Published January 27, 2006
Our story isn't over,
It's just commercial break.
Wherever I go-
Your love with me I'll take.
Our life together isn't over,
And it will never end-
Let me know you miss me,
And my love to you I'll send-
Our story isn't over-
And this I promise you,
Our story isn't over-
It's just...
to
be
continued....
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141,368 Literary Works • 674,383 Reviews
Nice! I really liked this one, great flow
This poem was amazing! One of my favorites! But I think it would be a lot better with Nicole Lynn's punctuation edits. It makes it seem more...real.
Great job. Really sweet. Nice Message.
If there was more punctuation it would have been a little easier to understand. For example:
"Our story isn’t over-
It’s just a commercial break.
Wherever I go-
Your love with me…I’ll take"
Just adding in the ‘-’ pauses makes it known that there should a pause or a breathe. That way you’re not reading all at once it gives the reader time to register what you’re trying to say. I really liked this, too. It was sweet.
I like this one. One minor issue: "Wherever that I go" perhaps that should just be "Wherever I go"?
Excellent poem though. I especially liked: "Our story isn't over,
It's just...
to
be
continued...."