Young Writers Society

I love this poem. You did a very good job. I like how you described the things people feel when life isn't going so great for them. The inspirational part of the poem at the end made it soo much better. I like how you only used rhymes at certain parts of the poem. I do have a suggestion for you though, what if you combined the last four lines. Have live and cry together as one line and have fall and rise together for the last line. Just a suggestion, you don't have to use it if you don't want to. I think it would still be great if you don't. Great job with this and keep up the great work!!

This is quite a realistic poem relating to the truth. However, there are a few things just a little off. You have been quite good with the rhyming and the rhythm. The last part was quite touching, but a few slips were made.

Live, Cry. Fall, Rise. Now that was a bit weird. The rest of the poem were quite long, but this part was just a sudden stop. I recommend giving a little length to it, with the touching feeling that you gave.

Live with all your might,
Cry with all your sadness,
Fall without the heart,
But rise and try again first.

Oh wow. This is good! I love how you use rhymes, but sparingly. I also love how short and simple the lines are, especially towards the end. I think that having shorter lines gives each individual word more meaning, something you've definitely taken advantage of. I think that overall it's a little long (you could've cut out some of the middle stuff; you touched on a lot of different things towards the middle but didn't elaborate, so I think either you should elaborate on specific ideas or cut them out). But other than that, I think this is a good poem!