Life

Aloha!

How's life treating you? I've also written a poem called "Life", and I'm surprised to find another one. You did a great job at writing this poem, you've buried a very deep emotion in there.

"So, let me ask,

what is the true meaning

of life?"

I love how you ask a question that seems almost a mystery. Your use of words is very precise and your poem leaves the reader deep in thought.


Keep on doing what you do!

-Rose

https://rosewriting12.blogspot.com/

Hello!

I really really like this poem. I love the idea of it, the curiosity. I'm a very curious person so of course, I relate to it.

Your grammar seems spot on to me! Good job with that. Grammar's a jerk

Something I really love about poetry is the mental images that it creates. That's the one piece of advice I have for you with this work. If you want to add some color, add some metaphors and the occasional simile. This poem is already so powerful that I'm getting mental images WITHOUT the extra color, but imagine what it would be like with more? That's just my opinion though, so of course, you don't have to follow it.

I look forward to reading more of your art!

-M

I like the part that says, "Ponder this and all questions left untouched and unnoticed." As if to say, we can only think about it, we can never, truely, answer it. "We want to ask, to question out ways of life." This sticks out, what if were doing life all wrong? That's not just a question, it's a genuine fear. What if this is not my destiny? What if my believes are a lie? It makes for a frighting tought while trying to sleep, as well as an intresting concept. Great peom, I love it. My only critque is maybe the title is a little to simplistic, for a complex poem, or maybe i'm wrong, maybe that fits perfectly, it's hard to say. Maybe you don't want to think life is more complex, when it actually is. Other than that, absolute perfection!

Hello KaiRyu! It's Gymnast2801 here with a review!
This poem was so intriguing with house you started.
"Lift is short"
Simple, quick to the point and it makes you want to read more on why life is short. Very nice job with that!

You have made me wonder more questions about life and why we are out on this world.
I believe that, perhaps it is to help make the world a better place. To add each of our special gift into the world. However, I know that the Catholic version of why we where out in the world is because we where made to know God the Father. So you see, these things are very confusing because there are many philosophies on what the meaning of life is.

Wonderful job with this poem! I didn't really find anything conflicting in the spelling, punctuation or even in the description. Great job!

Keep on writing!

Hey, Kai. Like I said, I am now gonna review your work.

Well done with the job! Writing a poem for the first ever time is tough, dude. You need 100% self-confidence for this or you will be just writing and tearing pages and in the end, you will end up with nothing. But, you made it. You wrote the poem. BRavo!

Now, the main business-

Hmm, the topic is really good. Nice and easy to work on for beginners. And, the title works well, too. Good job!

with every dying moment

with every moment dying

I read this out loud and it was pleasing to hear the words, which were so soft compared to my natural way of speaking. The words themselves were very captivating to my mind. The poem itself is good, but, oh what am I saying, it was more than good.

Very touching for a first time!

Hello!

So first off, great job! Congratulations! You've written your first poem, you've breached a new art. Now that you've gotten your first poem out of the way, you have faced of virtual stage-fright. Writing poems from here on out will be a lot easier, again, congratulations!

Now on to my review.

This poem is quite well worded
The ideas are well thought out
The verses have a lot of meaning
After all, this is what life is about

I like how you cut of some sentences
And continued them in the next verse
I like when poems are written like that,
So keep writing that way, for better or worse.

The meaning of life
Is often pondered on
From theologies to blogs to songs
Until all the meaning is gone

I was interested in reading this
I like the ideas that you portrayed
But through all of this
I feel that there was something you delayed

I feel like you missed some of the feeling
The joy and sadness, calm and pain
The happy times and times of hurt
And if you add those, it'll be to your gain

I really did enjoy this work
I hope this review helped with your writing
And encourages you to never stop
Even if you find this site frightening

And remember now and never forget
Even through your writers block times
To never stop writing
Who cares if it rhymes...

So just rememeber!

Hello!
Let me just say this is beautiful! The subject is very interesting and definitely caught my attention. I'm not exactly awesome with poetry...but i'll try to review to the best of my ability.

Just a tip of advice (not sure if it would work in this poem...), you might want make this into some separate stanzas, but it's not necessary. I mainly split this into a separate stanza:

Life is short

with every dying moment

it grows shorter.

From your first word

to your last

we learn and wonder,

but the most wondered

are left

untouched, unnoticed.