Published February 5, 2011
Deleted.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
140,959 Literary Works • 673,783 Reviews
When I first saw the title I thought "Oooh serious title..." and then I clicked on it to see the single sentence. I have to say, it made me smile. I love the power that is behind the sentence, the only t hing that I would say is that it just doesn't seem to fit with lyric poetry. But, hey, that's your decision and if you feel it does, keep it in this section. I think it'd be interesting if you expanded on the sentence into a full length poem - but I have to say if you don't, I love it like this. That one line really is filled with emotion when you read it - and the title of the poem leads up to it. Fabulous job!
Soo...I'm not exactly sure if this is the full thing...orr if you're still editing and adding things on or not. I'm going to assume not, because it's been about an hour since you posted it, and it's still just the one thing. So there's really not much to review, since it's just the one sentence, but I really love the idea behind it. I'm not sure if this really belongs in lyric poetry, maybe in Other? PM me if you'd like it moved
. But yea, I like the idea behind it, really powerful.
~Hope