most scared, especially Yuna."

"Yes, I do," Corelia responded. "I must admit, I'm trying not to think about that; it's making me even more anxious about where Kita is, now."

"I understand," Mao sadly agreed. "Which also means, surely, you can understand why we're eager to hear about her progress. Is she doing better? Is she sleeping okay?"

Corelia lost her smile, but tried to appear calm. "Where do you think she was going, when she left Lion's Bridge?"

Baffled, Mao hesitantly explained, "She said she was going right back to the city. You were going to help her work through this demon nonsense, and she wanted us to wait until it's over before we reunite..." She grinned, "She didn't say we couldn't wait in the city, though, and she didn't say we couldn't ask you for details!"

"And Yuna thinks the same?"

"Yes..." Mao's confusion changed into worry. "Why are you asking this?"

"Stay calm, dear," Corelia spoke softly. "She told you nothing else? Did you happen to notice anything unusual about the interaction?"

Mao hesitated. "I did think it was unusual that Kita was so persistent about going alone, but at the same time, she does prefer to be alone during hard times -as much as it annoys Yuna and me. That, and if her sickness got any worse, she didn't want us to see her that way."

"What in the world?" Corelia muttered. "That girl used to go cross-eyed, trying to tell a lie. She must've improved."

Mao gasped, "Wait, what? What do you mean by lying?"

Corelia sighed, "Perhaps you should sit down for a moment. We have a lot to talk about."

Is this a review?



User avatar
96 Reviews

Points: 2976
Reviews: 96

Sat May 04, 2024 1:24 am
View Likes
dragonight9 wrote a review...

Hi! Dragon here for another review. Can't wait to see what happens next.

That upon which my dragon's eye fixed

I am really enjoying seeing the more caring side of the Zyreans. Just from the brief interactions I've read so far I have a feeling I'm going to enjoy Zim's character. So long as his pranks don't end up going too far...

I like the reveal that Seyber sees Kita as a friend, and even Zin feels little hostility towards her.

"Fine..." Zin spun toward the door. "Lord Zin desists!"

Seyber rolled her eyes. "Anyway-"

"Lord Zin opens the door!" Zin exclaimed.

Ohhh yeah. I'm definitely going to like this guy. That is exactly my kind of humor.

It felt unusual to have someone take care of her out of sheer kindness. At the same time, it caused a warm sensation that tugged at her heart.

I wonder if Kita would be able to recognise her original friend's kindness at this point. Perhaps she has a little more growing to do but it gives me hope to see a different interaction between them the next time they meet.

I like how Kita is thinking about Corelia differently, but I hope she doesn't swing too far in the other direction. Her queen Was trying to protect her in her own way. I also like your last line:
"It feels like murky water," Kita muttered. "It feels dirty."

A new character, and Corelia's niece no less! How interesting. (I wonder if that crown has any magic in it)

I also think Corelia might be reading a bit too much into it. Plus it seems like she herself believes the 'lies' about the Zyreans. Expecting them to torture Kita right away. (though I suppose that would be expected from an enemy nation/tribe)

The whole scene before Mao comes bursting in is nice. I like seeing how they are trying to think of other options all the time even while waiting for new developments with Kita.

Shira nudged her. "How could anyone this cute be a threat?"

hmmm, I wonder what you may be hinting at here. I would probably use the word flamboyant to describe Mao.

"What in the world?" Corelia muttered. "That girl used to go cross-eyed, trying to tell a lie. She must've improved."

I like the idea of Kita being that terrible at lying. Not only does it speak to her innate good nature/honesty, but also a bit to her clumsiness and naivety.

Some loose scales

That's when we got the most scared, especially Yuna."
Again, another great chapter with few improvements that I could spot!

"Yes, I do," Corelia responded. "I must admit, I'm trying not to think about that

The "Yes, I do." response confused me a little. Is she saying that she knew or feels the same? If it is the later then why restate it just after?

As mighty wing soar overall

I enjoyed seeing the kindness of the Zyreans and Kita's growing acceptance of it. Though this is making things tough for her it also seems like she is starting to think through this more objectively.

I also enjoyed seeing how plans on Corelia's side are advancing. For some reason I thought that Mao and Yuna were going directly to the demons so it was good to see that they connected to Corelia and will now understand what is actually going on.

Final wisdom of the scaled one

I am enjoying the proportions of story perspectives. I enjoy hearing more about the Zyreans and what is happening there and you have balanced it well so the story isn't too focused on Sybilius.

May blazing dragon-fire light your path and ignite the flames of your inspiration.

User avatar
61 Reviews

Points: 212
Reviews: 61

Mon Mar 11, 2024 3:05 pm
View Likes
keeperofgaming wrote a review...

And here it is. The place where the sun shatters.

When I smiled:

Seyber's care for Kita is plain to see and is touching. I also like how she directly consider's Kita a friend, showing her character as well as how much the relationship between them has grown. She seems to really care for Kita, allowing the duo to connect.

Zin is also just a comedic character, despite his dark and deep nature, he remains playful, able to make Kita laugh. I also like his slight tsunderish side, showing that he cares deeply for Kita, but he won't admit it as he wants to be scary to her in order to please the others.

Also, I like how you show Corelia's true ignorance in how the Zyrean's run, proving that the whole war is based in ignorance and misconceptions. This cements her as a good character, while simultaneously showing one of her biggest faults. It proves her as a good character and makes her likeable.

I also like her brutal honesty, showing that she is unaware of her own hatred. She is brutally honest to both, and, as we had her pov in the first revelation chapter, we saw that she genuinely didn't hold anything back. She simply didn't realize the abomination she committed and saw the Zyrean's as volatile, intelligent beasts.

A Line to Remember:

"It feels like murky water," Kita muttered. "It feels dirty."

This was interesting, it showed that she knows that something essential is missing. With this missing knowledge, I feel like she will use it to show a way to peace for both sides.

Especially since this knowledge provides a direct contrast with the Corelia we occasionally see the POV of. I sincerely think something essential that will shift everyone's perception will appear.

The Catalyst's Growth:

Kita finally feels partially at home with the demons, her comfort in talking with Seyber and Zin is wholesome, and I quite like that she develops a sense that there is something that she hasn't realized yet.

All in all, well done.

RavenAkuma says...

Thanks for your great reviews today! Again, your theories are fascinating (some came quite close, but I won't say which, and things might get shaken up a bit in the meantime ;))

Thanks for taking the time to read and review! :)

keeperofgaming says...

nice. and thanks for writing

User avatar
151 Reviews

Points: 39462
Reviews: 151

Tue Mar 05, 2024 9:45 pm
View Likes
PKMichelle wrote a review...

Hello, friend!
I saw another chapter waiting in the Green Room, so here I am to check it out!


Per my interpretation, you hit this one out of the park yet again! Every chapter is so wonderful and adds so much greatness to the fantastic story you're working to tell!

Brief Summary: Kita finally wakes up with the help of a stimulant powder and is met by Seyber and Zin. They talk a bit when Seyber mentions a friendship, which catches Kita's attention and leaves her a tad confused. Kita is then left alone with her thoughts and to question Corelia's motives. The perspective changes to Corelia and two lieutenants, who are all trying to devise a plan to get to Kita. This, however, is interrupted when Mao shows up to ask about Kita's progress. And it's in this moment that Mao finds out that Kita's not where she thought she was.

Much, much, much interesting information!!

If I could offer any sort of advice, there wouldn't be too much to comment on! You keep everything at a very high standard, which is so amazing!

But there was one sentence that threw me for a loop. It was when Seyber mentioned the sleeping powder and Kita thought it sounded like a good idea. The structure of the sentence was just a little strange. You said,

Kita thought about asking for that powder anyway, the sound of a deep sleep very appealing, but then remembered the last medications she had taken.

I'm not too sure if you just forgot to add a word in there or phrased what you were trying to say wrong, so I have two different solutions to this problem. You could say,

Kita thought about asking for that powder anyway, the sound of a deep sleep was very appealing, but then remembered the last medications she had taken.


Kita thought about asking for that powder anyway, a deep sleep sounded very appealing, but then remembered the last medications she had taken.

But, obviously, this is just a suggestion, and it's always up to the writer, so please take this criticism lightly and know that I mean nothing negative by it—only trying to provide a somewhat useful critique.

If I had to pick my favorite part, I would have some trouble, but for good reasons!! I love all of the characters and their dynamics, as well as the little details that come through with each new paragraph!! So, I picked a couple of things that really seemed to pop out while I was reading!

The first thing that stood out to me was Kita's emotional reaction when Seyber referred to her as a friend. It seemed Kita became quite confused, which in a way highlighted her lack of healthy relationships and how lonely she can feel due to her illness. You said,

"Friends help each other," Seyber replied. "It's not that complicated."

Kita looked confused. "You consider us friends?"

Kita didn't know how to react. A demon for a friend—of all people? And even though Kita seemed a little distraught at first, she sank it to it and realized that this was more than likely a good thing. This is what she needed—a companion in the Blood Forest—and finally someone gave that to her. And the scene in which it was done was awkwardly beautiful, so kudos to you for writing that!!

The other thing that really caught my eye while I was reading was how much care and priority Queen Corelia put into trying to make sure Kita was safe. She was going through everything—all of the possibilities, everything that could go wrong—all in the interest of Kita. You said,

"She has a point," Maia remarked. "You do put a lot of pressure on yourself."

"Such is my job," Corelia muttered. "Nevermind, the point is that I can tell Kita isn't merely a traitor. I doubt the demons are going to give her anything she wants, so now she's just there as a hostage. She must be miserable, and gods only know what they're telling her."

Corelia is incredibly worried about Kita, completely unaware that she is relatively fine, and actually kind of distressed with the queen for all of the lies. It shows how caring, thoughtful, and loving Corelia actually is, despite the fact that she's been lying. It makes it seem like she lied to protect Kita and the rest of the Aubades from everything that's happening now. It shines a new and brighter light on Corelia that I've been waiting to see, so good job there!

Overall, this was yet another astonishing chapter!! You're always doing such a wonderful job, and I always have such a stellar time reading everything! I'm looking forward to the next chapter!!!

Thank you for taking the time to write and post this, and I hope this review is of some use to you!

Goodbye for now! I hope you have a magnificent day (or night) wherever you are!

RavenAkuma says...

Welcome back!! That recommendation has been noted, I can see how the sentence read awkwardly. As always, thanks for taking the time to read and review! :)

There are darknesses in life and there are lights, and you are one of the lights, the light of all lights.
— Bram Stoker