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16+ Language

Ranting? Excuse the Minor Swearing, I Must Let Some Steam Out.

by LakeOfCancer

Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language.

Does anyone really understand?

Because I don't think they do.

You tell me I'm beautiful,

But I can't see it.

I see a piece of crap:

The acne,

The large nose,

The misshapen eyebrows,

The weird face shape,

The ugly hair with so much dandruff,

The fat stomach,

The fat thighs,

The fat calves,

The weird feet,

The fat arms.

What do you see that I don't?

Why do you tell me that I'm pretty and cute when it's not true!?

I'm aware you're trying to be polite, 

but don't you get it?

I refuse your compliments.

You know, I don't want to

But I don't get a choice.

You lie to my face!

Don't tell me that I have some serious curves.

Don't tell me that I'm thicc.

Don't tell me that I have a great personality.

Don't tell me that I'm kind.

Have you actually seen me!?

Have you met me!?

I have no curves, 

that's just fat that decided that my sides 

were the best possible places to go to.

Who says I'm thicc? 

You realize that later today I had to ask if being called thicc was an insult?

I find it slightly offensive! 

I'm not smart! I don't get things as quickly as you people do.

What personality?

I'm dead inside.

If you were around me for a year and we got close,

you would enjoy the time away from me!

You can ask all the people I've cut out of from my life cause they were dicks.

Excuse me for my language but it's true.

Some people I know don't know when to shut up.

How the hell am I kind?


If you were around me for a year, 

you would realize that I'm an actual bad bitch.

I take shit from nobody.

I could care less if you think I'm rude.

Stop telling me that I'm beautiful.

I know what you'll say:

"But you are! Don't deny it!"

I am so sorry.



But guess what?

That's not how it works.

Remember when I had a boyfriend?

Oh! What's that? You don't remember?


When have you ever heard that I have a guy who likes me and I like them back!?


All my friends have guys that like them.

A freshman friend has a senior football player who likes them.

Ya know how jealous I am?


And at this point,

Who really cares anymore whether I get to have what everyone else has?

Beauty is bullshit cause one person in this world will never have it:


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1257 Reviews

Points: 36899
Reviews: 1257

Tue Nov 06, 2018 7:18 pm
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niteowl wrote a review...

Hi there LakeofCancer! Niteowl here to leave a quick review.

Overall, I'd say this is funny and too relatable. Heck, I'm literally twice your age and I'm still struggling with my self-image. Like no joke, I made some similar points to my therapist yesterday and now she's making me come up with positive things to say about myself. This is going to be hard.

Anyway, back to the piece. Some parts I liked
-The specificity of the physical gripes. It goes beyond "I'm ugly" and makes the reader think about their own insecurities.

I have no curves,

that's just fat that decided that my sides

were the best possible places to go to.

This is really funny.

Some parts I think could be improved.
Why do you tell me that I'm pretty and cute when it's not true!?

The formatting here is weird and actually goes against your message. By crossing out "not" here, you're saying that it is true that you're pretty, which contradicts the rest of the piece. Overall, I don't really think the bold/italics/crossing out is working here. At best, it's an emphasis you don't really need when the words themselves are so biting. At worst, the crossing out tends to make the message feel contradictory.

You realize that later today I had to ask if being called thicc was an insult?

I find it slightly offensive!

I'm not smart! I don't get things as quickly as you people do.

What personality?

I'm dead inside.

Okay, so I like the first part of this, because I'm old and out of touch so when I first heard "thicc" being thrown around I was like "wait is this a good thing oh goodness I'm old get off my lawn" :P. The second part is where you touch upon other self-critiques, but they never get fully developed. You say you're not smart and have no personality, but there's little to back that assertion up, unlike the extensive evidence presented for "I'm ugly". I'm not sure if it would be better to focus this on the more well-developed appearance issues or to present more examples to show why you're also dumb and have a terrible personality.

Overall, well, this is a rant so there's not much to critique. Some of the points could have more substance to them but overall it's on-point. Keep writing! :D

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87 Reviews

Points: 674
Reviews: 87

Tue Nov 06, 2018 6:06 pm
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TheMulticoloredCyr wrote a review...

Hi. You swore in the thing, so I hope you don't mind a bit of swearing here (though mine /might/ be a little worse).

I. Agree.

You see, I'm on the opposite side of this. I'm the one with a couple of guys who /kinda/ like how I look compared to the other girls. I'm not /ugly/, but that means absolutely nothing to me, because, first off, I might be bi, technically, but because of some past family bull****, I have zero trust for guys in general. At least, in a dating way, ya feel me? So I get complimented on stuff like, "Oh, look at your eyes! I have never seen eyes so /blue/, omg!", meanwhile, I'm sitting here like, yeah? Do you want them? Here, let's trade, now leave me alone. Because what they're saying is so empty. I got a haircut recently. I've always worn it short, just past my shoulders at the longest, back when I was still trying to grow it out, but not I had my mum chop it all of. Then people compliment the new pixy cut (which is more of a boys cut, but gendering haircuts is bull**** so...) and all that.

When I was little, I was LITTLE. I was thin, /maybe/ a little tall for my age, but certainly lighter than just about anyone else. So, I was called cute. I did have the so-adored big blue eyes, after all. Bleach out my already pretty light hair and I was the perfect little princess. On top of that, I was 'gifted'.

Now let me tell you a thing (sorry I'm ranting on your rant), but 'gifted' kids? THEY ARN'T F***ING SPECIAL. We just learn things in a different order than other kids. So while most little six-year-olds brains are wired to learn basic social skills and all that fundamental, 'I'm not a s***ier person I swear' stuff, we the gifted were learning how to multiply, and read above out grade level, and be deep-as-hell when we wanted to be. And THEN, when we finish the academic phase of our development and our little dysfunctional brains say 'okay kid, let's learn social cues', there's no one left to teach us. So, yeah, 'gifted' kids were screwed over, and we get complimented for it, over and over and over, but there's NOTHING else we get from that except a life of mental issues and social dysfunction.

So, I'm a not-bad-looking smart kid, in knowledge bowl, who is literally writing a book FOR school, has written a comic and is working on another one, and who only ever gets compliments on my gods-danmed eyes, while the exact same people giving me said compliments, also proceed to mock me via my first name, which isn't bad on its own, until someone decided to give me a nickname (If anyone calls me by my old nickname they get their throat ripped out, figuratively. Maybe.)

Quick question, is it a compliment to be told you're 'scary' by one person, then '/adorable/' by another? Because I don't know who's lying.

But I am glad to report that the last guy who had a crush on me was crushed by me. His ego, anyway. It was the cutest little thing and I just /stepped/ on it.

Like you said (trying to tie back into your original point and struggling here), beauty is bull****. Take it from yourself, as someone who claims not to have it, and take it from me, someone who's told that I have some. Why should a girls worth be tied to something so rare and so fleeting? "Because f*** you, that's why" Ah, what poetry from the collective mouth of society. Please excuse me while I get my matches and gasoline, what was that? Why? Oh society, what a stupid little thing you are. See you in hell.

Sorry for ranting on your rant, but I get going, then I keep going. Suddenly there are more words than- Nope. I'm stopping now.

Bye bye now.

LakeOfCancer says...

ohmylord.....this was the funniest thing I've ever seen someone say on my works! xD

But like, people will say all this crap that they expect to make me happy and all, but like, i'm sorry, have you seen me? I'm not pretty, nor am i cute, nor am i anything else you wanna call me. I have nothing to make me pretty or anything. And honestly, who cares if you rant on my rant. It's why it's called a rant, if someone wants to respond with a rant, then they should do it.

I'm glad you were amused. (that might sound sarcastic or condescending or something, but it's not, I promise)

Act in the valley so that you need not fear those who stand on the hill.
— Danish proverb