Untitled (Prologue)

So this doesn't exactly belong in the sci-fi place...but it doesn't exactly belong here. I guess we'll figure out where it goes...But for now...this goes here. If anyone has any ideas for the title, please PM me. :D

Prologue:

Nobody is sure how this happened, but, unfortunately, it DID happen. Many people believe it's aliens. Stupid, stupid people. My theory is that this happened because somebody was buried in the "Pet Sematary" and came back to life with no soul. Just like in some kind of weird horror movie, based off of a Stephen King book.

My name is Valentina Evans. I am 14 years old. I've been surviving for the past year and a half. I am, in fact, alone. All I know for sure, is that this is not the end.

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kaitlyn
Review
kaitlyn wrote a review · Thu Feb 10, 2022 5:17 am

Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!

Anyway let's get right to it,

Nobody is sure how this happened, but, unfortunately, it DID happen. Many people believe it's aliens. Stupid, stupid people. My theory is that this happened because somebody was buried in the "Pet Sematary" and came back to life with no soul. Just like in some kind of weird horror movie, based off of a Stephen King book.

My name is Valentina Evans. I am 14 years old. I've been surviving for the past year and a half. I am, in fact, alone. All I know for sure, is that this is not the end.


Okayy..well this is certainly quite something here. For starters, this well, I don't quite know what to feel on this one. On one hand, despite its rather small size it oddly enough seems to be presenting a proper full idea to us...and yet despite that, I get the feeling that there should be something more here so I'm a bit of a hard time deciding if this piece feels complete or not.

The other thing is this first paragraph and second paragraph while both being quite interesting in their own right ends up sounding ever so slightly disjointed from each other and that's not a good sign for a prologue. Its not that they seem completely unrelated, it just feels like there's a missing paragraph there that's meant to bridge this gap.

Overall however, it is still certainly enough to get your attention and make you want to read more. Its just that there's those few nagging things there which then make it a little bit more questionable that perhaps it ought to be here. So a bit of a look at that would be helpful.

Aaaaand that's it for this one.

As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.

Stay Safe
Harry

User avatar
Misguided Comment

Well thank you. I'll definitely take that into consideration. Well I was planning something else, like the chapters to bounce from the present day, to the past, like flashbacks. And "what happened" would come slowly to the readers.



In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell, nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat: it was a hobbit-hole, and that means comfort.
— JRR Tolkien