Published July 24, 2011
The way to get girls
Sigh and stutter when she’s there,
gaze at moonlight, grasp at air;
talk of love all night and day,
think of pretty things to say.
Tell her things you do not mean
of beauties she has never seen;
all of which you must declare,
to her grace has no compare.
Flatter her until she sighs,
declare that she is your demise;
tell her she’s the only one,
without her, all the light is gone.
Speak of love that lasts forever,
vow that you will never leave her.
flatter her until she sighs,
pause a bit, then tell more lies.
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138,251 Literary Works • 672,090 Reviews
This is so true. I enjoyed this poem quite a bit. The rhyming certainly allowed the poem to flow nicely. I'd change the title of the piece to perhaps a more delicate phrase, such as "How To Capture Her Heart", or something along those lines. Also be sure to capitalize new phrases within the poem. All in all, a great piece!
It was a nice one. Full of truth, because that's what almost all boys do. Just one thing I'd like to point out.
'one' and 'gone' don't really sound proper. So maybe that can be edited. Otherwise, nice work!I love this little poem.
I would change this to
The exclamation point is a little over-the-top and I think a period would do. For some reason I'm really against exclamation points in poetry unless they're absolutely necessary, like when someone is shouting.
Besides that little nitpick, I don't actually like the title. I think "how to get girls" might be more straightforward. But even that doesn't explain what you are outlining in this poem.Something more like "How to make girls fall in love with you" but that's too long as well. I'm useless at titles but I would suggest changing yours.
Things I adored about this poem
Best ending ever. Keep up the poem-ing.
This poem made me smile...how unfortunately true this is:)
should probably be "have" instead of "hasJust a few little nit picks:
to make it flow better, I would suggest adding another sylable, perhaps "all the light is gone"
Otherwise, a beautiful and well written piece