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Young Writers Society



Syrenia: Part 2 "Lies and Forgiveness"

by Mythmon


Note: This is a pretty direct continuation of Part 1, so you should read that first. Its not very long. http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic32787.html

Lies and Forgiveness

...After the feeling of the teleport had passed, Malik opened his eyes to see Derrick standing beside Cassy against the backdrop of the Seattle skyline. Jessica quickly dropped Malik's hand, it had been necessary for the teleport, but holding it longer would give the others ideas.

The four of them were on top of the building that Malik lived on. In their first time together, Derrick had learned that building tops tended to be very private, so no one would notice his sudden comings and goings. Derrick walked solemnly towards Malik, offering his hand for a shake. Malik took it with equal seriousness. After a second, Derrick pulled him into a massive bear-hug, which Malik returned without missing a beat. “Nice to see you haven't blown your self up yet, man.” Derrick said as he released Malik.

“Of course I haven't blown my self up, and you? I'm surprised you haven't fallen off one of your precious roofs yet,” Malik retorted with a grin.

Beside them, Jessica and Cassy exchanged looks of exasperation. They were mind-talking, about what Malik could guess: 'boys, always so immature'. He turned towards Cassy and offered her a hug. She ignored him and turned to Derrick. “So are you going to tell us what this is all about, or not?” she said impatiently to Derrick.

With a sigh Malik awkwardly dropped his arms. She hasn't forgiven you. Jessica told him gently

So I've gathered. I had hoped that she would had realized there was nothing I could have done by now, but I guess not.

“Alright, alright. We have everyone here, time to explain, I guess...” Derrick began awkwardly. He scratched his head and began. “Well, you see, its about Jefry. I think I found him,” he glanced at Cassy, who had suddenly taken interest. Jefry had been the fifth person in the group that the Teachers had brought together, so long ago. “They took him to a lab type thing. Its in New York. The state, not the city. I'm not sure where, exactly. I stumbled on it while I was looking for him, but I couldn't get close enough by myself to find out anything interesting.”

The wind blew silently across an almost empty roof top, stirring the hair of those that were there. “What are we waiting for?” Cassy quietly finally broke the silence, but no one joined her. Suddenly, surrounding them in every direction were duplicates of Cassy, each one wearing exactly the same look on her face. “Why are we just standing here?” The copies mimicked her slight phrase exactly, amplifying it to a violent roar, only audible to those she was showing the illusion to.

“You know its not that simple, Cassy.” Derrick started to explain gently He put a comforting hand on her shoulder “We all thought he was dead. Its a big thing to find out so suddenly.” As Derrick talked the copies started to disappear, one by one, until only the original Cassy was left. She pulled her shoulder away form Derrick's touch.

You should say something. Jessica prodded Malik with her mind. Don't just stand there.

Like what? 'I'm sorry that I am not jumping for joy to go risk my life to try and rescue your boyfriend who we all thought was dead and that you blame me for and still can't realize that it wasn't my fault?'

No, like you're glad we were wrong. Like you're glad that they didn't kill him. You're glad to get a chance to make up for what you did. And you are going to help, you don't have a choice. “Cassy, we're here to help. Thats why we came. We just need time to get a plan, so we are sure it works.” Jessica stepped forward and put her arms around Cassy, comforting her. An illusionary halo appeared above Jessica's head. Derrick and Malik were watching the two of them, so neither of them noticed the imaginary devil horns that appeared on Malik's head, but Jessica did. Her eyes narrowed and she glanced at Cassy. After a moment Jessica's gaze softened, and the horns faded away.

----------

Malik remembered when they had lost Jefry. They had been running from the Agents. They were almost away, but Jefry and Cassy had gotten trapped in one of the snares left by the Agency. Malik doubled back to help them, telling Derrick and Jessica that the three of them would catch up. He was able to free Cassy of her restraints in time. He started to help Jefry, but with Agents fast approaching, Jefry told Malik to leave him behind. It was better that one of them get away then both to be caught and, they had presumed, be tortured and killed. It pained Malik to leave his friend for dead, but he knew that Jefry was right.

Cassy never forgave Malik for that. She would have preferred him to die trying than to leave Jefry behind. The rest of the group realized that there was no way to save him, but Cassy was blinded by her passion. Malik wanted to talk to her, to comfort her, to explain the situation. But she wouldn't talk to him. In her mind, he saved her and didn't save Jefry. In her mind Malik was jealous of Jefry. In her eyes, Malik was trying to eliminate his competition. At least, that was what Malik thought. Jessica and Malik had kept their relationship secret, denying it anytime someone mentioned it. They worked well together, that was all, they said. They didn't feel comfortable letting the world know. Mind-talk provided them their secrecy. It also provided them with trust. Mind-talk made it extremely difficult to lie, and so Jessica and Malik could trust whatever the other said.

Jessica knew exactly what had happened from Malik's mind. Derrick simply trusted Malik. He didn't need proof that Malik had done everything he could have. The conflict remained between Malik and Cassy for the few short days until the group split, going back home, never to see each other again. At least that was the idea.

----------

Derrick had joined the hug, embracing the two girls. Get over here. An annoying bug in Malik's mind. He wasn't sure if it was Jessica thinking at him, or if it was her affect on his thoughts. Awkwardly, he joined Derrick, and wrapped his arms around the group. They stayed that way for a moment, before Jessica started to loosen everyone apart. While everyone was still touching, Malik tweaked his mind a bit, and sent a small electric shock through everyone, a pleasant tingle. Let them know he was in with anything they had to do. For better or worse.

“So whats the plan.” Malik had a determined tone in his voice. Now that he had decided he was in, he was all in. Everyone knew this. He was a stubborn person, once he started, there was no stopping him. This wasn't always a good thing, but this time his support even got Cassy to smile a little. Only a little. After that, it was back to her usual stony face, but now there was a angel and devil on her shoulder. Malik was sure that she was only showing them to him, to send a message. The devil appeared to be throttling an imitation of Malik, while the angel was just seething at it's copy. Small steps Malik thought to himself.

“Well, thats kind of why I got us all together. I think we should get some more information on the place he is in, and then make a plan from that. Jessie, if I can get you close enough to a guard, can you get some info from them?”

“I might be able to do more than that. Maybe.” Jessica's devilish grin was back. Derrick raised an eyebrow, but left it at that. Sometimes with Jessica, not knowing was better.

“Ok, good, and Cassy, you can help us get close enough by distracting the guards, and Malik... um...” For once, Derrick wasn't sure what to say, he never had been very familiar with the uses of Malik's talents.

“I can probably help with the security systems on the final approach. Maybe I can learn

something from some digital stuff around the perimeter - phones, cameras, stuff like that - if there are any. I'm not sure how much use I will be at first though. I will need to get some stuff from my house, and tell my parents I'll be gone, so they won't worry.”

“Fair enough. Need a jump down there?” Derrick offered. Having a teleporter for a friend came in handy at times.

“Sure, just down to the main entrance, I don't think you know the layout well enough to get me straight to my apartment, and its not far from the door.” Malik caught Jessica's eye, waited a moment, and then thought loudly, hoping she was listening. I have something for you, I'll get it while I'm inside. When we get a moment alone I'll give it to you.

As Malik took Derrick's hand in preparation for the jerk across space, he heard dimly in his mind I'll be looking forward to it. I might have something for you too... we will see. Malik had just enough time to swing around to see the slight smile on her face before the scene was replaced with that of the front door to his apartment building.

“I'll come up with you, so I know where it is. That way if we need to come back we can save time and go straight there.”

“Alright, but my mom doesn't like people in the house, so you will have to wait outside. No offense, not my rule.” Malik was making this up. He needed privacy to get Jessica's gift.

“No problem, man. My parents can be the same way sometimes.” Derrick followed him up the stairs to Malik's door.

As he unlocked his front door, Malik thought how he hated keeping secrets. He hated having to lie to his parents about why he wasn't going to be around for a few days, maybe weeks. He hated that he couldn't tell Derrick, who had been such a good friend during their months together, about him and Jessica. He hated hiding his skills from the world, for fear of being found by the Agency. He hated lies.

He gathered some things from his room. Some clothes. His laptop. Electrical tape. A coil of wire. His hacked iPod he had with him already. All this went into his bag. On his way out he grabbed some snacks and filled a water bottle in the kitchen. A goodbye to his dad, a hug for his mom. He made sure to leave them on a good note. He might not come back. Jefry had taught them that.

He almost forgot, Jessica's gift. He ran back to his room, and retrieved it. It was wrapped badly; Malik never was good at giving gifts. He had no idea why he had made it. They hadn't seen each other, hadn't talked for almost 6 months. They didn't plan to ever see each other again. They had agreed a distance relationship wouldn't work. He just had a compulsion to make something for her. So he did. It went in the bag too. He was careful to put it under some clothes, in a safe place that was hidden from prying eyes.

The bug in his head was back. What's taking so long. Jessica wasn't perfect, far from it in face. She could be impatient at times.

Just about done, just heading out the door now, see you in back on the roof top. “Alright Derrick, lets go get the girls and get out of here.” Malik said as he backed out the door. He turned around to see everyone already there. “Ah, I see you jumped them down here while I was away.”

“I got lonely. Though I do think we should return to the roof top, at least for now. We need some privacy.” Derrick took Cassy's hand, and offered his other to Malik in preparation for the teleport. “ We will need to plan things out, before we rush in blindly.”

“Wait, before we rush in blindly? Don't you mean so we don't rush in blindly?” Jessica corrected him.

“No, I mean before. We can plan all we want. We still have no idea what we are doing.” Most people would think this was a bad thing. But as they shifted from the hallway to the roof top, Derrick seemed like he couldn't be happier.

And that's part two. Comments welcome.

-Mike


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Fri Jul 18, 2008 11:51 pm
Stori wrote a review...



Here goes then.

Jessica quickly dropped Malik's hand, it had been necessary for the teleport, but holding it longer would give the others ideas.


That would work better as, "Jessica quickly dropped Malik's hand. It had been necessary for..."
The comma just makes the sentence longer and more awkward.

The four of them were on top of the building that Malik lived on.


Show, don't tell. Describe the setting.

Of course I haven't blown my self up, and you?


"Myself" is one word.

Well, you see, its about Jefry.

It's is what you meant: "It is about Jefry."

Derrick started to explain gently


You left out the period there. The same thing happened in the next sentence.

Malik remembered when they had lost Jefry. They had been running from the Agents. They were almost away, but Jefry and Cassy had gotten trapped in one of the snares left by the Agency. Malik doubled back to help them, telling Derrick and Jessica that the three of them would catch up. He was able to free Cassy of her restraints in time. He started to help Jefry, but with Agents fast approaching, Jefry told Malik to leave him behind. It was better that one of them get away then both to be caught and, they had presumed, be tortured and killed. It pained Malik to leave his friend for dead, but he knew that Jefry was right.


Again, show don't tell. And that's about it for my review.





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