Published July 4, 2010
Burning in my blood
Sparks on my tongue
Sweet silence fills the night
Looking in your eyes
Leaning in close
Feeling the heat
And loving the moment
How could I have known?
That when you said that single sentence
That you truly mean it?
So many before you
Spoke those words
But they were only broken promises
Leaving scars and painful memories
That only time can try and heal
Looking back now it seems so far
Like a lifetime has watched our follies
Made fools of us all
But although this life brings tears and pain
The warmth that is felt in your presence
Is unlike any emotion I can muster
I would not trade an eon of time for this
Nor would I re-do any action in my life
For those events have led me to you
And that is all that matters
For when you say that sentence
My heart sings with joy and soul flies
I have a purpose and although some may laugh
Others scoff and mock
But to love is to find oneself
And I am content with myself and this life
I love you
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
141,411 Literary Works • 674,393 Reviews
Hey razzleberryx!
Thanks for the input! I'm fairly new at this stuff and I know punctuation has always been my downfall
I love how real and truthful this poem is. It's written very well and the word choice and rhythm are amazing. But I do think that punctuation may make it a bit more powerful. It flows really well, but there were 1 or 2 places that seemed kind of weird and could be stumbled over when reading. But other than that, I definitely enjoyed this piece a lot. :]