I have denied myself an existence that relates to you,
Tales of tragedies that predate even you,
And the lore of "lived happily ever after" too,
In this time and beyond, I hereby denounce you,
Of undying love and loyalty unfathomable too,
As you become the emptiness, you didn’t see through,
Now I absolve myself of this one-sided love,
Of any promises and vows that I owe to you,
As I turn in to what you were once too,
-Myers
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Canary word: Present
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,857 Reviews
I love this!
The language is so beautiful, tragical and romantic at the same time. It has this classic feel to it wich personally find so pretty. Not that it is old fashioned more like timeless. I also feel like you have captured the feelings surrounding one-sided love extremely well. The words really touches you aswell and the lenght is perceft so you don't get tired of it. However I agree with some others in the comment section about the fact that some full stops would could be a good idea!
This is my first review so I am sorry if it is a little short and messy. But hope it can help and engourage you to keep up with the great writing that you are doing!
Thank you so much!
I have other poems in my profile and I'd love to have your say on them as well.
Every review is like a new hope for me
Your welcome! I%u2019d be glad to check out your other work.
Great!
Have you written poems for a long time or is it a relatively new interest? Just wondering because I think you are very talented
Thank you :')
I have been writing poems in my native language for a couple of years now. Though I am not a learned poet, I just picked it up on my way. English poetry is relatively new.
Hello.
So I have to say that the tittle and the words of what it was about in the poetry section was what first drew me in. The first line was really good and it made me want to keep reading which is something that every work should do by being able to draw the reader in. There is a few things in the poem that stood out to me in a way. So the first two lines of the poem end with the word you. This seemed a little repetitive which may have messed with the flow a little. The end rhyme seems to go throughout the poem from something that rhymes with you such as through and then the word too so the rhyme schemes I thought worked well there. I really loved the ending and how it kinda tied in the poem but like started it over at the same time as you were showing that going from liking someone and them not liking you back to switching roles and I thought that worked really well. I also liked the spacing in the beginning and end and how it seemed strategicaly pleasing to the eye in how the shorter liner are ore to the middle. The punctuation and grammar was good but I almost wish you would have used a few periods or maybe put just one period at the end of the poem. It was overall really good and definently captured the meaning of one sided love. Thankyou so much from writing I hope to be able to read some more of your work and review it soon.
Thank you so much!
I really enjoy when someone is able to get the idea behind any of my work.
Now that you have mentioned it, I noticed that it really is repetitive in the first two lines.
Yes, I am yet to grasp the skills of punctuation in poetry, and I think it may take me some time.
I do have other poems in profile, I would like to see what you think about those.
Thank you again
Hello! Here's a short review for you:
The poem is full of emotion. My interpretation is that the protagonist of the poem stopped to think about a delusional relationship and with reluctant but lucid honesty decided it's time to move on.
I feel like there are a lot of different feelings in here, and not just sadness (for example I catch a little tinge of bitterness together with dry determination).
You beautifully captured the different shades of a breakup.
I would have put a full stop instead of the commas at the end of the third and sixth verse.
Great writing
That's exactly what I meant it to be. Thank you for the review
Great interpretation!