Published February 11, 2026
Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for mature content.
Hello, Hello Folks! I wasn't going to rewrite this poem, but I feel the upcoming changes needed to be reflected a bit more. With that being said lets get into it after these Trigger warnings.
Tw: Tw: Self-destructive tendencies, toxic romances, references to wounds, hanging and death. As well as references to religious themes.
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I am human, and there are few things born into us, like sacrifice.
We grovel at it like an altar.
Some of it for the greater good, some of it to keep the peace.
That's what we tell ourselves because we are human.
We lie at this altar, and I am no different.
The versions you wanted, the changes I made and worshipped.
Have long since hung from rotted ankles and fraying string.
After all, needless trials do not make a martyr.
But a girl ripping pieces of herself to be loved like a game.
Perhaps if I pack my wounds with white aster, it won't be one doomed to fail
All this was to be patron saint with the taste of lilies on her lips.
Both flesh and soul given up to be kissed again while your rope tightened.
My ghosts cling to clarity like the scoundrels sent to the gallows.
Every fragment I was meant to watch over, stain the valley as they sway against your whims.
Regrets and copper-coated petals beg long swallowed questions stuck in skeletal throats.
Would I shed myself once more for a guide?
Re-thread my grovelling bones and smouldering skin into that of Virgil.
In search of paradise, I found Inferno in you, sweet and stinging.
Life is one Divine comedy, for we are human.
And there are, few things born into me, like sacrifice.
-Lilian's Personal Journal: Readings and Responses.
*Entrance into Hell's royal archive still pending over unclear post-mortem approval despite the continued requests of his Second Highness.
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( Sorry if the banners in this look a bit bare bones, my orignal plan didnt work out so I had to change things.)
Prologue summary: The unnamed Empress of Hell has a meeting with her old friend Fate over an old archived journal. However, the reasoning for wanting such a thing isn’t as straightforward as it seems once Fate is questioned both her motives and what it means for the land of Hell. The fact that it would be given to tempt a human only raises old tensions, as it’s clear this is in part a way to step into the Empress and Emperor's mortal affairs, where Fate would not be welcomed. Mostly due to fact, no human alive could read the dead language it’s written in. However, the small coven the Emperor runs would have an english recreation.
The debate this realization kicks off goes from sneaky digs and shows of paranormal power to a physical encounter that draws blood. All while a storm brews in the background, leaving the Empress with the rain and this haunting last line.
“I expected you to know by now that change isn’t simply good nor bad.”
Hi Moth! In a time that feels so long ago I reviewed some of your everbound chapters. In the coming weeks I may end up taking another look and following along!
For now, I hope this review on this poem helps!
First off, the graphic here is super cool! I feel like it fits the “aesthetic” of Everbound very well. I see you also flipped the image here, since this is the “reversed” hangman.
Looking into the meanings of the hanged man when reversed there are all types of horrible things to come for Lillian, who I assume this is referring to.
If I am to take the meaning of the card literally, she is making or will make impulsive decisions to distract herself from her own discontent. Hanged Man reversed is overall just all BAD NEWS so for a story that might be leaning into dark themes, this is a great and symbolic tarot to use!
If I’m not mistaken, a lot of this poem is referring to her partner, Pandora, who left her. I could be very wrong lol but I fet a very yearning feeling from all these lines. Lillian tried to change herself, but all it did was destroy her. The wordplay used here evokes the very tendons snapping from her ankles. I love it!
Again, going into sacrificing oneself for another’s love. She was literally being hanged, and was willing to give it up (possibly unknowingly) for just one kiss.
An interesting reference to Virgil and Dante’s Inferno here! I like the allusion to Virgil. I think she is saying something along the lines of she needs her “Dante” to act as Virgil.
❀ Closer ❀
I have taken some ganders at your rewritten chapters of Everbound and they look great! I think I will be checking them out down the line!
Hey there, the Rebel's here as your Valentine Reviewer! But that epithet is probably the literal opposite of your poem here. I haven't read the original poem, so I am coming in blind -- I am sorry if any details are glossed over because of that. Below is my stanza-by-stanza reaction and analysis of your poem. Really cool artwork btw.
An introduction about the meaning of humanity in free verse with tone-based poetry. The narrator of the poem feels that sacrifice is a core essence of being human but paradoxically implies that we simply use that thought for whatever morally right action that we do, to justify the sacrifice itself. The imagery of the altar was pretty unique.
Now I just noticed that every line ends with a full stop/period for some reason. Is it a deliberate choice to imply a 'final' sort of tone to read the poem in? Even if so, the enjambment of the second and third lines don't quite work if you do it that way. I find the lack of full stop/period in the last line even more bizarre. You have your poetic license, of course---It's a bit weird in a conventional sense, that's all.
Anyway. So, the narrator of the poem is talking with some 'you' about how the former sacrificed herself over and over again for the 'you', but in vain, as it doesn't 'make [them] a martyr'. The symbolism of the white aster (I wasn't aware about it, so I had to google it up) is interesting as it is juxtaposed between (quite literally) rot and sacrifice, as a metaphor for purity and innocence. Maybe it denotes the loss of innocence and revivification of the sacrifice over and over again?
With just a cursory glance, this seems to be the climax of the poem. This is my interpretation, which, once again, might be wrong: the narrator has been tortured and tormented and violated and deflowered (...oh... white aster...) over and over and over and over again. They have either died or have started to blame themselves for being the 'sacrifice' (or both) to the tightening rope. They apparently were supposed to 'watch over' something and failed, which led to some sort of disaster or series of death and may be the cause for their present condition. Once again, not sure, this is just my interpretation. Also, the final couple of lines are hauntingly beautiful.
The narrator compares themselves to Dante's Virgil in Divine Comedy, serving as a 'guide' to some sort of mission (...?) or to the referred 'you' in the poem. Perhaps, it is just a mental defense mechanism born of torture and horror. And the final line refers back to the metaphor of sacrifice that was introduced in the first stanza. A beautiful, yet terrifying, ending.
Hello there, Moth! I'm reviewing using the YWS S'more Method today!
Shalt we commence with the cursed S’more?
Top Graham Cracker - This is a rewrite of The Hanged Man poem, which I think you wrote back in…2023? I don’t know if I remember that date, but it’s a rewrite of that poem and in turn, a new way to look at your story.
Slightly Burnt Marshmallow - Hmm…I have no recommendations to make as of right now, but if you would like to edit this, you may.
Chocolate Bar - I love that the narrator talks about beautiful things like “lilies” as if she wants to be pure, but then the “copper petals” like it’s choking her. Because it is. It’s romanticizing the horrors of life, in a way, because to imagine it as something beautiful makes it feel better. The Hanged Man in a tarot card usually symbolizes an open mind, but reversed, its meaning changes to that of uncertainty. This is reflected in the images and words of the poem, which reads like a lullaby that chokes.
Closing Graham Cracker - Overall, a very lovely rewrite of the poem! I enjoyed reading this and I can’t wait to read more of what you will rewrite. This story has trapped me just like Fate has trapped so many others and so…
I wish you an amazing day/night! ^v^
Hello Feverdreams! You are as quick on the draw as always, and oh my, I really did post the og in 2024 feels like just yesterday.
I am so glad the deeper imagery and little bits of personality come through. I wanted to really walk the line between presenting the inkling of trying to hold onto the past through romanticizing it and the reflection that you to see it may be hurting you.
It's also nice to see folks connecting the tarot to the poem (choosing and weaving them in can get so tricky, as each one can hold so many meanings). Not that I can complain, I keep collecting decks lol
All in all, I know it's been a slow reading process, but oh boy, I got a few things up in store for both these rewrites and the further chapters. Ehiterway, I think it will be a big but good change, that is, if Fate allows.
Thank you for the kind words, and I hope to return the favour this Review Day!
You%u2019re welcome ^v^