E - Everyone

The Kingly Mammal

Look how God has crowned him

With scorching orange flame.

Look at his majesty

And his acrobatic frame.

                                                                                                                                                        Gaze upon his glory--

The fiery striped coat

He so richly wears and

The white cloth on his throat.

                                                                                                                                                           Is God not personified

Somewhat in this mammal--

One He made so kingly,

So stately and regal?

                                                                                                                                                               This creature is different,

Like no other vertebrate.

God has created others,

But not one quite like it.

Comments & reviews · 13
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User avatar
Mysticalxx
Review

This one was easy! I was thinking "lion" when I read the title, but you wrote "striped coat" in the poem, so it has to be either a tiger or a cat, doesn't it? :D Anyway, REALLY nice poem! I'm impressed by the fine imagery you've ysed, your expressions and the fine langauge being utliised in the poem. Thumbs up to ya! The beginning stanza is really good.

Keep it up!

Mysticalxx

User avatar
Mysticalxx
Comment

This one was easy! I was thinking "lion" when I read the title, but you wrote "striped coat" in the poem, so it has to be either a tiger or a cat, doesn't it? :D Anyway, REALLY nice poem! I'm impressed by the fine imagery you've ysed, your expressions and the fine langauge being utliised in the poem. Thumbs up to ya! The beginning stanza is really good.

Keep it up!

Mysticalxx

User avatar
RubyRed
Review

Hello Link! It's a me Nunya. I very much like this poem. I also think that this was very clever because not only did you make a rhythmic poem it rhymes and contains a riddle. So even though you have said what the riddle is about, I would have thought it was a tiger. I guess I was wrong it was a tabby. Anyways keep writing and NEVER get discouraged because,

"If we all did the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves." -Thomas Edison :D :D

User avatar
Vivian
Comment

A lion or a giraffe. I don't know what a vertebrate is. :I

A vertebrate is a creature with a backbone. Any mammal is also a vertebrate. The one I wrote about is an orange tabby, hehe.

I really liked this! I'm going to assume you were referring to a Bengal tiger, for the sake of the rest of this review.
Tigers are truly beautiful creatures, and you captured that magnificently in this poem. I do agree with Rurouni, however, the word "God" is slightly overrused. I would suggest phrases such as the Creator, or something else to suggest to people not familiar with Christianity the idea you are trying to put forth. I also would have liked to see more abstract ides about the way he was made, such as God carefully painting each individual stripe.
But completely disregarding the fact that I'm critiqueing a poem I could never even come close to, great job!!!! I can't wait to see mroe from you!

User avatar
Rurouni
Review
Rurouni wrote a review · Mon Sep 08, 2014 3:16 am

Hi!


This is really cool! This is a short review, but I'm here anyways!


I like the use of God, but maybe its just... Too many times? Maybe "The Holy Ghost" or you know, other names. If not, hey, it still sounds good.

I'm guessing its a Tiger, bengal? I'm guessing tiger XD

This was fun!

Great work, keep it up!


Always~

~Rurouni

Yes, it's a cat. Tiger is probably the best interpretation, but I was actually referring to my orange tabby.

Ah XD. Cute poem noneless.

User avatar
GeeLyria
Review

Hi Linkzude. :)

Look how God has crowned him

With scorching orange flame.

I believe this is a lion. :)

I love your writing style, it is so simple and beautiful. I also like that you never mention what is it you're talking about, making your piece a poem-riddle. It's something I really would've enjoyed as a kid. Actually, I think it would be awesome if you were to make a whole collection of these kind of poems. I have a suggestion though... if I were you, I would try to make stanzas, because that would give your reader a space to breathe. But other than that, it's great.

Keep writing!

Thanks for your review. I'm glad you enjoyed it, and I'll go add those stanzas.

Thanks for your review. I'm glad you enjoyed it, and I'll go add those stanzas.

Okay, I mended it--it now has stanzas. :)

User avatar
Linkzude16
Comment

I apologize for my misuse of the colon. Oops.

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spottedkit Comment

A caracal?

I don't know what that is, but no.

User avatar
DoodleNugget
Comment

Polar Bear?

I like this poem :D
I think it's a tiger...

You have the closest guess. It's about an orange tabby cat; but it holds the exact same idea: now that I think about it. Good thinking.

User avatar
eleanor12 Comment

Is it a lion?

User avatar
Linkzude16
Comment

I keep making blank comments--my bad, hehe.



The greatest part of a writer’s time is spent in reading, in order to write; a man will turn over half a library to make one book.
— Samuel Johnson