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Young Writers Society



Jarkuu

by KiteRide86


So Epic poetry is more fantasy than anything.
(I.E. Beowulf) But this is just a little ditty I wrote for my British Lit class.

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Dree was a virtuous man,
Kind in deed, and brave in spirit,
His triumphs known across the land.
In his twenty-first year, on the fifth day of spring,
There shone an image in the distant void.
Strange and huge, it glided forward,
Seemingly buoyant and graceful.
As the figure drew close to Jarkuu,
Its form became identifiable to the naked eye.
‘Twas a beast of grand proportion,
With eyes of ruby and ivory teeth like daggers.
The air amidst the city grew hot as it proceeded forth.
King Edan, distressing, summoned his army against the monstrosity.
Bows at the ready, target in range,
The signal was given and the arrows soared in line for the beast.
The beast scoffed as the arrows fell to the ground,
None reaching him.

Lifting his head, he roared a deep bellow,
Causing the earth to tremble.
Then shouted:
“I am come on behalf of the Eastern Klan,
Strong among nations and wise among men.”
The king, being perplexed, sent for his son, Dree.
As he explained the situation, Dree felt his fear.
Being baffled, as well, Dree
Proposed to infiltrate their camp,
In hopes of discovering the beast’s weakness.
Dree’s proposition delighted the king,
And he was sent off in secret.
Taking the foreign path, Dree slipped
Passed the beast during the bat’s hours.
His journey lasted four days,
Over dry and dusty terrain,
Bringing him to the face of the stone-fortress.
Though colossal and menacing, Dree crept forward.
Scaling the wall, he snuck through the nearest opening.

Quiet and dark, the room held an air of dormant operation.
Dree pressed his ear to the door,
Listening for the thud of footfall.
Hearing silence, he moved down the hall.
Sneaking in and out through unknown labyrinths,
He worked his way searching, for what he was still unsure.
Opening a strange door, he found a, seemingly, abandoned dungeon.
Finding nothing, he turned to leave,
But a voice, quiet as the night, thirsting for life,
Broke through the sound-gap:
“Human, come near, for I am weary.”
Surprised, Dree quickly removed his canteen,
Offering relief to an unseen beggar.
As he moved near the cell, light shone through a barred window,
Revealing a woman of youth, muddled with incarceration.
She inhaled the water like oxygen,
Stopping only to reveal her identity.
“I am called Mina. My city was overtaken by a terrible beast,
As tall as this stronghold
And as cruel as they who confine me.
I was one of many, now I am the last.
Have you come to release me from my suffering?”
Feeling compassion, Dree answered:
“I am come to save my people of the fate yours held.
My intent was too find their weakness,
For the beast has might no human can contend.
But I shall relieve you of this wretched cage,
Once I render this city powerless.”
“Free me now and I will help you,
As I know of their strength.
It lies, not within themselves or the beast.
Nay, they hide a stone, unseen, but widely conversed.
My captors boast often of their fetish, meaning to mock me,
But I have been waiting for this day, patient and hopeful.”
Searching the room, Dree found a set of rusty keys,
Hidden amongst crumpled parchment and small vials.
Praying for their use, he tried the lock.
Success came at the fourth trial.

Taking her by the hand,
They made their way through unoccupied halls and stairways,
Stopping only to avoid detection.
Earlier Dree had noticed a door which seemed unusual,
But too risky to approach.
Now night had reached the castle,
Whispering words of prospect in his ear.
The door lay ahead, unguarded for careless-pride.
Dree opened the door to an unexpected find.
Letting go of Mina’s hand, he patted through light snow.
In the dead center stood a tree of immense height,
Covering Dree’s heart with sorrow,
For there was not one stone, but many,
Hanging like pearly seeds from the branches.

Snow fell around Dree, like ashes from a fire.
Gathering his strength, he grabbed the lowest branch and began his ascent.
One by one, he picked stones and watched them shatter loudly,
As they slipped from his hands.
Men rushed in from the back doors, swords in hand.
Dree, realizing that Mina was unarmed,
Dropped his weapon.
Mina groped for the sword, through the snow.

Raising the extractor of blood, she resisted her attackers.
As the last pearl smashed against the ground,
Dree raced down the tree and drew his fighting knives.
Seeing no end to the onslaught,
Dree proclaimed:
“Leave me to fight off the demons.
You had no obligations to me,
But to aid me in my search.
That you have done,
Now you must aid yourself.
You have seen more suffering than most.
So I release you,
Go where you wish.”
“I have no safe place now,
My wish is to see you back to your people.”
The selflessness Mina showed him
Enhanced his stamina and together they fought through the dark,
Chopping down all the men in their path.
As the day woke, they saw to the destruction of a nation
And the end of suffering, for when they arrived in Jarkuu
They saw the great beast in pieces amidst a celebratory crowd.


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Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:59 pm
Emerson wrote a review...



The only epics I've read are parts of The Odyssey that school requires and The Metamorphoses by Ovid. So I'm not too learned in them. This is a good idea, but it seemed hard to read for me in places. The story got confusing and the lines were just bland telling. Also your stanzas were really long. Some of the stanzas in The Metamorphosis a long, too, but no matter what I can understand it. Maybe I'm just rambling! Either way, you might want to go through and try to make some of your lines better, or tell the story clearer.





It's a pity the dictionary has only one definition of beauty. In my world, there are 7.9 billion types of it- all different and still beautiful.
— anne27