Ode To My Girlfriends Fish

by Mr.SpaceMan

Published September 26, 2011

It glides by my eyes with a flash of colour,
It's wisdom only shown through the blankness of it's features,
It's silence is the loudest noise, the strongest opinion and
It's size gives the world a perspective that makes it's wisdom unique.

Hiding from the others it stays in the back.
Feeling rushed, it can only relax whenever it's at it's busiest.
Hiding from itself it focuses itself on the others.
Feeling calm, it gets absorbed in them.

The other colours, the other shapes,
The other sizes, and the other lives,
The other problems, and the other solutions,
The other levels of consciousness, sharing the same earthly pleasures.

it glides by my eyes with a flash of colour,
it's wisdom only shown through the blankness of it's features.
Others do not see what I see in him.
Others can not love him like how I love him.
For he's just Oscar, Oscar the Algae eater.

Comments & reviews · 3
User avatar
RileyJ
Review
RileyJ wrote a review Review · Oct 1, 2011

I actually really enjoyed this piece. I think you did a marvelous job with taking something trivial and writing about it so elegantly. What's really interesting is how you manage to keep in mind that this IS something trivial, without the poem being pointless. Really good job, very fun read.

User avatar
Deanie
Review
Deanie wrote a review Review · Sep 30, 2011

Hey.

This was a nice poem and liked reading it. I wasn't sure if I would get it because I didn't know what ode meant but in the end I understood it.

I can't see anything wrong with it, and I think my favourite verse was the last one. It had an okay opening and a pretty good ending. It was enjoyable to read. Good job.

Deanie x

User avatar
briggsy1996
Review
briggsy1996 wrote a review Review · Sep 26, 2011

Hi there,
This was amusing to read. It's simplicity was what made it a good piece of writing, so for that I congratulate you. Everything seems to be in order aside from:

It's size gives the world a perspective that makes it's wisdom is unique.

-I think you've added an extra 'is'
Other than that, this was well written and overall very enjoyable. I had a good laugh!
Happy Writing :)
-Briggsy



"Storybooks and roleplays are just for fun!" To which I say: of course! But why only "just"? Sometimes fun is found in the full-send. Sometimes fun is found in taking it seriously, and aiming to do it with excellence!
— soundofmind