don't you

by Myth-ology
  • April 5, 2007
  • Poetry
  • Other

This is just a poem I made up, so don't ban me from this forum.

don't you cough or i'll say p*** off
Don't call me thick or i'll call you a p****
Don't be a s*** or i'll call you a bitch!

don't ban me, cos this is just a poem

Comments & reviews · 4
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Android Comment
Android commented · Wed Apr 11, 2007 3:35 pm

umm...
Myth-ology, I think you need to see a psychiatrist.

1. This isn't a poem
2. Why are you swearing?
3. It is rubbish even if it is a poem

User avatar
Pyxis
Review
Pyxis wrote a review · Thu Apr 05, 2007 7:28 pm

This didn't seem serious.

Some reasons:

1. It was one sentence

2. Half of it was comprised of ***

3. It was not appropriate for children ages 2-5, but much too easy for anyone older than that.

:?

User avatar
Via
Review
Via wrote a review · Thu Apr 05, 2007 6:37 pm

Yea, I have to agree...I'm not entirely sure I'd call this is poem.

Foul language is actually acceptable in poetry, even on this forum. It needs to be given a proper rating and I believe that the foul language needs to fit into the piece....here I think you might be trying to model the piece around the language and to me that is not good.

Also, I must ask that you plz uz propr englsh whn typn and proper punctuation in your piece because if you don't then it becomes one long drawn out sentence that one must say aloud in one breath and it will cause a string of suffocation deaths due to lack of air to these readers who are simply innocent passerbyers and then you will get sued for murder and will get thrown in jail for years until you are old and bitter and you repeat this particular poem over and over again in your cell until you finally die of suffocation yourself from your one long runon piece of literature. Thanks.

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Nyconz421
Comment
Nyconz421 commented · Thu Apr 05, 2007 5:09 pm

I don't know if it's a poem really.... If it is though it's very angry.



Everything has to be taken on trust; truth is only that which is taken to be true. It's the currency of living. There may be nothing behind it, but it doesn't make any difference so long as it is honoured. One acts on assumptions. What do you assume?
— Player (Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead by Tom Stoppard)