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The night is breezy and the starry sky shines over my church. I can feel the wind pass over my shoulders. The middle-schoolers sit by the bonfire cooking marshmallows for s’mores. The summer heat is digging into my body. I imagine others seeing me, the eighth grader on the rock in a bad mood. I'm not though, it's just I'm tired, it's ten at night and I need a breath of cool air.
I walk from the church's backyard to a group leader by the front doors.
"I need to use the restroom." I say. Although it’s a white lie, I might need to do that anyway. I walk inside. The room is full of fresh air. Looking down, I can see my green shorts have clumpy dry dirt stuck all over them. I brush it off.
The voices traveling from another room become louder. A group of highschoolers walk into the lobby and find their way to different sections in the room. People pass me on my way to the restroom, coming from upstairs.
Suddenly the restroom door, now only feet away, slams open, and a big lady rushes out, laughing.
What’s up with her? I think, watching as she turns into a separate hallway. I reach out to finally open the door into the restroom, but something holds it in place, then suddenly pulls it open, and I fly backwards. A little girl in golden pigtails pops out, pinching her nose shut with her fingers. The face only a mother could love.
"Don't go in there! It smells!" she says, and then runs off. I sniff the room tentatively, and wish I hadn’t.
Yuck. I dust myself off again, moving away from the restroom, and look up just in time to see a guy come walking past. I step widely away from the restroom door so I don't smell. He stops really close, and as he pulls his cell-phone from his pocket, it slips out of his hands and clatters to the floor.
I turn slightly, and bend down to get it for him. "Here you go," I say. Why was this strange? I remembered those pants from somewhere and those shoes and that shirt...I’d seen him before. Why didn't I realize earlier? It was that boy I like!
He has earphones in, and when he sees me pick up his cell, he takes them out. I hand him the phone. His jade-green eyes under those dark lashes look at me.
"Thanks," he says, but instead of taking it, he puts his hand over mine. He looks into my eyes. I need to say something! They follow my face making him look curious about what I'm thinking. I realize I'm holding on to his phone.
"Oh, uh…you're welcome."
He nods, finally removing his hand, with the cell in it. Why is he staring at my face? I always get shy whenever people look straight at me. It feels like they can figure out my expression and think all the wrong things about me. But it's cute. The way he looks at me.
Blood rushes to my face. Oh, I’m ruining it again! I hastily turn away, feeling completely defeated. I want to run outside and scream!
"Oh, your..." I look back at him as he mumbles something, to see he's leaning down to get something of the carpet. "You dropped your iPod."
"Thanks,” I mumble looking at the floor. Why do I do that? Gosh, it's like chemical reactions are going off in my head!
"You're welcome." He gives it to me. " So, what are-" he sais.
"Seth, come on, you're holding us up! Aren't you hungry?" a man's voice calls from the other room.
"I'm coming!" he yells back.
" Gosh, I hate it when he does that. Still, I have to deal with him always bothering me because he's my best friend." He says friendly.
"Your name is Seth?" I ask shyly.
His green eyes follow mine. "Yup, what's yours?"
I stutter a few times before blurting out, "My name's Paige." I can't believe I'm talking to him! I remember when he saw me for the first time and we always had that 'thing' for each other.
"Cool name. Umm…are you going outside for the bonfire now?" he asks, and I note the adorable way his brown hair is always falling over one eye.
"Yeah, I just came in for some non-smoky air," I tell him.
His eyes twinkle – it's so beautiful, somehow. "Are you in middle school?" he asks.
"Going into high school in August. What about you?" I smile just to return his – well, and to look cute, of course.
"Ninth going into tenth," he says, rubbing his shoulder in a way I can only interpret as embarrassment. His eyes wander around the hallway. What was he going to say? Just tell me!
" Ok, well I have to go, bye..." I said walking away as there is a major pause. I'm trying to think about what he meant to say. There was something he was going to tell me, wasn't there?
“Oh, there you are, Seth--uhm, is this the girl?” A familiar looking man stands at my end of the hallway coming nearer. He shivers from being outside. "Hurry up, guys, I don't want you messing around back here – haha." Oh, bother.
Seth’s face turns red. "So...if you want to, you can sit with me at the bonfire...tell stories, and whatever...else there is." He looks back to me waiting for my call. I knew it. He did want to tell me something.
"Sure, that sounds fine," I tell him sweetly. My first crush asking me to sit with him! I desperately want to know what he's thinking. We walk back outside, and the breeze is stronger.
"It's cold out here isn't it?" he says. The bonfire is bigger now. Music fills my ears. I find a place to sit with him. I nod.
"So, what do you want to talk about?" he asks.
"I don't know," I tell him. He grabs a guitar. I wonder where that came from? Oh, it's Quinn's. Funny how he just takes it off it's lean on the tree behind us.
"Hmm, know any songs?" He holds it out to me.
"I might know a couple, but I can't promise the best song of the decade," I warn him. He smiles.
"It doesn't matter, as long as it's noise.” He leans back against the tree behind us, looking into the sky as I play a few Christian songs I heard over the radio a couple days back. I keep looking at him. His expression is contented, even happy, but still awfully shy.
"You stopped playing." What did he mean? Oh, I accidentally stopped playing the guitar. I guess I got distracted, paying too much attention to Seth.
" I'm sorry, I'm just…” I pause - dare I say everything I’ve ever felt about him? …No, I can’t, not yet anyway. "I’m just distracted, that's all. Do you want to play?"
He grabs the guitar neck and situates it just so. He strums the chords. "It takes just a little practice to get it right. Do you know ‘You Found Me,’ by ‘The Fray’?"
"Oh my gosh, yes! I love it. But I can't keep up with the words,” I say. He nods as he strums different notes.
"I'll sing it to you, then…
Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lying on the floor
Surrounded, surrounded
Why’d you have to wait?
Where were you, where were you?
Just a little late...
You found me, you found me...”
By the time he finishes, our faces are close together. His green eyes reflect the flickering depths of the bonfire – oh, yes, do I want to kiss him! I've seen it in movies...imagined it in books...what would a real kiss be like?
He leans just a little bit closer. "You found me," I whisper.Maybe he didn't hear. I didn't really want him too. I kind of just said it. Impulse. He shuts his eyes. I think this is what people feel when they have their first kiss – It ends. It was just a second or two. It was wonderful! Like kissing a snowflake right before it passes the lips to melt on the ground.
He pulls away and smiles . My hands start shaking, but why I’m not completely sure.
"Why don't we join the others and eat?" I murmur, still sort of mesmerized by the fiery light in his eyes. He puts his guitar leaning on the tree behind us.
"As long as you don't keep blushing every time you see me. Now you can just come up to me and tell me all you want. I know more about you now, no need for shyness," he says. So he actually noticed my shy side! He's really one in a million. I'm so glad he’s even here tonight. He grabs my hand and pulls me to the middle-school group.
Maybe it's true love, or just a little crush.I'm not sure, but tonight explained it... I just couldn't under stand it completely, but it was a powerful feeling blowing through me.
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