Published July 2, 2011
Another project for school. I think the message may have been a tad underdeveloped, but there are some parts I like. Feel free to be harsh! 
In common days or special times, the way may not be clear,
But now I say with many rhymes to listen and you’ll hear.
The path is right in front of you. The bread is on the table
It’s what you surely want to do. It’s something you are able.
When given tasks that make one sore, it often leads to stress,
From quoting Ravens, “Nevermore”, to reading Hermann Hesse.
With lots to do and not much time, it’s easy to feel hurried.
With homework stacked up miles high, one can’t help but worry.
There’s no need to diagnose the ending of one’s rope.
But happiness is very close, so do not give up hope.
The answer now rests in your hands, (it’s nearer than you think)
A counter to the harsh demands that lead one to the brink.
So now’s the time, without ado, my solution to your stress:
Without a trace of rest for you, the work is meaningless.
So read a book or just unwind. Your mood will soon improve.
After this, you might just find your stress has been removed.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
138,206 Literary Works • 672,082 Reviews
I love the rhyme. It really unwinded me after reading it. I love the rhyme scheme and it reminded me of Poe's rhymes. That made me happy since I barely see that rhyme and the fact that it flowed well with it.
However, I think that the ending makes it feel a bit incomplete. I would add more of a definite ending to it. There was no big bang that let me know that it was finished. I wouldn't elaborate. Just one or two more lines will do it. Or just edit the pre existing lines.
Anyway, it's very enjoyable and a nice read. Ciao.
-Nana
I love this! Do you want to know a secret? You seriously removed my stress with this poem! The rhythm and rhyme are just so unwinding and kept constant. Nice work!
Keep writing!
Haha, this is great. An excellent read and I sincerely enjoyed it. Only one part is choppy, which makes the rythym go off beat.
It's quick to go back though, which is excellent. Pretty good overall, watch your spelling and word usage and keep up the great work.