A Feverish Nightmare

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As I look out the window, I only see darkness, illuminated by the streetlights and some of the appartment lights that were still on, no signs of men in raincoats. It must be the fever again. "Honey, there is no one out there. Try to get some sleep." I say as I close the curtains again.
"It wasn't a man daddy. It was...it was..."

She was rolling from side to side in her bed. Definitely the fever again. "Get some rest honey, it will do you good. If you need anything I'll be here in a second." I kissed her forehead, it was still hot, but colder than yesterday.

 

I make my way towards my bed and yawn. At the other side of the bed, Bev is already sleeping again. It's time I get some rest too, or I'll be the next one to get ill. I lay down and roll towards my wife. "was she much trouble?" Bev asks me; apparently not sleeping. "No. Just a feverish nightmare I guess. If she starts screaming again it's your turn." "Fair enough." she says and rolls towards me. "g'night hun". "g'night." I give her a small kiss and close my eyes.

 

Another scream wakes me up with my eyes wide open. This wasn't a scream like the one my daughter let out earlier this night. I look at the alarmclock; 3:08. "Your turn Bev." I say with a sigh. No answer. "Bev?" Another scream sounds through the house, piercing through doors, walls and my flesh. That was not Sophie screaming; it was Beverly.

 

I quickly look beside me to confirm what I already know: her side of the bed is empty. I send the sheets flying off of me and quickly make my way towards my daughter's bedroom. "Honey? Darling are you al-" When I open the door I first see my wife standing in the corner of the bedroom, looking terrified in the direction of my daughter's bed. My eyes shoot to the same direction. What I see there makes my skin crawl and sweat gushes from all over my body in a fingersnap.

 

A very tall man in a raincoat stands beside my daughter's bed. He is holding my 10 year-old daughter in one arm in a cradling position and his other arm is waiting above her sleeping head. His hand is significantly bigger than my daughter's head. The man stands in a strange ready-to-jump position. But what exactly is he doing with his other arm? I look from my daughter to the giant and back to my daughter. "What are y- Who a- Why-" I'm trying to utter all the questions that pop into my mind all at once and weak noises are all that escape my mouth. I cannot see his face. The giant is wearing a big hat that covers his eyes. The only thing that I can see is a big wide grin that shows almost all of the man's crooked, yellowing teeth. I faintly feel the breeze from the open window that I looked out of earlier this night.

 

My wife's legs have given out and she now sits in the corner, looking at the giant and tears running over her cheeks. "Who are you!" I yell franticly at the giant. "Hush now little man, y'don't wanna wake up yer little girl d'you?" The giant growls back at me, but muted. It did not calm me one bit.

 

I realize that this man could do whatever he wanted to do with my little girl. "What do you want with my daughter." I say franticly but with less sound, almost whispering and my eyes widening. "Hmmm, y'don't wanna hear that answer little man." He says, and he licks his teeth in an animalistic way. My heart drops and my stomach rises. My legs and arms start trembling and I hear my wife wailing. She probably got the same picture in her mind: He's going to rape my daughter.

 

"Put my daughter down, right now." I wanted to sound tough, but my voice was trembling. The giant only starts laughing, but his laugh ends in a painful sound. His skin turns colour: It is turning green! There's also a sound. A sound like the skin of an orange that's peeled, but louder, the sound fills the room. Fear makes me unable to move.
 

The giant launches a nervous laugh, he's definitely in pain. He straightens up and twists his neck. He looks at the window. I look at the window too, knowing what he thinks, but I am too late to act. The monster turns toward the window and jumps through head first, taking the frame with it. I run to the window and see the monster running away, still holding my daughter.

 

I run for the door, the stairs, another door, through the kitchen, through the living room, through the front door, to the street. But I'm too late. I cannot see the giant or my daughter anywhere. Panting I fall to my knees in nothing but my boxershorts and a shirt. I look down to my hands, the hands that did not try to save my precious Sophie, while I hear my wife screaming from the bedroom window.   

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manisha
Review
manisha wrote a review · Thu Mar 15, 2012 5:17 pm

hey!

that was a definite horror story and your avatar really adds to the effect.
I am reading this at 11 in the night and I dont think i am going to get any sleep as theres a window right across my bedroom.
you did a good job on the daunting aspect. I like the way you have used the father as the protagonist as i wasnt expecting that at the start.
but it does leave me a bit confused.
who is the giant??
was he really going to rape the daughter? he dosnt come across as an human then what is he??
its good to have suspense in a story but to leave a reader fustrated as to know what happened isnt a good tool unless your planning ona next chapter.
maybe adding a bit more story to it will do great.


There's also a sound. A sound like the skin of an orange that's peeled

what sound excatly does an orange being peeled makes??


The giant launches a nervous laugh, he's definitely in pain

why is he in pain??
Later on you call the giant a monster. Do you mean that literally? or is the father just referring to the man like that.
On the whole it was a good read. i enjoyed it as you have a really good style of writing and an author can pull off anything with just that.
Congratulations on that!

Keep writing.

Hope that helped.

-manisha



Stop being mean to your self-insert character, you're just being mean to yourself.
— WeepingWisteria