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Young Writers Society


18+ Language Mature Content

Cocaine And Other Things (Chapter 2)

by Rascalover


Warning: This work has been rated 18+ for language and mature content.

Dear Tara,

You weren't hard to spot. I've seen millions like you, and there will continue to be millions after you. The destruction of humanity fuels the need for my friends and I; people everywhere will always look for an escape. Isn't that what you wanted? A way out of the life you never asked for. I call us Hell's Angel. We give relief and comfort, escape and pleasure. The only downfall, you humans don't know when to stop. You're cute in the beginning, just a line of coke here to live out the party, just a hit of heroin here to come down from the coke. You go on about your days with your jobs, your friends, your loved ones, thinking no one is noticing your slow downfall, and maybe you're right. But, I love how it's always our fault when your lives decrease in worth, slow to a hault, and you can't keep anything tangible.

I originated across the seas, but people hungry with greed smuggled me into your cities for money and upkeep. From one man's pocket to another, I made it into the poorest cities. Families with no incomes, no futures, no hope. I bring a tiny piece of comfort and stability. I create a lifestyle, and soon they can afford rent and food. All at a cost because the men in blue decided there should be a war against us. Forcing your fathers, brothers, cousins, nephews to scour the underbellies of the city in darkness to not get caught.

The first time I saw you, you looked like one of the clean ones. I couldn't tell if you belonged here or not, and when you turned down the chance to inhale me I knew it'd be a fight to entice you. How to lure you in was a question for the humans; I just had to be available in the perfect timing.

Ready or not here I come,

Cocaine


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104 Reviews


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Reviews: 104

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Fri Mar 23, 2018 12:29 pm
Danni88 wrote a review...



Hi Rascalover! Danni here for a review!

This wasn't as good as the first chapter, but it was still good.

Forcing your fathers, brothers, cousins, nephews


This part seems a bit sexist. It appears to imply only males do this, which is inaccurate.

The meaning is so true, and shows exactly why people should never take drugs.

Love the way Tara gets a reply! Personifying it was a really good idea.

Overall, this needs some work, but I still enjoyed it!


Danni x




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51 Reviews


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Reviews: 51

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Wed Mar 21, 2018 8:25 am
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Nobunaga wrote a review...



Hello again!

I'm sorry to say, but I don't really like this part as much as the first. Mainly, I don't see where Cocaine's point of view can progress beyond this point. Honestly, I'd much rather have read another bit of Tara's pov. Giving a voice to Cocaine isn't really adding anything to the story for me. And I can imagine it becoming really tedious to read if it's a constant interruption to Tara's story.

I understand what you're going for, and I'm going to reserve harsh judgement for Cocaine's next installment, but at this point I really see the need for it.

Now, if you would have inserted Tara into this bit, then that would've made sense to me. If there was some snippet of Tara doing the drug for the first time, Cocaine "watching" her, in a sense, then I would've been on board. I don't know how you would execute that exactly, but when there's a will, there's a way.

But this is just leaving me wanting for more. I'm gonna stop this review here though. I don't want to ramble.




Rascalover says...


Thanks so much!




Beware of advice—even this.
— Carl Sandburg