Published May 19, 2012
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141,365 Literary Works • 674,382 Reviews
Hi Macy! I'm Drama, and I'm here to review you today
Wow... Darling, you know all these lines aren't questions, correct? We'll start with fixing the poem first, and then we'll talk about the content.
I spend hours looking at the mirror
Searching for who I truly am .
Underneath everything everyone believes I am, underneath everything I think I am.
Who am I truly?
??The mirror holds nothing,/b] Just my empty reflection[b].
Who am I inside, away from what I show you?
Will you answer me?
??Can you answer me?
??NEW LINE
I can't answer myself?? My soul hungers for the truth.
Something that no one can give me.
No one but you, Yet you turn your back on me.
You leave me alone, I am alone.
Somewhere where ??Not even the mirror can answer me.
This poem is very repetitive. And a little woe is me. Maybe it's because you use normal, every day language instead of using metaphors, similes, new unused words. Try using a thesaurus. Try thinking of new ways to explain what you're feeling. Just expand your knowledge of uncommon words and metaphors.
Hope I helped!
~Drama
sorry that my editing thingy kind of messed up... xD