Tiny Bed

by LiNdSeYo7

Published December 17, 2007

Let’s fall asleep in a tiny bed
So I can curl up in your sweat
Because every minute we’re apart
Is a bit of living lost
I will curl up in you sweat
And sleep to the beat of your heart
It sounds like a drum.
I pinky promise that I’ll love you
Even when you’re drowning in rum
And a pint of hard times.
I’ll sit and kiss your eyelids
So that you can’t see anything
Other than love and my lips.
I will curl up in your sweat
And sleep to the beat of a drum
It sounds like your heart.
A bit of living’s lost
Every minute we sleep apart
So let’s curl up in a tiny bed.

Comments & reviews · 4
User avatar
Rigel
Review
Rigel wrote a review Review · Dec 18, 2007

I like the poem. What kind of poem is it? A free verse?

How do you not know that it's free verse? Can you read?

Besides that, I enjoyed it. It was very sweet -- very sweet, and it had this sparkling quality that played between the words as I read. It was a little bland, though. It needs something that jumps out, I think, to move to the next level, but if you meant to write a lovely little piece, you have succeeded.

User avatar
LiNdSeYo7
Comment
LiNdSeYo7 commented Comment · Dec 18, 2007

Yes, I would call it a free verse.

User avatar
blacktiger3915
Comment
blacktiger3915 commented Comment · Dec 17, 2007

I like the poem. What kind of poem is it? A free verse?



It's funny how humans can wrap their mind around things and fit them into their version of reality.
— Rick Riordan, The Lightning Thief