Published October 24, 2012
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141,312 Literary Works • 674,342 Reviews
Nice Poem, but you really need to be careful for verb tense.Plus, you need to make the verb agree with the subject. Furthermore, you need to read books so that you enhance... It's very interesting though!
Keep Writing,
Chris
So one of the lines in your poem doesnt quite make sense to me.
'The curse is hard to break, (Okay nothing wrong)
Mysterious as the darkness inside your heart, (Once again nothing wrong)
That will always turning around you?
Maybe 'That will always be turning you around?' 'That will always turn you around?'
Secondly it needs more motion more feel put into it. If you didnt cry writing this, youre readers wont cry reading it. Has to have feeling, experience, actual thought put into it.
Other than that, it was good.
Keep Writing! Hawinay
REALLY?OH,I'M SO SORRY ABOUT IT.ANYWAY,THANKS FOR THE REVIEW.ITS REALLY HELP ME:)