Young Writers Society

You're Too Young

by Lib

                                                       ~Scene 1~

KAILA gets in the car, when MOM comes to pick her up


MAMA: Hey! How was school?

KAILA: Okay, I guess.

MAMA: What did you do?

KAILA: Watch people use their phones.

MAMA: What about yours?

KAILA: Very funny. I’ll be goin’ around showin’ off a flip phone to all the kids with iPhones and whatnot!

MAMA: What’s the problem with a flippy?

KAILA: It’s a flip phone, Mama.


KAILA: You won’t get it. (pause) Why can’t I have a proper phone?

MAMA: You have a perfectly fine phone. I don’t see a single defect in it.

KAILA: A perfectly flip phone. I want an iPhone, or a Samsung, or… or, something other than a flippy!

MAMA: I can get you one of those tiny Nokia phones.

KAILA: What’s a Nokia phone? I want a cool phone. Everyone in class has a cool phone.

MAMA: If everyone else were to jump off bridges, would you start doing the same?

KAILA: Um, what?

MAMA: You want what everyone else wants. So if everyone else wants to jump off a bridge, I’m assuming you’d want to as well.

KAILA: Mama, that has nothing at all to do with phones.

MAMA: It’s the same topic.

KAILA: It’s - you know what? Never mind.

MAMA: Watch your tone.

KAILA: Sorry.

MAMA and KAILA get out of the car

~Scene 2~

MAMA and KAILA are watching TV

KAILA: Aw, Mama, look at that cat!

MAMA: I know - so cute!

KAILA: Remember when Papa said I could adopt a cat?

MAMA: What?

MAMA turns off the TV

KAILA: Remember when Papa said I could adopt a cat when we move next year? Can I have it now?


KAILA: Please?

MAMA: We can decide when we get to Sydney.

KAILA: Why then?

MAMA: First of all, you can barely handle your closet, how can I hand over a cat? “Oh, here you go, Kaila, you can have a cat - take care of it, don’t kill it, don’t lose it.” (pause) Never. Second of all, if you can’t remember when you have to do homework, how am I supposed to know you’ll remember to feed the animal?

KAILA: I can take care of my closet! And I remember when I have to do my homework!

MAMA: I opened the closet once, and your pile of clothes fell out and on me. I had to arrange the entire thing.

KAILA: Well… I promise I’ll take care of the cat - give it it’s food, clean out it’s litter box, and if it needs meds, then that too, and… obviously, cuddle with it as well.

MAMA: Show me and your father some responsibility and then we’ll think about it.

KAILA: I am responsible! I’ve been finishing my work for two months in a row, and that too, on time!

MAMA: Something other than work. After grade nine you’re going to be in IB, and that’s advance stuff, in case you still haven’t realized. How are you going to take out time for the cat?

KAILA: I’ll handle it. Maybe the cat will urge me into finishing my work faster.

MAMA: It’ll be a distraction.

KAILA: It won’t. I promise. Can you… please think about it? Properly? Pretty please?

MAMA: Ask your father.

KAILA: Well can you and Papa both talk it over? Please!

MAMA: Okay. (pause) If we get time.

KAILA: Mama.

MAMA: Okay, okay, I will.

KAILA: Thank you.

MAMA: The pleasure is mine.

~Scene 3~

KAILA walks into the house and meets MAMA in the living room

KAILA: Mama?


KAILA: You know how I saved up a bunch of my money?

MAMA: What about it?

KAILA: It’s been all summer. And working at McDonald’s has earned me a lotta money. I have enough money to -

MAMA: Get a phone. Yeah, I know.

KAILA: Um. And I sorta went and got a phone with a plan. (pause) I’ll pay for it! I promise I will!

MAMA: Did you already!? Kaila…

KAILA: Yeah, sorta kinda.

MAMA: You say that as if you split the phone in half and just took half the phone, kid.

KAILA: I got the whole thing.

KAILA gets her phone.

KAILA: Look at this beauty!

MAMA: Congratulations. You’re officially a responsible kid but I hate how you got the phone without me.

KAILA: C’mon, Mama. The first thing you can do is call Grams with it!

MAMA: She lives in Germany. It’ll cost triple your actual phone cost to call her.

KAILA: I got an all-distance plan.

MAMA: What?

KAILA: An all-distance plan, because I thought you’d like it.

MAMA: For me?


MAMA: Pass me the phone!

KAILA: Here you go.

MAMA rushes off with the phone to go talk to Grams. KAILA is grinning.

~Scene 4~

MAMA and KAILA are at the Veterinary Hospital. They are standing in front of the CLERK woman..

MAMA: Hi, um, we’re here to adopt the kitten…

CLERK: Oh! Yes, yes, hold on let me find the adoption papers.

CLERK goes to find papers

KAILA: Ohh, Mama I’m so excited!

MAMA: I know, kiddo. You fill out the forms. I’ll go sit.

KAILA: Okay!

CLERK: Here’s the papers, just fill them out and let your mother sign the bottom.

KAILA: Thank you!


KAILA goes to MAMA

KAILA: (pause) Mama. Who’s phone number should I write?

MAMA: Yours.

KAILA: I’m not doing mine!

MAMA: Why’d you waste your breath then? (pause) It’s your kitten. You’re adopting it. Not me. You’re responsible for it, so write your own number, or else we’re leaving right now.

KAILA: Wowzers. Love the speech.

MAMA: Kaila!

KAILA: Seriously, thanks for letting me adopt this kitten before Sydney.

Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.

Is this a review?



User avatar

Points: 0
Reviews: 0

Fri Aug 28, 2020 6:25 pm
View Likes

its really good and you should continue to

Lib says...

Aw thanks!


User avatar
88 Reviews

Points: 150
Reviews: 88

Sun Apr 26, 2020 3:33 pm
View Likes
scatteredscones wrote a review...

This is Gem climbing out of her fairy garden for a review!

This is a nice piece, it is the first script I've ever really reviewed. That being said, I have looked into script writing before for personal writing. So fear not, I almost know what I'm doing. >.O It looks very neat and concise, the setting is plotted out nicely and the dialogue was done very well. I love the realistic termanology you used. The grammar is impeccable from my view and the characters seemed to age throughout the script well with the time flow you depicted. However, I feel like you could have done more with the characters. They talk and they go places but the realism is dropped by how they never seem to move or have expression changes. As the writer I'm sure you know what they are doing and when they are doing it. The issue is with out stage directions/ implications of their movements. They seem to be mannequines that just have real conversations and go to real places. The characters would feel more realistic if you showed movements or expressions. Overall this was a great script with a lot of character development in the dialogue and I loved seeing Kaila blossom throughout the story. You did well with this and I encourage you to write more scripts in the future. If I wasn't clear enough with my nitpicks please let me know I would love to talk with you more about this. <3

This is Gem skipping on to the next. >.O Keep writing Lib. I love your style.

Lib says...

Thanks for the review, Gem!! <3 :)

You are always welcome love. :)

User avatar
68 Reviews

Points: 810
Reviews: 68

Tue Mar 17, 2020 6:01 am
View Likes
BhavyaMehta123 wrote a review...

Hi@Hedwiggle. I am here to review this. This is simple, sweet and adorable. I am in love with the bond of KALIA and MAMA. This is kind of relatable to every kid. As we all want what our peers have. But the best thing is how KALIA proves herself being responsible and earn the phone and the kitten. And makes her mother happy and proud especially by getting a ' all- distance plan.' Your writing is an example of 'Simplicity at its best'

And that line " If everyone else jumps off a bridge...." that is pet line of every parent in the world.
Overall I am in love with the plot and script. And you knitted the story so well and presented it.
From: Bhavya.

Lib says...

Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it!

User avatar
83 Reviews

Points: 1556
Reviews: 83

Sat Jan 11, 2020 3:45 am
View Likes
MeherazulAzim16 wrote a review...

Hi Liberty!

You're Too Young was just as fun to read.

I like how it's a complete story and everything comes full circle. Kayla wants a smartphone; Kayla also wants to adopt a kitten. But her mother doesn't think she needs a smartphone; she can't get a kitten because she's too irresponsible. She proves to her mom that she can be responsible by saving up money and buying a phone on her own. Et voila, she gets to adopt the kitten. Solid character arc.

I also like how Mama grows as a character. Growing to like smartphones; growing to trust Kaila, which Kaila actually earns by her own actions.

It's another happiness-inducing story with good dialogue. It's cool that it kind of has a moral too.

Have a good day and keep on writing good stories!



Lib says...

Thanks for the review! :P

User avatar
212 Reviews

Points: 575
Reviews: 212

Sat Dec 14, 2019 9:34 pm
View Likes
EverLight wrote a review...

EverLight here with a review! This review is not intended to offend or hurt you or make your novel or poem seem bad, but be warned you may feel offended anyway

First Impression
I was looking for something to review and this caught me eye. I mean, it's written by you, and your humor is top notch we go. XD

Nitpicks & Grannar

Let's get started with this line-

I want an iPhone, or a Samsung, or… or, something other than a flippy!

You may want to remove the after the word iPhone.[/quote]

Next we'll deal with this line-

Well… I promise I’ll take care of the cat - give it it’s food, clean out it’s litter box, and if it needs meds, then that too, and… obviously, cuddle with it as well.

I don't think that apostrophe it's works in that context. Maybe consider using its?

In this sentence you misspelled the word advanced-
Something other than work. After grade nine you’re going to be in IB, and that’s advance stuff, in case you still haven’t realized.

Other then that you did fine.

Style & Flow
Nothing to complain about here

Overall you did a uh...shall we say a humorous, funny, and wacky job?

EverLight Out

Lib says...

Thanks :)

EverLight says...

Your welcome <3

User avatar
1464 Reviews

Points: 83957
Reviews: 1464

Fri Dec 13, 2019 1:41 pm
View Likes
JabberHut wrote a review...

I have nothing constructive to say because this was just so freaking adorable.

I love your characters, I love the relationship between Mama and Kaila, and I love just how real it all felt. I wanted to slap Mama at first, like HEY. PETS HELP KIDS LEARN RESPONSIBILITY. GET THE KITTY. And Kaila was even doing her schoolwork and I'm like MAMA HOW DOES BEING RESPONSIBLE WITH SCHOOL NOT CONSTITUTE AS RESPONSIBLE. But then Kaila proved herself on her own and it was just so wonderful.

The story started out with this topic of the phone -- omg I laughed at the Nokia lines -- and then it went into this topic about the cat, and I was like... where is this going. But then it immediately went back to the topic of the phone, and I got so worried that something bad would happen because Kaila did it on her own and the tension felt so real bUT THEN SHE GOT A KITTEN and you ended the thing with the phone number line and omfg. I just freaking LOVE how this developed. The pacing was just fantastic.

She even got her own plan for her new phone. Family plans can be so much cheaper if several people in the family are using phones, but Kaila got her own plan that she'd have to pay regularly!

And omg bless her heart, Kaila let her Mama call their grams with her own phone. What a way to earn her respect, being so humble and kind and omfg is this a disney movie??

I'm impressed they're moving to Sydney. I wouldn't mind a quick line or exchange about why they were moving, but that doesn't matter all that much. The idea of traveling with a kitten sounds awful, but it IS an overdue promise sO YEAH GET HER THE KITTY.

This was just super cute. I really enjoyed this, so absolutely well done!

Jabber, the One and Only!

Lib says...

Thank you, Jabber, for the review! I always look forward to them. XD

User avatar
187 Reviews

Points: 10635
Reviews: 187

Fri Dec 13, 2019 12:34 am
View Likes
WinnyWriter wrote a review...

Hey, there! This is a really cute script. The story is easy to follow, and yet the underlying points are sorta funny (in a good way). :) I love how you can progressively see Kaila's mom bending under the pressure her daughter puts on her to get the stuff she wants. Also, the "if everyone was jumping off a bridge, would you do it, too" thing is SO mom-y. (If anybody's mom hasn't used that on them, are they even a person??) Anyway, you can see that the mom's whole attitude changes by the end. It's so funny how she grabs the phone when she hears about the all-distance plan. XD Definitely my favorite scene.

Your spelling, punctuation, and grammar errors are few and small enough that I won't bother pointing them out this time. Anyway, thanks for posting this. You've done a great job. Keep it up!

Lib says...

Thanks for the review! You're so kind. <3

I just write poetry to throw my mean callous heartless exterior into sharp relief. I’m going to throw you off the ship anyway.
— Vogon Captain (The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy)