Finding Home

Buildings cut the blue velvet sky like jagged teeth in the maw of a monster. It seemed ready to tear to shreds the street urchins that huddled around flaming garbage cans in their dark, ratty clothes. The street lights had yet to flicker on and cast dancing shadows across the sidewalk that never seemed without people. Horns blared off in the distance but they didn’t concern me. Abandoned, trashy apartment buildings lined both sides of the road. Cars made the one way street narrow and uninhabitable by other vehicles. Dogs barked, chained behind fences somewhere, screaming for their freedom to the moon, which was hidden behind wispy clouds of gray smog. I stopped behind a parked car, crouching low on my hunches as I tried to catch my breath.

Thump thump. Thump thump. Thump thump.

Sirens pierced through all the other noise, wailing for vengeance and justice. I ran.

My feet pounded against the sidewalk as my eyes searched the darkness for the blue and red flashing lights of the police cruisers that were tailing me. I had to get away from there. I slipped into an alley and vaulted myself over a chain link fence, hoping beyond hope that if there was a dog it was chained and unable to reach me. A quick search showed no dogs. A desolate parking lot stretched out before me. Browning weeds poked their heads out of deep fissure like cracks in the black endless sea of concrete. Everything around me was concrete and glass. At the end of the parking space was a building with windows both boarded up and broken. Colorful spray paint decorated the sides of the red brick building in intricate patterns, silly vulgar words that were pointlessly written out in fancy lettering. I always thought the vandals should spend their time in an art class instead of roaming the streets with a can of paint. I didn’t have time to stand there though; I had to keep going even if my legs were screaming for mercy.

I crept along the side of the building, keeping my eyes open for cops and my ears alert for sirens. Sound sometimes got distorted in the city, with all the buildings battering the sound waves like a pinball machine. I closed the distance of the parking lot and stepped out onto the sidewalk. One second, two seconds, of waiting and searching the darkness for cops. So far, there were no cars.

Thump thump. Thump thump. Thump thump.

I looked both ways for cop cars before I took off running into the street. Most of the buildings were abandoned accept for the few brave souls that took refuge from the blistering wind inside the hazardous buildings. As I ran a police car sped onto the road. I crossed the pavement in three long strides and turned into another alley, one after the other I took the alleyways that crisscrossed one another, trying to lose the sirens, and the lights, and the police inside of them. My heart pounded in my chest, echoing in my ears.

Thump thump. Thump thump. Thump thump.

It kept pace with the quick thud of my feet hitting the pavement.
When I came back out into the street, the road was blocked off by two police cars. I veered off to the left, in the opposite direction, but another car pulled in on that side. I was trapped.

Thump thump.

Breathing heavily, I looked around for somewhere to go, anywhere, but I could see nothing but those three cars and their flashing lights that made my head pound. It felt like I had fallen and hit my head on the concrete. Panic began settling in my stomach.

Thump thump.

It left a sick acidic taste in my mouth that made me gag. They were going to see me. They were going to shoot me if I didn’t come with them, but if I did go with them, I’d be locked up for the rest of my life like a wild animal. I couldn’t get caught. I couldn’t.

Someone spoke to me over a megaphone, their voice coming out all mechanic and crackly sounding. “Put your hands in the air and walk slowly toward us. Don’t make any sudden movements or we’ll shoot.” I stood where I was, looking into the blinding lights of their blaring sirens, petrified. “I repeat, put your hands in the air and walk slowly toward us.” Behind the two cop cars I could barely make out the accumulation of more cars and more flashing lights.

The sound of so many sirens was deafening. Everything was overwhelming, the sound, the lights, the guns. I couldn’t take it.

The man kept yelling at me, telling me to come over to him, to surrender. But I didn’t do anything. I didn’t do anything. Why should I surrender? Why should I turn myself in when I didn’t do anything?

I didn’t move.

The man waved to people behind him, and I watched as four rows of men filed into the road toward me. Riot shields were the only thing separating them from me. They kept coming closer and closer, wearing black clothes and bullet proof vests with the word SWAT written in white letters. In the glass reflection, I could see the image of a girl standing in the middle of an empty road. There were abandoned, spray painted buildings on either side of her. A streetlight several feet away finally began flickering on, making the shadows dance on the pavement around her. The wind stirred and rustled the white feathery wisps of hair, making it flutter about her middle back. I couldn’t tell what she was wearing, but she looked strange… dangerous almost. That couldn’t be me, I wasn’t dangerous. But it was me. And the men and their guns were getting closer and closer. I looked around quickly, looking for a place to go a place to hide.

I saw two men in suites standing beneath a streetlight, I didn’t know who they were but they stood up tall and straight and looked important. “We want her alive! I repeat we want her alive!” One of them ordered into a walkie-talkie.

Thump thump.

I turned to look back at the men and the lights, just in time to see three people run out on either side of the SWAT agents. They took to a knee and aimed guns at me.

Thump thump.

No. No I didn’t do anything wrong. They were going to shoot me, and I hadn’t done anything wrong. I looked over to the other end of the street where the one car roared alone. It looked so small compared to the crowd of cars on this side. I faced the neat even rows of men again. There was anger now, pumping through my veins, beneath the panic. I felt it in my blood, tingling. Feelings of power and retribution seemed to fill me with life. I knew now where I had to go.

I had to leave the city and go back home. All I had to do was go home. But those men were in my way. They were keeping me from my freedom and my life. My life far away from the concrete and glass, away from the red brick buildings painted in vulgar words, away from sirens and lights and men with guns.

Thump thump. Thump thump. Thump thump.

Slowly, I began to calm down. My hands stopped shaking, and I stopped fidgeting. I faced the swarm of armored men, head on.

Thump thump. Thump thump.

My sudden boldness frightened me as I stepped closer. One foot then two feet closer. I heard the collective sound of the men cocking their guns. I raised my hands as they had asked. Fear and agitation caused my heart to race, though my body was calm. A smile tickled my face as I stood there. I took a step closer to the group.

Thump thump. Thump thump.

“Stop right there!” A man called from the right of the mob. Little red dots flickered about my body which felt ice cold. I couldn’t feel my fingers. I looked at the man who spoke with fear in my eyes. I was going to die. I backed away from them, trying to get away from the red dots and the men behind the glass. My calm was shattering before my eyes.

“Don’t shoot!” Someone called but I couldn’t see who said it. I took another step backwards. I heard a shot fire.

Thump thump… Thump thump… Thump thump…

Everything blurred together and suddenly everyone was shooting, firing right at me. The sirens wailed and each blast from a gun seemed to rock the earth below my feet. A sharp pain struck me to the core, and I felt like screaming. All I could feel was pain and more pain. My vision was going spotty around the edges, but I looked at the group of huddled men, and a dumpster flew toward them like a child’s toy. I heard the distinct sound of crushing bones beneath heavy metal.

Thump thump.

People were shouting. Men in bullet proof vests were fanning out around me. Bullets whizzed by my head and my body, in a chaotic mass. They were like angered bees protecting their hive. Glass shattered into millions of pieces somewhere to my left, and moved like deadly, ghostly blades toward the men kneeling there on the sidewalk. The glass shards cut through them and blood began drenching the gray concrete.

Thump thump.

The two police cruisers that had started the whole mess, that had screamed and screamed until more and more cars came to find me, began to cave in on themselves. They crumpled like an empty can, and then slid across the blacktop toward the men who darted about in a frenzied mass. Sparks flew from the places where metal hit hard solid rock. Like the sparks in my blood that ignited the rage, the power, coursing with each frantic beat of my heart.

Guns went off but the bullets no longer came near me. Instead they darted off in different directions, embedding themselves in brick and bodies alike.

Thump thump.

Pools of blood reflected the tall black buildings and the faint glow of the moon behind the clouds of pollution.

Thump thump.
I ran.

Each step sent new waves of pain through my body, as my heart thundered ceaselessly in my chest. As I neared the opposite end of the street, the lone police car flew high above my head, slamming down on the other end of the road. Pavement cracked and splintered everywhere. The broken blocks soared through the air, crashing into skulls and walls. I didn’t look back and no one followed.