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Aneurohysteria plot (revisited)

by KaeRae88


Aneurohysteria

EDITED: Intro

“In the beginning, two planets collided, and it created the Earth. And the Earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the spirit of the highborn moved upon the face of the waters. And the highborn said, ‘let there be light:’ and there was light.” -the handbook to society.

It's been over 200 years since the disease called Aneurohysteria, also known as Ana, wiped out all the love from the world. When our society was first introduced to the disease, nobody had any idea of its origin or that it would become such a big part of lives.

Ana is known to suppress emotions and thus, leave the people who are affected by this disease more prone to violent behavior. There is a cure for it, but only the rich are able to buy their way to a happy life. They are known as the highborns. However, this leaves most of society to grapple with their desolate lives.

Nearly 15 years ago, two of the first people were found out to be immune to Ana, and they were stuffed in labs to be tested. None of the scientists could understand why only two in the history of 200 years were immune. Just when the scientists were very close to a breakthrough, the two immunes committed suicide.

The story line follows a girl named Leah who is hated at school and at home. She is forced to go to a party that happens once a year for the highborns to show off their wealth and power. It is here she encounters Alex, the charming yet restless highborn who is seeking to escape the suffocating expectations of his royal duties.

Despite their vastly different backgrounds and circumstances, Leah and Alex are drawn to each other in a way they cannot explain. As they spend more time together, a deep and forbidden love blossoms between them, defying the strict societal rules that dictate who they can and cannot be in love because Leah has not been cured. Their secret meetings and stolen moments offer them a brief respite from the oppressive world around them, but the looming consequences of their actions hang heavy in the air.

Meanwhile, whispers of Leah and Alex’s relationship spread like wildfire, leading to unrest among the populace and drawing the attention of those who seek to maintain the status quo of the highborns. They find out what actually happened to the two immunes from 15 years ago and are then viewed as a threat to the fragile balance of power.

They soon find themselves fighting against forces that are determined to keep them apart. As Leah and Alex navigate the treacherous waters of their forbidden romance, they must confront their own inner demons and make difficult choices that will shape the course of their lives. Will they defy the odds and fight for their love, or will the harsh realities of their world tear them apart forever? 


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Stickied -- Fri May 03, 2024 1:36 am
KaeRae88 says...



PS: I know, I am trying to not info dump everything onto you guys. I will create a prologue when I come back to actually getting the chapters written, but I am just trying to get suggestions on how the plot sounds. Let me know please, any review helps!




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Sat May 04, 2024 12:43 am
KateHardy wrote a review...



Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!

First Impression: This was quite an intriguing little tale here. I think you've done a wonderful job of bringing in many interesting elements into the more common idea of a deadly disease and also to the idea of the forbidden romance.

Anyway let's get right to it,

“In the beginning, two planets collided, and it created the Earth. And the Earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the spirit of the highborn moved upon the face of the waters. And the highborn said, ‘let there be light:’ and there was light.” -the handbook to society.

It's been over 200 years since the disease called Aneurohysteria, also known as Ana, wiped out all the love from the world. When our society was first introduced to the disease, nobody had any idea of its origin or that it would become such a big part of lives.

Ana is known to suppress emotions and thus, leave the people who are affected by this disease more prone to violent behavior. There is a cure for it, but only the rich are able to buy their way to a happy life. They are known as the highborns. However, this leaves most of society to grapple with their desolate lives.


Well this is a lovely little start here. Its a nice little foreboding almost history book esque start there just going on about this great tragedy that has befallen this nation and is spreading through it causing so much destruction. Those symptoms certainly sound very fatal and very prone to spreading quite fast.

Nearly 15 years ago, two of the first people were found out to be immune to Ana, and they were stuffed in labs to be tested. None of the scientists could understand why only two in the history of 200 years were immune. Just when the scientists were very close to a breakthrough, the two immunes committed suicide.


Well that is certainly quite the twist there. Normally you have the people who are immune going on some sort of epic quest to try and save the day but this is certainly not something you see all the time. The best part of course is that this is perhaps the most realistic outcome in a scenario like that.

The story line follows a girl named Leah who is hated at school and at home. She is forced to go to a party that happens once a year for the highborns to show off their wealth and power. It is here she encounters Alex, the charming yet restless highborn who is seeking to escape the suffocating expectations of his royal duties.

Despite their vastly different backgrounds and circumstances, Leah and Alex are drawn to each other in a way they cannot explain. As they spend more time together, a deep and forbidden love blossoms between them, defying the strict societal rules that dictate who they can and cannot be in love because Leah has not been cured. Their secret meetings and stolen moments offer them a brief respite from the oppressive world around them, but the looming consequences of their actions hang heavy in the air.


Oooh I was not expecting to see a classic scandalous relationship moment amidst a bit of a zombie apocalypse like scenario that has been set up here but I am certainly not going to be complaining here. Those are often quite fun to run into and this one seems set up quite well.

Meanwhile, whispers of Leah and Alex’s relationship spread like wildfire, leading to unrest among the populace and drawing the attention of those who seek to maintain the status quo of the highborns. They find out what actually happened to the two immunes from 15 years ago and are then viewed as a threat to the fragile balance of power.

They soon find themselves fighting against forces that are determined to keep them apart. As Leah and Alex navigate the treacherous waters of their forbidden romance, they must confront their own inner demons and make difficult choices that will shape the course of their lives. Will they defy the odds and fight for their love, or will the harsh realities of their world tear them apart forever?


ooh taking a proper twist into a genuine love story is not what I was expecting especially given the kind of title this has but I am not complaining. This sounds really intriguing and honestly it seems like it will be a nice fresh perspective on this particular genre.

Aaaaand that's it for this one.

Overall: Overall this seems like a lovely little tale here. I think you've put together a really cool plot right here. I'm looking forward to seeing what this is going to turn out to be.

As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.

Stay Safe
Kate




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Fri May 03, 2024 2:36 am
Moonlily wrote a review...



Hello Hello I hope you dont mind me popping in with a quick Review. Overall moving away from love will help with the asexual and aero-ace issues however I feel must bring up something just in case. Since it numbs feelings and might lead to a risk of violence I would recommend doing research on Anti-social behaviour to not fall into any harmful tropes. Please Keep in mind I am not a part of these groups but if you feel unsure I would recommend sensitivity readers .

Besides that, this is a short but interesting read I feel we got a lot more info. It will be interesting to see how you incorporate this especially with the highborn taking the place of god with that biblical god. ( So I am guessing it's been quite a while since the world we knew fell for that to be wiped and rewritten. Perhaps some do remember in some way. ) The one I feel is missing is the fact you don't really explain what the consequences are something that seems very big. After all, that's what makes this a forbidden romance however you probably know what it is.

All and all I am interested to see how this plays out. Keep writing and Drink water!




KaeRae88 says...


Hey! Again I appreciate your concern and comment. I wonld understand if I was writing this story purely to discriminate that someone would feel offended. However, I am simply developing a plot based on a dream I had (love is a disease) and I am going with the flow. respectfully if you, or any of the readers feel offended, feel free to just skip this post. That is not my intention, and maybe not the correct audience. Offending someone never stopped any authors from developing their plots, and there are always going to be someone who doesn%u2019t like the book. Again, I understand and thank you for the advice!




The Twelve Makeovers of Haircules is the stuff of legend. He defeated the Erymanthian Beard. One could say it was a hair raising adventure.
— KateHardy