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Mrs. Mariwether (Scrpit)

by KaPo21


1. So thing in all caps bolded is a song

2. Things bolded in the center is stuff that happens on stage

3. Things bolded on the right side is exits and enter things

Melody and John are married

Bick is the oldest

Johana is the middle

Tom is the youngest

(OPENS TO AN INSTRUMENTAL SOUND)

SCENE 1 - House Scene 1

(SHE WAKES UP EVERY MORNING)

Melody- John, drink your coffee. You are as cold as snow. It will warm you up.

John- I’m drinking, Melody, I promise.

Melody- Well you better hurry up before your fingers grow numb. And you two eat your eggs or I’ll feed you to the pigs. And no seconds for any of you. Your brother needs some to eat when he comes back from town so you only gets what's on your plate.

Johana- Okay mom. Tom, give me your eggs.

Tom- No, these are my eggs.

Johana- Give me your eggs and I’ll wash all your clothes for a week.

Tom- Done.

John- Both of you hush and finish you eggs. No bartering at the table.

Melody- Then go find something to do.

Johana- Well I’m already done.

Tom- Me too. Johana, look! Bick is home.

(Johana and Tom exit off stage)

(Johana and Tom enter on stage with Bick)

(Johana has her arm on Bick’s arm)

(Tom is pulling Bick’s hand)

Johana- Did you find anything interesting in the town today?

Tom- Yeah. Look, that's where he got that scar.

(Tom points to Bick’s arm)

(Bick pulls his sleeve down)

Johana- Where is that from?

Bick- Correction, Tom, I was just going out for a stroll and that is just a scarp from the woods a few days back.

Tom- I like my scar idea better.

Bick- Well don’t tell mom your story because you will just scare her.

Melody- There you are, come and eat while the food is still warm.

(Bick sits down and starts to fake eat)

John- Anything new in town.

Bick- No, sir.

Melody- Children why don’t you go outside.

(Johana and Tom exit off stage)


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Sat Nov 14, 2020 10:14 am
dramaqueenxg wrote a review...



So I do have a few things to say, yes the format is messy and I do think there are some parts in here that aren't necessary like...

"John- Both of you hush and finish you eggs. No bartering at the table.

Melody- Then go find something to do.

Johana- Well I’m already done."

I just feel like the "then go find something else to do" is just there with no real reason. I just didn't understand but that might just be me. Also where you have the directing notes they're all formatted differently and I think that just makes the page messy and harder to understand because your constantly looking all other the place.

Anyway other than that good job!




KaPo21 says...


DID YOU EVEN READ THE TOP. Obviously not because if you would have you would have understood my formatting. And if you didn't like my formatting then you should have stopped reading. You are supposed to help with grammar and sentences, stuff that I can change. I HAVE ALREADY WRITTEN 26 SCENES AND I AM NOT CHANGING IT BECAUSE YOU CAN READ IT.



KaPo21 says...


Can't



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Thu Nov 05, 2020 10:15 am
omer wrote a review...



Hey KaPo21! I'm here for a review. Let's start!

The format you used here is messy, and probably wastes you too much time on organizing it. It's a bit difficult to read, and can be much easier to understand by formatting all directing notes (including music, enters, exits, physical actions) the same. What I mean by that is that you can align them all to the left, italicize them, remove the all-capital-letters, and it still - if not more - would be a great, understanable script! :)

John- Both of you hush and finish you eggs. No bartering at the table.

Melody- Then go find something to do.

Melody's respones seems a bit out of context for me. Who is she talking to? Why does she say that? Perhaps you could make that more clear?

(Bick sits down and starts to fake eat)

Why does he fake it? Is it a part of the character or the actor on stage?

I wrote my grammar, foramt and punctuation corrections here, you can check it out:
https://omer.writerfeedpad.com/3

You show the relationship between the characters very smoothly, codus on that!

Good job, looking forward for more scenes!!
Hope some of this helps.
Omer.




KaPo21 says...


Okay this was very rude of you to say. If you don't like the way I write then don't judge my work.

Melody is adding on to her husbands sentence because it is something that a married couple might do. You might have known that if you would have read my script instead of complaining about it

Bick can't eat on stage because he will probably have a microphone by his mouth. If he eats with it the noise will go to the speakers and I don't think that people want to hear someone eating.

You only gave one grammatical error while other people wrote at least four. I wanted to post my script on here and I spent a lot of time editing it. I even wrote at the top how the script is formatted. So don't judge the way I format MY work.



omer says...


Hey, I didn%u2019t mean it to come out that way at all. It%u2019s hard to understand the tone of a comment because you can%u2019t see how the person tried to say it. I didn%u2019t mean to complain or judge at all, really, I was just suggesting something, and I didn%u2019t mean to insult you. I%u2019m not that person who writes harsh reviews, and I%u2019m sorry you got that from the way I wrote my review. I read your work twice, and liked it, I just wanted to point some things out and try to help.



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Wed Nov 04, 2020 2:45 pm
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LUNARGIRL wrote a review...



Hello, LUNARGIRL here with a review,
First off your script was really good, you had everything really organized, the formatting must have took forever. If I did that it would have taken me forever.

1. Towards the beginning you wrote,
"John- Both of you hush and finish you eggs. No bartering at the table."
When it should be:
"John- Both of you hush and finish your eggs. No bartering at the table."

2. "Bick- Well don’t tell mom your story because you will just scare her."
When it should be:
"Bick- Well don’t tell Mom your story because you will just scare her."
It should be this because talking about Mom, not "your mom."

3. "John- Anything new in town."
Should be:
"John- Anything new in town?"
He's asking a question, so it should be a question mark not a period.

Overall: There are only a handful of minor errors, and besides that everything was really good.You formatting was very neat and clean, something that would take me a long time to do. It was a really good script, and I can't wait to read what you write next!

Carpe diem,
LUNARGIRL




KaPo21 says...


Hey LUNAGIRL

Thank you so much for your review. It's so nice to be one this website because I would have never caught these erros.



LUNARGIRL says...


Totally agree, this website is awesome.



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Tue Nov 03, 2020 10:04 pm
NastyMajesty wrote a review...



Hello there! Maryah in for a review, nice to meetcha! Okay, so I noticed a few small errors in the script so let me just go over them real quick:
Grows

John- Both of you hush and finish you your eggs. No bartering at the table.

Correction, Tom, I was just going out for a stroll and that is just a scarp from the woods a few days back.

I recommend re-wording this one a bit since it's a bit of a run-on sentence. Try separating them into 2 different sentences. Also, instead of scarp, I'm guessing you meant scar? correct me if I'm wrong lol
Bick- Well don’t tell mom Mom your story because you will just scare her.
This should be capitalized since it's referring to Mom instead of "your mom".
Melody- There you are, come and eat while the food is still warm.
I think it would be better to have a period or an exclamation mark instead of the comma right here.
John- Anything new in town.
Since this is a question, there should be a question mark instead of a period.
Melody- Children why don’t you go outside.
Same issue right here; replace the period with a question mark.
Glows
Overall, this was a really interesting script! The formatting must've been heck to go through and I applaud you for keeping it really consistent (Not gonna lie, I have a huge problem with that :P) Can't wait for the next... uh... part... chapter... scene? Sorry LOL I'm not too familiar with scripts. Anyways, keep writing!
:D




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Tue Nov 03, 2020 8:32 pm
KaPo21 says...



Thank you so much for this review it was really helpful. I hope that you keep coming back when I post more. ❤️❤️❤️





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— alliyah