She had to love this stranger. He was the most familiar face in the crowd. She knew that from the begging. It was like her very soul was eternally obligated to love him. As he was approaching her, she looked at him and smiled. Her smile was just an idea slightly lifting the corners of her full lips emerging from some kind of hope that he could love her some day. She never found out after all. She closed her eyes slightly like she had the need to feel every inch of her body, the movement of the blood in her veins and the tainted air filling her lungs.She made no sound, just stood there motionless like she could hear a musical tone as her tears made their way to her cheek bones. And she thought to herself. "If tears had a sound it would be some sweet melancholy trying to cover the bitterness of grief." It is hard sometimes to reminisce. But she did. She recalled every single thing he ever told her one by one. But first of all the rainy evening, those were so rare in Greece and that's what made them so beautiful.She recalled the scent of the misty dirt and the flowering trees, she remembered the sunshine that briefly escaped from the clouds to warm her face. The discreet shades of the trees and of course the people. Distant and narrow minded as always, all of them happy, cheerful. It was Christmas after all. They were drinking their morning coffee in the coffee shop under acropolis as always. "Christmas is not a good time for the lonely" she thought and laughed.
He had been staring at her silently all morning with great devotion
"So what's her name?" he asked out of nowhere
"What?" She said and her tone seemed confused
"Your daughter's name" he caught her unprepared again.. She paused for a while looking down.
"How do you know it's a daughter" she never mentioned the child's gender.
"It is scientifically proved that beautiful women have daughters" he smiled in a childish manner that made her wonder why she couldn't smile like that anymore.
"Zoe" she said and looked down. She seemed lost. He wondered if she would cry. But he didn't touch her nor attempted to hug her. He couldn't. He couldn't embrace a creature as hurt as herself. He was afraid that she might break. He was afraid that he would break with her. They were so fragile and yet so sharp. Like pieces of broken glass. He had to keep himself safe for the girl who was waiting for him at home. He wouldn't allow himself to be anyone else's. That's why he was afraid of her, almost shocked looking in an awe. Because she owned him. Even if he never offered himself to her. Even if she never tried to take him in the first place. He was hers. A part of him would always be with her and he felt like he wasn't whole before her. Never in his life had he seen someone so similar to him. Identical to him. For a moment he felt fear, the kind of fear that always accompanies the inability to explain things in life that could be of great importance. Maybe the answer was in the mirror between them. Besides, how can you embrace your own reflection?
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Thank you very much for your kind words and your review
I know the story is insignificant at many points and this is simply because it's not a short story but a part from my last book... I couldn't upload all of it because it is too long to translated in english I can though add some more details to that
I'm a tad bit confused...was she talking to her reflection all along- her reflection is a man? I think that was a bit confusing at the end.
Who knows? Maybe this could develop into a novelette or novel.
Great concept though. I have to admit, your opening lines raptured me:
"She had to love this stranger. He was the most familiar face in the crowd"
You have a lot of typos though and a bit of grammar errors:
She 'stood' there motionless like she could here a musical tone as her tears made their way to her cheek bones
Also, you could but her thoughts in italics maybe?
'bittery' should probably be bitter/ness or you could make use of another word
When you said, "It is hard sometimes to recall" you fell from consistency in your tense.
"She recalled the rainy evevning, it was so rare in Greece"=She recalled the rainy evening (typos); those were so rare in Greece.
"sun shines", sunshine or do you wish to say sun rays?
There were other corrections but I think you get it, watch out for those typos.
I absolutely love the male character and I look forward to reading the edited version
Keep writing!
Yes I know it is because I tried to translated from greek to english and it was hard since the words didn't seem to fit. And the mirror between them symbolyses the characteristics they have in common. And how she could see herself in him.
Thank you very much for your comment