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Chapter 2 - Revelations

by McGregorUK


Chapter 2

Revelations

March 2nd 2015, 17:56

Ysolda Froze. Her heart rate shot up, it pumped so rapidly Ysolda felt as though it would blast right through her chest. Her focus was drawn to the ever nearing and gently wavering barrel of the gun, her eyebrows quivered along with the rest of her shaking adolescent frame. Every colour in her peripheral drained away but for vivid silver glint shining off the gun. It seemed to go on for an eternity though only moments had passed, Ysolda would surely have buckled at the knees were it not for a young man’s voice breaking the silence, ''Lower the gun out of her face!, look at her she's terrified'', his voice had a faint accent to it, t had an Essex type tone to it though he clearly knew this and had dulled it down.

The man holding the gun then replied to the young man ''Sorry Dennis, I didn't want to take any chances mate'', the gunman lowered his arm and holstered the pistol. Ysolda found herself turning to face her saviour. The young man stepped forward, ''It's okay we're not here to hurt you darlin'' his words rang confident and true. Ysolda then looked up at his face and was pleasantly surprised with what she saw, their eyes made contact. Ysolda was taken back by how handsome he was, she flickered her eyebrows as her cheeks grew red with embarrassment. He stood around 5ft 10in, he had deep blue eyes which glimmered likeraindrops falling amist a stormas lights from the distant explosions reflected off them. His face was strong and attractive with a squared off jaw and a slight stubble.

He was very intimidating Ysolda yet she saw an element of kindness behind striking appearance. The man held out his hand, ''Sorry we had to meet like this, My names Dennis, and I hope you can forgive my friend Jack here, he can be a bit trigger happy at times''. Jack took offence to the remark ''Well you can be a bit Del Boy stupid sometimes'' Ysolda giggled and reached out to shake Dennis' hand, '''An I’m Ysolda, that's Yos-ol-da'', Dennis gave a smile, ''Nice to meet you Ysolda, a suitable name for such a pretty girl'' Ysolda blushed and cowered behind her hair. Amongst all the excitement Ysolda had totally forgotten about her parents, ''HEY!!'' shouted Ysolda ''What have you done with my parents!?'' the smile then ran away from Dennis' face.


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Fri Feb 17, 2012 7:12 pm
NicholasStone wrote a review...



My comment did get posted, correct?




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25 Reviews


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Fri Feb 17, 2012 3:03 pm
Gringoamericano says...



Well, you have my attention. It's a good thing to post small excerpts so you'll have people coming back for more (that's also a strategy some authors are using,sell each book by the chapter). There are a few grammatical errors and typos, though.




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Mon Feb 13, 2012 6:23 pm
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NicholasStone says...



Interesting. Sorry it took so long for me to respond. This is really good. I'm not entirely sure what's going on, but the element of mystery is a great thing to have. Nothing much to correct here, although it was a little short, the length of a chapter doesn't matter, just the quality. I think it was very well done, but there are a few grammatical mistakes you might want to fix. :)





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