Young Writers Society

I love it the symbolism used in this work is amazing I think it describes when a kid is young he looks up and sees hope in the night sky then when he is grown his child and him look up and he is shocked to realize there is no stars which could represent the loss of hope humanity feels in the future.I like the lines.
Time passed with shocking swiftness. The boy quickly became a man, and not long after had a boy of his own. One Christmas eve, after a filling Noche Buena, the man took his boy to the rooftop of his house. There, they sat on chairs and talked for hours.

"Anak, when you grow up, I want you to be the like Polaris, the brightest star in the sky. It always stays in place, and there it shines the brightest among the stars. You see, anak, Polaris is the star that-"

"Dad," the son interrupted, "what are you talking about? What's a star? What's a Polaris? Aren't these just old things that exist in fables?"

The man was shocked when he had heard this, for when he looked up, he saw no stars, no Polaris that shone brightly in the night sky.

There was just absolute silence, and perpetual darkness wherever he looked
Good job.

Since it's review day, I'm here to review!

Woah, that's all I have to say at first. I like the concept, where the stars have all disappeared. Have they burned out? Has pollution become too thick for us to see them? I want to know.

That said, your sentences at the beginning were all very long and felt kind of monotonous for me. And, if the man was growing up, shouldn't he have noticed that the stars were disappearing before that moment with his son? I don't know, maybe my opinion here is a minority.

Since this work is very short, there's not much else to nitpick. Overall, I liked the story.

Keep writing!
-Grace

Hey outvaders,

First Impressions: Definitely fits in the short story genre It was an interesting concept, so I enjoyed the read.

Positives: You've got a cool plot that flows well with the "informative" feel, which also is okay because of the fact that it's so short. Any longer and your reader would feel like they were reading a "...for dummies" book, rather than a story to their kids.

I liked the contrast between the first scene with the father and the son and the second, as it was just like a direct translation, only on the opposite side. It was an interesting plot twist, of course, when the entire world has flipped upside down, and we really quickly grasp that it's a big thing.

Negatives:

They lay on a patch of grass not so far from the statue and there, under the light of the stars, they talked for hours.

Hello! Holden Caulfield here with a review. Now, I do not know if I quite understand the overall meaning of the story, but, as a concept, I found it interesting. I liked what I interpreted to be religious symbolism.

My main problem with the piece is the grammar.

in a time where there were still stars in Manila's night sky

Christmas at the Rizal Park

Papa Jesus

To the people who see this (and to those who don't), have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! Apologies for being late to the party.

*I can't really post these little author's notes at the end of the work, or else it'll ruin the flashfic vibe.*

Interesting facts, just thought I would share: The Chinese considered the Pole Star as “the great honorable Lord of the Heavens.” In a relevant position in the natal chart it gives spiritual powers to the nearer, who will be highly respected. The Pole Star serves as a guide and indicator. If it is conjunction planets in the angles, the native will have a good sense of discretion and is able to follow his or her instincts. The native clearly recognizes his or her aims, and will pursue and achieve them. [3]

Polaris, α Ursa Minoris, the Pole Star, is not as bright as we may think, It is still east to find by following up a line through the lower and upper stars at the end of the pan part of the Dipper. Ptolemy gives it Saturn-Venus rating, entirely right for the star which serves so well to guide us in our wanderings, and that is just what it tells us about people when we find it strong on their horoscopes. According to its aspects, they are excellent or not so good at receiving and giving guidance, but give it they always will, and to any and all who will listen. [4]

Polaris rules the pancreas in the human body. [5]