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The bonding I long for...

by Kem6o

You say you want this, you say you want that

You say you want to go here, you say you want to go there

You say you want your fantasies fulfilled, you say you want to show me as a trophy

Many things you wanted but got denial on the face of it, Oh my Madho if only you would have let me love you the way I wanted to...

I wanted to ruffle your hair, I wanted to share that shy smile in that thundering air

I wanted to talk my soul with you

I wanted you to visit the places my heart has gone to

I wanted to drink you from a distance 

I wanted to maintain a barrier

I wanted things to be fun

I wanted to keep secrects

I wanted to playfully strike you and run away

I wanted to play, dance, sing

I wanted time.

time time time

that's what you didn't have, I think

I wanted to build us a world but I needed your help

Rushing matters don't gratify my gut and I try to stop, you, me, us, all

and it does beautifully come to an unfathomable end

pure sickness, pure hurt, pure wince, not imaginable pain

Oh my, what did I ask for that demanded so much suffering

Oh my, what else could I have done

Being me this is it

At least you aren't suffereing like me

At least you are free unlike me...

Is this a review?



User avatar
10 Reviews

Points: 280
Reviews: 10

Fri Jun 07, 2024 9:25 am
Lolita18 wrote a review...

Hello, here for a quick review.

such a wonderful poem you have written. this makes me visualize a couple where they both are present physically but only one of them is present wholly in the relationship. and they also know that.
they are aware of their attachment towards their partner and how much it will hurt breaking apart but the thing that hurts more is the fact that the other person wont be that much affected. they will surely move on fast.

you wanted to experience so many things with your loved one, but clearly the other person is not interested. and it hurts so much.

You say you want your fantasies fulfilled, you say you want to show me as a trophy

these lines, they only care about their own things. they don't see you as a person but rather as a 'show off' to flex about, like they think you exist without any feelings.

I wanted time.

time time time

that's what you didn't have

sometimes, all we want, what we need is time only but we never get it.

At least you aren't suffering like me

At least you are free unlike me...

these lines are so beautiful. this shows that when they finally ends their relationship. they realise how much they cared and the how much the other person did not.

so, at last i would say i really liked this work

have fun writing~

Kem6o says...

Thanks a lot for reviewing it, it means a lot!

Lolita18 says...

you're welcome %uD83D%uDE0A . it's a beautiful poem indeed.

User avatar
97 Reviews

Points: 8739
Reviews: 97

Tue May 21, 2024 5:01 am
Moonlily wrote a review...

Hello Hello, I hope you dont mind me popping in with a quick review. I will apologize If this is a lot shorter than my normal ones. Overall I really liked this and it is a message that would hit home to a lot of people. Romance is rough and confusing and sometimes waiting works or it doesn't. I wish you luck don't worry you will find someone out there that matches your pace.

Now I do want to point out some typos quickly that are an easy fix. "I wanted to keep secrects " I think you mean " I wanted to keep secrets" There's also this typo." At least you aren't suffereing like me" I would change that to " At least you aren't suffering like me."

Dont worry typos happen to the best of us keep writing and drink water!

Kem6o says...

I don't mind it at all, instead I thank you for reviewing my work! Also thanks for your good wishes.

Random avatar

Points: 200
Reviews: 0

Mon May 20, 2024 3:58 pm
mariapositiva says...

I loved it... You really got a talent.

Kem6o says...

Hey, Thankyou!

User avatar
9 Reviews

Points: 148
Reviews: 9

Sun May 19, 2024 8:37 pm
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AmberMelanie wrote a review...

I really love this poem you wrote. I think a lot of people can relate to this one especially. Relationships are confusing...I appreciate that you put "I wanted to maintain a barrier," and then "I wanted things to be fun." How do you even know how to sort these emotions at once?! I think this poem is really creative. The second half is less abstract and more direct; ("...and it does beautifully come to an unfathomable end.") Wow! This poem is really, really deep. The end; "At least you aren't suffering like me...At least you are free unlike me..."
Wow, you have done a lot of great work with this poem! I hope I can be a better writer by reading this.

Kem6o says...

Hey, thankyou for this valuable review. This is the first time I have posted something online and I have got such a motivating feedback. I am grateful. Hope to see you around!

I don't have much knowledge about marsupials.
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