Young Writers Society

I loved this script I would like to see it as a short comedy show that comes on when commercials are supposed to. It would be that good. I love this part:

Writer's Block: *in a sassy, teenage girl voice* Oh, no you didn't. *snaps fingers in a Z formation*

Muse: That's right. I went there. *slashes at Writer's Block's throat. He deflects the pen just in time* Ooh, little author! I just had an idea that will improve your story!

I like randomness... So I'd say I loved it... Would love to watch it live...
And yeah, this part was really crazy, but I found it hilarious:

Writer's Block: *backs Muse into a corner* Haha, I've got you - *cell phone rings*

Muse: *impatient sigh*

Writer's Block: *adopts a whiny, childish voice as he speaks into phone* What, Mom? Yes, I clipped Grandma's toenails. What do you mean, one's embedded in the wall? That's not my - oh, you found those. *lowers voice* I just got excited and had a... spill. *appalled* No, Mom, not that kind of spill!

*Muse clears her throat pointedly*

Writer's Block: Look, Mom, I have to go. Uh-huh, yeah, love you too. Bye! *hangs up and instantly looking menacing again* Now, where were we?
Keep writing more...

Hahaha.
This is such a funny story.Rather random, but still funny.
Loved how Edward Cullen dies as well.

Why hello there! I'm here with a teeny-tiny review to give!

First off, for script-writing, use brackets instead of those star-thingies!

Writer's Block: [scans the story] Hmm. This one actually had some promise. Too bad I'm going to have to erase all your ideas and plot plans. [pulls out giant pink eraser] Now hold still. This won't hurt... me.

*Muse and Writer's Block continue battling*

*Author crawls to her story and tries to write, but the words just won't come*

*Slowly, Writer's Block pushes Muse back towards the wall*

[MUSE and WRITER'S BLOCKcontinue battling. AUTHOR crawls to her story and tries to write, but the words just won't come. Slowy, WRITER'S BLOCK pushes MUSE back towards the wall.]

*The unicorn knocks Writer's Block off the plot box and then promptly begins eating the Author's wallpaper*

A couple things:
1. What happened to the Girl Scout? You put her in the script but never took her out.
2. Where did the Twilight haters come from? Was a memo sent out?
3. Most authors would never admit that their stories are “poorly written.”
4. The author obviously likes writing (seeing as she was so desperate to get the story finished) so why does she think an essay is unfortunate?
5. What do you do with the body of the hair-gel junkie?
6. I think the narrator would appreciate more lines.
Other than that I found the story extremely humorous. Keep up the good work.

LOL awesome!! its about time sum1 put down twilight!!!

It was simple. I like it like this. I just went pee, I have to go again now.

Very funny, simple humor. I think you could turn this into a detailed work if you wanted. If not it's great like this!

Two things.

First:
Blocking and direction. Hard to understand with the **** things around them italicized is you best bet, also tooooooo muuuuuch. Let the dialog speak for its self don't rely on the blocking as a crutch. Please, you will grow enormously as a playwright if you don't leave out tedious unnecessary blocking notes.

Second:
(And very superficial)
Why does everyone on this forum post stuff about twilight. I'm so tired of it. If there was a place i could rant about this on i would but, gosh i'm so tired of seeing Twilight on this script forum. Come on guys. Don't you have something better than twilight references. Jeeze.

Over all though interesting idea. If you want a similar piece but about actors and their struggles check out Christopher Durang's "An actors nightmare" quite good.

Keep up the good work.

~Bard

It was HILARIOUS!!!!!!! THe funniest part was about MJ!

Hi Mangus! Here is one of your requested reviews for winning my contest!

My gosh, I was laughing my head of reading this! The BBCode could use some work (You're missing the bolding on several lines) but I'm having a hard time seeing anything fundamentally wrong with this. I shall point out bits and pieces, though, in hopes that this will be a productive review. xD

*Doorbell rings several more times, playing the Jaws theme song*

Writer's Block: *sighs* I didn't want to have to do this, but... *pulls out poster of Robert Pattinson*

Author: *screams and covers her eyes* No! Too... much... hair... gel... *collapses*

Writer's Block: *scans the story* Hmm. This one actually had some promise. Too bad I'm going to have to erase all your ideas and plot plans. *pulls out giant pink eraser* Now hold still. This won't hurt... me.

Muse: Never! *chucks corndog at Writer's Block's head*

*Long silence*

Writer's Block: *in a sassy, teenage girl voice* Oh, no you didn't. *snaps fingers in a Z formation*

Muse: A new main character for your story! *smacks Writer's Block in the shin with her pen*

*Edward attempts to speed run to Author's aid, but since I can't afford special effects for this script he just looks really, really stupid*

*Muse snaps her fingers again, and a unicorn appears*
*The unicorn knocks Writer's Block off the plot box and then promptly begins eating the Author's wallpaper*

Author: Out of my way. *pushes Edward Cullen out of the way and seizes the box* Hehe, mine! *tosses the plot box onto the paper, where it is sucked into the story*

Writer's Block: NOOOOOOO!!!! *shrinks to pocket size*

Muse: Oh, here. *pulls out gun and shoots Edward*

*Twilight haters converge on the Muse. Cheering, they lift her onto their shoulders and parade down the street*

Stephenie Meyer: *appears in front of Author* Darn. Now I'm going to have to create more shallow, clichéd characters to populate my poorly written books!

Hey there!

Haha! That really made my day! (Well that and taking my sister down in Walmart )

I loved this! I sometimes get this way when I think I have a pretty good story going, if only I had a Muse to help defend me from Writer's Block with a pen, a unicorn, and a banana

I totally loved these parts:

Writer's Block: Prepare to meet your doom!

Muse: Never! *chucks corndog at Writer's Block's head*

*Long silence*

Writer's Block: *in a sassy, teenage girl voice* Oh, no you didn't. *snaps fingers in a Z formation*

Muse: That's right. I went there.

*Author scans her story, sidestepping away from Edward Cullen, who has been blinded by his own bushy eyebrows and is now wandering in circles*

Muse: Here, Author, catch! *sneezes, and a banana falls out of the sky and lands in Author's hands*

Author: *eagerly* Is this for the story?

Muse: No, silly, it's for this. *grabs banana and smacks Writer's Block with it*

Writer's Block: AH! Banana in the eye! *drops sword and eraser and clutches his eye*

That was extremely funny!
The fighting scene went on for a bit too long, but I still liked it.
The whole bushy eyebrow thing made me laugh so hard. My favorite part was when she opened the door and the guy was like, "I am writers block!" That was hilarious! I was a little confused when Edward and Stefanie Meyers just popped up out of nowhere. lolz

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hahaaaa....eh that was funny...*wipes tears from eyes and smacks...and walks away*

This is definitely a very different kind of work,
I think a lot of people, especially on this site can relate to this.
making the writers block and the muse living people is a very cleaver way to make a script on writers block.
Mixing Stephanie Meyer and Edward Cullen in the mix made this piece even more unique, although I think maybe you should have chossen a athor os a renound master piece like jane austen or charlotte bronte.
The author is very romantic about his work, it's just an idea to do the story again but in a level headed writer who is struggling with writers block, or trying to bring something whimsical into it's work.
This is a really well done work, there is something funny about it although it it not a funny issue.
You push some barriers to make this very UN-cliched.
this is very well done, keep writing.

Vera

On terms of "masterpieces of our time", this isn't anywhere close.
However, on terms of "Most Kick-butt hilarious thing on this side of the Moon", this is up in the top ten!
It was incredibly creative, witty, timely, and just what I needed: a good long laugh!
Indeed, the randomness of this story combined with the complete honesty of the message (This is almost exactly how I think of writers block!) makes one of the best comedy scripts I've ever read!!

long live Magnusbanefan13 and down with Edward Cullen!!!

Beannach leibh!

LordLoredaen

YES!! Die Twilight/Edward Cullen!! DIE!!! God Stephine Myer sucks!! Instead of writing she should be shopping at RC Willy. The Mormon place!

wow, just wow. I think this is one of those stories were randomness actually works. Though there is a lot of space. Maybe if you filled in some space. When the characters appear, is there a light, a mist, a vortex, or a waterfall. Fill in the spaces and you will go far.

That was probably one of the best scripts I've read on here!



I absolutely love the randomness! This is like my brain on paper! (Totally random and sometimes doesn't make sense)

Here are some suggestions:

Edward was really random. Like they said above me, scripts are for plays and you can't just have Edward appearing out of no where. How about in the beginning (or anywhere else in the story before Edward appears) add something like this : *As the Author is writing, she keeps nervously glancing at the trash can, where a Twilight book lays, hoping it's no where near as bad.* and when Ed-sparkly-ward comes in maybe something like *And then, the poorly written Twilight book starts to burn, and out of the flames comes a sparkling Edward*

And I think "corndog" is two separate words.

And did Writer's Block mean to say "funny" instead of "puny"?



Favorite Parts:

Figure: I'm your worst nightmare. Mwahahaha!

Author: *gasp* Not Michael Jackson!

Writer's Block: *sighs* I didn't want to have to do this, but... *pulls out poster of Robert Pattinson*

Author: *screams and covers her eyes* No! Too... much... hair... gel... *collapses*

Muse: Never! *chucks corndog at Writer's Block's head*

Writer's Block: *in a sassy, teenage girl voice* Oh, no you didn't. *snaps fingers in a Z formation*

Writer's Block: Think fast! *flings a Girl Scout at Muse, then pounces on the plot box* Haha, you'll never fix your pathetic little story! *frantically starts to erase box*

Muse: You have that essay to write next week, right?

Author: *rolls eyes* Unfortunately.

Muse: *beams* See you then! *starts to walk down the driveway*

Muse: Oh, here. *pulls out gun and shoots Edward*

Hi magnus!

*pants from laughing too much*

I only have one comment and one suggestion to make on this piece.

Comment!
I really liked how it was without the whole Twilight thingy. Don't take me wrong, I've read the books, but this would be much more interesting if it was only about the fight for creativity to finish a story.

Suggestion!
As Zinnie has mentioned, where did the characters came up from?
When you're writing a script, you usually should write as if it was to be read by actors and played on a stage. Like: *Stephenie Meyer pops in from a blue mist* or something.

Overall: This was very funny! I absolutely loved it and *clears throat* Robert Pattinson is cute!
*runs away afraid of an attack*

*Kat*

Hello!
This was funny! I liked it. So, for a bit of my opinion.

1. I agree with Gale, it gets very random. I got kind of lost near the end. The unicorn, the corndog, the Girl Scout, and the banana make the story very confusing. (Not to mention Edward.)

2. The whole thing was basically a giant fight scene. Remember, even awesome, mind-numbing battles can get a bit old.

3. I don’t know how you would do this, if you were actually performing it. With all the appearing and glowing, it would be pretty hard. (Not to mention things being sucked into a book.)

I just notice something.

Stephenie Meyer: Oh, no! A defenseless girl! I must send my ridiculously overprotective vampire to defend her before she breaks a nail! *kicks Edward Cullen towards Author and disappears again*

Well, that was interesting. Another reason why we all need a show on the Animal Channel. It certainly was funny, and random. And twilight haters will love it (if you run with vampires, remember- We are the reasons vampires are running) The only thing I didn't like was the fact that it gets a bit too random (Where did the Girl Scout come from?) Otherwise, keep writing, writer of prey!