Lucy left the club feeling invigorated and lazy in the same moment, she walked the alley slowly, her jacket slung loosely over her shoulder and her hair in glorious disarray. Her muscles still taunt with the dance, and her skirt and top clinging to her skin, damp with sweat. She twirled, her skirt flipping around her thighs as she bellowed a yell and smiled widely at her triumph over the night.
I own the night, and the dance, and the stars! her mind sang with joy.
She gloried in the cool air as it tingled along her skin, moving along the ally and onto the street, skipping every few steps. Dancing had always affected her like this, it could be several hours before she fully got a hold of herself. It was her drug.
She breathed in deep and continued on her path to home, moving more quickly now, eager to get home to feed her cat. She grinned, shaking out her hair and running her fingers through it, trying and failing to untangle it. Instead the strands caught on her nails and pulled. Eventually, she gave up on the notion and skipped on ahead, keeping the dance in her step even though the music was far behind her.
Avalon was only a mile or so from her house, so Lucy decided to walk, she was too animated to stand and wait for a bus anyways. Just a few blocks outside her studio apartment she was beginning to notice an uncomfortable chill that settled around her. Immediately on guard, she drew in her breath, the giddiness leaving her almost instantly. Her mother would have been furious with her for letting her guard down for so long. To be unaware was to be prey. Sheridan women did not become prey.
Now her mind was alert, stretching out ahead of her to see what her eyes could not. Lucy sucked in a breath as she felt her aura brush that of another; she'd felt this one before. It was powerful, old-- possibly older than the magic that ran through her veins. She could taste it now, bitter and rich, like chocolate that had not touched sugar.
She paused, deciding whether it would be wise to draw her would be stalker into the light. Deciding that attempting to hide would not benefit her, she closed her eyes and summoned what bravery she could. “I know you're there, why don't you face me and tell me what you want.” She felt silly speaking to the darkness, but she knew she was not alone.
There was a small chuckle after that, almost inaudible to her ears, but it managed to make her recoil; that was not human.
Her mother, Loraine Sheridan, had warned Lucy of this day. They were drawn to their kind, it was the blood, always the blood. Perhaps theirs was stronger or sweeter, they had never known. The world had not made them more tempting without giving them anything to defend themselves though, She was anything but helpless against her stalker. Still, she did not favor the idea of a fight tonight, it would ruin her good mood.
“Fine!” Lucy shouted to the darkness. “Be that way!”
She stalked home, all too aware of the powerful being that trailed behind her. She was more than relieved when she got to her apartment door unscathed, breathing out a sigh as the weight in the air lifted and she entered into a world all her own.
Vampire's could not enter a home to which they were not invited, but more than that, the incantations she had placed around her home would keep her safe. No matter how powerful he was, these magicks were ancient, they would not be breached.
…
Caleb watched his Goddess with a vicious smile. He had known she was different, but the feel of her brushing him in such a way, tasting him. She was powerful, he could feel it, the crackling of her sorcery against his skin was deliriously delicious.
He stood outside her apartment until the rays of morning sun threatened to end him where he stood, closing his eyes he concentrated hard, and reappeared in his room. He lay back onto his bed, the plush comforter held no comfort for him. He smiled in contentment as he felt his family fluttering into the homes around him, the blood they shared drawing them together to this place where they formed a sort of village. Hundreds of them congregated, seeking the comfort of each other's presence.
Soon, he would bring her here. Soon, she would make her his completely. She would be bound to him forever.
And they would have forever.
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,855 Reviews
Hello OverEasy!
Okay, I am here to be picky (gasp!) and do a review!
What about "she stormed, or she walked, or something because stalk sounds weird in that context.
is magicks spelled wrong?
Otherwise it was absoulutly incredible and i would not be surprised if next month i saw it on a shelf in my local bookstore.
Ciao,
Kally
Lol I assure you this story will not have anything to do with Twilight. It sort of starts out like Twilight (think of it as my form of a Parody, though in not in such an obvious way.)
There are a few main differences. But to tell you them now would, of course, ruin everything.
However, I think that if you continue reading you will be pleasantly surprised.
Hi OverEasy,
Another quick review for another short piece. I liked this chapter more than I thought I would, mainly because Lucy comes across as a fun, sympathetic character with real personality. The first four paragraphs in particular are delightful to read.
I'm a little unsure about the vampire stuff. It's worked into the narrative pretty smoothly and I never got an infodump feeling, which is good. But I feel like I've already read the story of the girl whose blood is so magically delicious that a vampire is desperately attracted to her and must possess her for his own: it was called Twilight, and you might have heard of it. I'm starting to pre-emptively twitch every time I read about a girl who is special because of her special blood, because it's just so close to Twilight. (I also wish that just once I'd read about a girl who was special for something she'd done, an achievement I could respect, rather than for something she was born with and never had to lift a finger for.)
Caleb is still a creepy misogynist. The plush comforter feels weird and possibly out of place. I'm worrying that the Caleb scenes are feeling generic -- stereotypically dark and stalkery, the kind of stock bad guy that pops up in all sorts of stories obsessing over the protagonist.
Liking Lucy much more than Caleb at the moment, which is a shame because Caleb has had the majority of the story, I think.
Hope this helps.
Cheers,
Karsten