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The Snake and the Frogs

by Phillauthet


There once lived a snake
who was called Fred.
He lived near a lake,
And was underfed.

He wished he could eat
all the frogs in the grass,
But was weak to compete
with the frog class.

So he went to the frog king
who was Reg, by name.
He was a vain being,
the snake's friend, he became.

The queen, known as Meg,
disapproved of the choice.
She was the mother of Greg
and had a pretty voice.

'Oh my king!' she said,
'What relation is this?
It fills me with dread,
I know something's amiss!

But the king ignored her
and introduced the snake,
to all his children, ma'ams and sirs
and they sat and had cake.

Soon, the snake came to live
with the frogs in the grass
and asked the king to give
food for his daily pass.

Now the king had taken
many favours from the snake
and was thoroughly shaken
by the request he did make!

So he let the snake eat,
a couple of frogs a day,
to make his ends meet
and so he had his way.

Fred ate not two but more
of his share of food.
He was much joyous than before,
and he felt really good.

Now he'd finished eating
all the frogs present,
and was just completing
his meal with a stray rodent.

So he went to the king
who pleaded for his life.
All his subjects dying
had left him in utter strife.

The snake simply said
'Your life is vital to you.
But I hate to be underfed,
my hunger is important too!'

And so saying, the wily snake
gobbled up his meal,
and slithered off to make
with more animals, deals.

So which is right to you?
One's life, or one's food?
Did the snake lose his virtue?
Did he really play no good?

Did he really do wrong?
By eating his rightly meal?
By fulfilling his needs and wants?
So, what do you feel?


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Comments



User avatar
31 Reviews

Points: 51
Reviews: 31

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Tue May 11, 2021 12:59 pm
BlueGlow wrote a review...



This was an interesting poem. I like the fact that you kept a consistent rhyming scheme but sometimes it feels just a bit forced. To be fair to you, rhyming schemes are really hard to stick to and more so for a poem as long as this. The cool thing about your poem is: its unique! I've never seen this sort of combination of frogs and snakes and hunger! Overall, this is a respectable work!




Phillauthet says...


Thanks for the review! It'll be great if you could give me an example of a part where the rhyme sounds forced... So I can work on making it better



BlueGlow says...


Absolutely,
"Soon, the snake came to live
with the frogs in the grass
and asked the king to give
food for his daily pass."

In this stanza pass doesn't really make sense. Perhaps I missed something but it seems that this line had to rhyme and so, we have a rhyme but the line doesn't make sense.



User avatar
17 Reviews

Points: 948
Reviews: 17

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Mon May 10, 2021 8:58 pm
slubbs24 wrote a review...



Hello, I've never written a review so bear with me xD.

I really enjoyed this poem, it was very rhythmic.
The title caught my eye, .... most animal titles do. I felt like I was learning a life lesson because it reminded me of the Tortoise and the Hare.

"But was weak to compete
with the frog class."
This line was well said and made me understand the situation the snake was in and helped the reader understand why they befriended a frog later on.

"Fred ate not two but more
of his share of food."
I felt this statement was a bit clunky. It didn't role off the tongue smoothly for me.

Overall I left reading this with somewhat of a lesson. This concludes my very short review.

Continue writing your poems are splendid.

~slubbs




Phillauthet says...


Thanks for the review!




No spring nor summer beauty hath such grace as I have seen in one autumnal face.
— John Donne