Andrew here with a snappy review! This is a good calm after meeting the aliens and does a good job to let us see our characters interact with each other. I really like the way each chapter switches the perspectives and gives us a really interesting look into this story from multiple similar, yet definitely distinct, angles.
It was the kind of thing that everyone had dreamed about but this was getting a lot closer to the real deal
This is a super interesting idea, but I think it's clunkily said here.
"Penny for your thoughts?" she asked, keeping her voice low so that she didn't accidentally startle him.
Another phrase I'm not sure would make sense to or exist in a society which is imprisoned and doesn't seem to have much of a free market.
Her first instinct that day had been to yell at him for acting that rashly but she was proud that he'd thought on his feet like that even when she, the one who was supposed to be in charge of that, mission stood frozen in place.
that comma should be moved in front of the word mission, not be behind it
"Well..," she replied, trailing off," look I'll be honest, I don't think I'll ever believe that we can get away until the day that we actually find ourselves outside this hellhole but with all the effort that mom put and the messages that we delivered ourselves, I think this meeting is going to be a success. That much I can believe."
Glad to see a bit more hope in Aria
Aria located Daisy, who was early once again. That was one definite plus of all the plans centered around escape. Both Harry and Daisy were actually being early for a change.
Hehe
Excited to read the next chapter!
Thanks, and keep writing,
Andrew
Points: 34
Reviews: 178
Donate