Fire burns. Consumes all.
Overtakes everything in its path.
Makes you do crazy things.
Makes you believe.
Fire crackles. Loud and proud.
Shows the world it’s not afraid.
Makes you feel happy.
Makes you believe.
Fire spits. Damages you.
Hurts and breaks and shatters.
Makes you wish it had never come.
Makes you believe.
Fire exists. Just like hope.
Gives you faith, yet you are vulnerable.
Makes you stronger yet weaker.
Makes you believe.
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Happy Review Day! So then, let's get into it.
There are some nice choices here. I like how you illustrated the difference between the positive and negative stanzas through the right and left alignment. I really like how "makes you believe" takes on multiple different meanings as the poem progresses.
I think this is a poem about... well, I'm not sure that there is a good word for it. Passion comes close, but not quite. Strong emotions, anyway.
I definitely relate to it, in ways too personal to get into. It stirred up some emotion in me thinking about the times I've wished it never came.
Normally I raise objection to a rhyme in a non-rhyming poem, but that's when it's done unintentionally. "Loud and proud" works here, especially because it's all within one line.
There is one small thing that I'm going to criticize here, but it's something I can't figure out how I would even fix myself! You set up a lovely rhythm with the first two stanzas and again in the fourth where the first line is short, the second line is long, the third line is medium-length, and the last line is the shortest.
Especially when you're reading it out loud, the third stanza sticks out as not matching this rhythm. However, I don't know how I would fix it besides making the second line even longer than the third, which might not be advisable.
Overall I liked this, and I apologize for my clumsy interpretation of the meaning!
Hello! Catsz here to leave a quick review before I wrap up today, maybe gaining a few points for the Berry Cool Crew!
This looks like a very interesting poem! Let’s dive into it!
The title is eye catching. The one word, fire, can symbolize so many things, besides the physical disaster. Sometimes it can dance in waves, looking strangely, eerily beautiful, yet leaves destruction in its path. That’s my take on what you’ll write about!
Also, I love the layout. It is very creative, and it gives off the vibe of fire spreading around the page!
The first stanza gets you straight to the point; fire is manipulative, leaving shriveled death where it treks. It reminds us that some humans are like fire. They deceive you, and like you said in the poem, makes you listen, makes you believe it’s sweet lies.
Fire can be such a beautiful thing, yet can break open the world’s cracks. I love the repeating, “makes you believe,” line. It emphasizes the importance of finding a deeper meaning through this!
It’s like manipulative people. The devil, in a way. At first, it welcomed you with open arms, full of sweet and purrs, but soon, it deceives you until you cannot recognize who you’ve become.
The last stanza is especially powerful. The short sentences, and the last line really hits the reader hard in the stomach.
This poem is gorgeously haunting, and I enjoyed it so much! Even though it’s short, it carried an impactful meaning.
As of right now, I don’t have any advice, except to continue your amazing works and finding depth in everything you do and see and touch! Keep going, my friend. Happy writing!
~catsz
Hello! Catsz here to leave a quick review before I wrap up today, maybe gaining a few points for the Berry Cool Crew!
This looks like a very interesting poem! Let’s dive into it!
The title is eye catching. The one word, fire, can symbolize so many things, besides the physical disaster. Sometimes it can dance in waves, looking strangely, eerily beautiful, yet leaves destruction in its path. That’s my take on what you’ll write about!
Also, I love the layout. It is very creative, and it gives off the vibe of fire spreading around the page!
The first stanza gets you straight to the point; fire is manipulative, leaving shriveled death where it treks. It reminds us that some humans are like fire. They deceive you, and like you said in the poem, makes you listen, makes you believe it’s sweet lies.
Fire can be such a beautiful thing, yet can break open the world’s cracks. I love the repeating, “makes you believe,” line. It emphasizes the importance of finding a deeper meaning through this!
It’s like manipulative people. The devil, in a way. At first, it welcomed you with open arms, full of sweet and purrs, but soon, it deceives you until you cannot recognize who you’ve become.
The last stanza is especially powerful. The short sentences, and the last line really hits the reader hard in the stomach.
This poem is gorgeously haunting, and I enjoyed it so much! Even though it’s short, it carried an impactful meaning.
As of right now, I don’t have any advice, except to continue your amazing works and finding depth in everything you do and see and touch! Keep going, my friend. Happy writing!
~catsz
I just really want points to make some satire.. so, REVIEW TIME!!
It's a poem simply about fire but let's look for hidden meanings (if there are none I'm gonna be sad) and along the way work on GRAMMAR and what I THINK will work better!
"Fire burns. Consumes all.
Overtakes everything in its path.
Makes you do crazy things.
Makes you believe." is this a reference to smoking?
Now this "Fire crackles. Loud and proud.
Shows the world it’s not afraid.
Makes you feel happy.
Makes you believe." smoking?
"
Fire exists. Just like hope.
Gives you faith, yet you are vulnerable.
Makes you stronger yet weaker.
Makes you believe." smoking. Is this a poem about smoking?
Now on this poem makes me feel: Confused, is fire right or wrong? Good or bad? What do you do? An aching need to make a decision but not knowing how?
So smoking? Sorry, it's on me for not understanding the emotional metaphors here... I'm horrible at that which is why I'm terrified of writing reviews for poems. Aaaa, no idea if this was helpful.... BYE!