Young Writers Society

This was very inspiring and full of energy. There are some grammatical and punctuation errors but those could be easily fixed. I really enjoyed it and actually learned from this. keep writing xoxo

Hey! I've been on a review halt for a bit. But this brought me out of it, because I LOVE IT. XD

I like the way that you arranged it visually because it helps the reader to know the type of rhythm and flow that you're going for. And I also like it because it adds to the meaning of the poem so great job on that.
I really thought this was well written and I can't wait to see what more you have to share with the world. It was a great read for me, and I felt what the person felt, I relate, which is important to do as a writer. Also I actually like works that aren't super long, and have more meaning hanging on each word, so I think you portrayed such a piece really well.

Keep writing and keep dreaming. XD

"because life can be really tricky and it's too short to act all serious and uncaring and you should live to the fullest like every day is the last , like every second is the most important , don't waste it sleeping , do it whatever you dislike ,hanging out with people you are not found of because the worst thing we can ever do to ruin our lives is pretending , to pretend you are happy to pretened you are satisfied , to pretend you like people that you don't give a damn about "

I really enjoyed reading this the only thing that I would have to say is you didn't capitalize a couple things. Its awesome anyways this is my favorite part
"everyone and his dreams and desires and while looking for ourselves we'll meet people or more likely people will meet us across our journey that will change -probably- our destination ,our hopes , dreams it might grow bigger ,wider ,richer and it might be very simple and modest more like settling down and making a family .personally i belong to the whole let's stay forever young things . i like to have an adventure more then a plain "life" to live to the fullest ,to climb every mountain and swim in every ocean and see the moon's various shapes and forms in different areas of the world as if i m spending a lunar mouth in different spaces a crescent moon in Spain ,a full in japan and sometimes i don't spend that much time in a place to even catch the lunar phase ."

The part about the moon is really unique and original ) Love it! Keep posting xxxx

This piece has a nice message, though I'm afraid it may at times be more complex that "Do what you love, love what you do." Also, there seems to be a bit of a contradiction when you say in the last paragraph "do it whatever you dislike". For awhile, I wasn't sure if this was some sort of typo or not.

Unlike Twinkle, I don't know if I completely agree with everything, such as when you say that people who don't like travelling have "no idea that the real source of their anxieties and panic attacks are actually themselves ,their boring ,low life jobs that sucks life out of them." I know you didn't mean it quite that way, but it comes off sounding like anyone who doesn't spend vacations in a bunch of different vacations around the world are boring, scared people. There are a lot of hard-working people who don't go traveling around the world and are still brave. Again, I know that's probably not what you meant, but you should probably clarify that or do a bit more explaining there for a bit.

If you have any questions, you can ask me. I'm not sure if I explained very well.

Great point though!
Tgirly

Wow, I so totally agree with everything you just said. I too have always been a dreamer and wished to travel the world and uncover its secrets. I have somewhat the same motto. 'to never give up what I love most.' You've given quite a speech here and I'll show this to all my friends so they can smile while reading this, just like I did just now. Keep working hard for what you love most. =]