Void absenceV1They say a bird can’t fly with broken wings,
there’s no thunder without lightning;
no life exists without the sun,
only the darkness lives on.
V2They say no blood would course through your veins
if it wasn’t for the air you breathe,
but all I feel is empty electricity,
the current flowing away from life.
ChorusBecause when you’re away
I’m just a body with no soul,
I decay a little more each day.
It’s like over me
the mountains are crashing
and drowning into the sea,
falling helplessly
in your void absence.
V3I’m buried in a long winter’s snow,
you return like the awaited spring time,
my heart blossoms up again –
no longer lonely and cold.
V4Take hold of my numb hand once more,
send your love radiating through me
‘cause I’ve missed you like the rain
in the dry Saharan desert.
BridgeThere’s an earthquake in my heart when you’re gone,
but I’m no longer crying tears.
Glaciers melt and flood my world
and I’m drowning into the sea,
falling helplessly, helplessly…
Chorus (x2)EndTake hold of my numb hand once more,
send your love radiating through me;
you, to me, are like summer:
you give me butterflies.
MIKSTER.
I just read it. And I love it.
What's empty electricity feel like? D: I'm not quite sure what it is. BUT. I did love the tie between the first two verses with the electricity/lightning thing. Dunno if that was planned, but it was really awesome. 8D
I'm kind of kicking this metaphor back and forth. It's a bit different from the rest of your metaphors. This one doesn't compare to a significant absence -- just destruction. But, I mean. the metaphor works here, it's just different from the rest of the song. I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing though, which is why I'm just rambling and making no sense right now i'mgoigntomoveonnowsorry.
Actually, that's all I have. xD!
The title seemed a bit redundant since void is absence. It sounds cool, but I don't know how effective it is.
Also, it'd be cool if the ending verse had some tie-back to electricity or a current flowing through the speaker. Or something. I dunno, just something that ties in with the rest of the song!
Your imagery is absolutely stunning -- those metaphors were very divine. They all shared the same meaning with a similar nature-esque quality. So awesome.
Beautiful job. <3
Keep writing!
Jabber, the One and Only!
Is it just me, or you are AMAZING in writing songs!
I couldn't find any grammatical mistakes (I think...), so I'm only going to say KEEP IT UP!
Send me more of your work please!
Lili