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Hey there Nafa, and welcome to YWS.

Soft, white flakes fell to from a grey sky, coating the landscape in a milky blanket. The snow cover remained unperturbed save for the set of footprints and the splattering of crimson liquid next to them.

Nice descriptive start.

“No harm? Are you insane? You just killed those two Mutasi without even blinking!” her voice trembled as she spoke and she pressed further into the tree, as if she could become one with it.

But those two Mutasi were after her, and plan to take her in. So why is she worked up over the man for killing those creatures and saving her life? Would she much rather prefer for those creatures to take her in captive? Such a stupid thing to get angry about.

He didn’t elaborate, and before she had a chance to ask him what he meant, he pulled back the curtains that lead into one of the largest trees she had ever seen. It had to be a good forty feet wide. On the inside of the tree it was like a house, around the trunk of it were stairs that lead up to another park of the trunk. The area she and Mzhail were at now seemed to be a meeting hall of sorts. There was a very long table made out of dark gray wood and at the very end sat a light-green skinned man. His hair was dark green and his dark pink eyes were alert with curiosity as he watched her.

I think this is where your description started to falter. First of all, the transition from Arin and Mzhail talking to Mzhail leading Arin back to his home happens all of a sudden and is rushed. Just pull back a certain and bam, they are at Mzhail's home.

So Mizhail's home is inside a grand tree, but I'm just not feeling this grand tree being a save haven for a tribe of people. Could you describe the tree more? What sort of tree is it? How grand is it? What does the exterior look like? How does Arin react to something that grand? I just want to get this imagine in my mind that this indeed is a grand tree that can house a tribe inside.

Now, one of the things I love about reading fantasy is seeing what culture and lifestyle people had in various parts of the world. Have you ever traveled to another place in the world, to a place you've never been before? What are the first things you'll pick up on? Say it was my first time visiting France, I would pick up on the clothes that they wear, the architecture of the city, what shops do they have and what they sell, the way people behaved and treated one another, the various things and places that they have there that you won't find back where you live, the cultural lifestyle of the place, etc etc.

All those beautiful details which shows a lot about the culture and lifestyle of your tribe is completely non existent in your descriptions, which I was quite disappointed about, as I was interested in knowing what this tribe is about. Let's quickly brainstorm some ideas. You mentioned a hall right, but was the hall decorated with tribal artwork depicting things like the history of the tribe, or their beliefs, or some of their fables and legends? What about the people inside the tree? What was the lifestyle like in there? Are there any shops? What sort of things do they sell? If they don't sell stuff, then what else do they do in their tribe? Do they worship? Tell stories? Do they conduct research in magic and herbal medicine?

Overall impressions:

You have some solid descriptive skills, and I quite enjoyed reading this, so thanks for the read. I quite liked the way you described some of the beasts in this world, and having the story start off with the beasts hunting her down was quite satisfying, and does a good job at showing to the reader as to what the plot is about. I've already mentioned how quickly that scene transitions to the scene at Mzhail's home. Those two scenes feel very disjointed right now, and you should consider bridging the two scenes more during your editing. I've also mentioned that you need to consider the culture and lifestyle of your tribe more, and work on making your tribe feel alive and rich with history and purpose.

What I have yet to mention which I'll do so briefly is Arin as a character. I like the idea that she's a fleeing slave, and that her mum sacrificed herself so that she could live her own life. She has potential, and I'm interested to see how her character will develop, but at the moment she seems bland. We don't have a good idea of what her personality is like. Throughout this chapter, she simply have her reacting to what's happening in the story rather than have her be part of the story. We also don't know much about her background. You could say that her background will be revealed in the latter chapters, but I've always believed that strong character development is spread throughout a novel. In the first chapter, you should be laying the groundwork for it. And by the way, what was up with Arin yelling at Mzhail for saving his life? Those beasts wanted to take her captive, and she's just like "Na, screw you for just saving my life." That makes a lot of sense doesn't it?

Anyways, I hope this review helped. Keep up the good work.
Andy.

P.S: I just came up with a plot hole in the chapter after submitting the review. Why is Mzhail willing to take her in? If she's being hunted down, then wouldn't it put the entire tribe at risk if he takes her in? Something to think about.

Hello there!

Dreamy here for a short review. I liked how you started your scene and the your description had this poetic uncertainty. Most of the time, I didn't understand/follow what you were trying to say, maybe its just me. I thought, you could maybe take things slow. Because, it got lot of actions, someone's doing something or the other. And I believe there were few slow transformations, at times like this, make sure you are clear in what you are trying to say. Pick right words and focus on one character at a time and then you can gradually, eventually increase the numbers of characters in a paragraph. Too many makes it look like a info dumb which is clumsily packed.

And for some nitpicks,

Soft, white flakes fell to from a grey sky, coating the landscape in a milky blanket. The snow cover remained unperturbed save for the set of footprints and the splattering of crimson liquid next to them.

Did you mean form ?

revealing skin such a dark blue it appeared to be black and blood seeping

Were you intending to be confused? Because, it sure did confuse me. xD

As it moved, the woman could

in an expression of pain and his eyes turned shocked

You should re-word it. Other wise it reads weird.

But other than that. I liked what you got here. With few more edits and re-words, this can be made into a cool book. So, keep up your good work!

Keep writing!

Cheers!