Young Writers Society

Hello there,

Firstly dear, this isn't art. It's supposed to be posted in your blog, I think.

Okay, so paragraph 1, sentence 3: "Why am I complaining" ought to be followed by a question mark.

Also, sadistic means something entirely different than sad ^_^

Paragraph 3: don't write "Crap like that", that just sounds funny. If this is a blog post thought, everything's fine.

Paragraph four should be one sentence, replace the full stop you put with a coma.

Overall, there's a lot of unnecessary capitalization: the words 'sophomore', 'classes', 'lunch', 'seniors', 'dust', 'why' (after the Why God) do not need to be capitalized.

Finally, you had a few typos in the last sentence of your second paragraph and at the last statement,

You're so smart , Joslyn

Hello Joslyn,

RavenLords here for a review on this fine day.

Wow, last day of tenth grade all ready#FF0000 "> ?

Why am I complaning, the less emotional it is#FF0000 ">, the less I'll have to think about #FF0000 ">saddistic thoughts.

We #FF0000 ">bascially sat around all day doing nothing #FF0000 ">much,

but the rest of the day was spent by attempting to finish records and sit around moping about #FF0000 ">hoe boring our day #FF0000 ">wwas going.

but the rest of the day was spent by attempting to finish records and sit around moping about how boring our day was going.

The Seniors had their last day of school today #FF0000 ">too.

The boys from the two tenth grade division decided to have a soccer game and the girls decided to cheer them on and I thought I might as well join them even though I'm well aware of my severe allergy of Dust and pollen. And of course, the outcome was red eyes, a red nose and a whole lot of sneezing and embarrassment. Why God, Why??

with my friends just joking around#FF0000 ">, trying to act cool in front of the 12th graders.

with my friends just joking around #FF0000 ">and trying to act cool in front of the 12th graders.

Heyl
Nothing much except that you should probably read your stuff a couple of times before posting it. There are many typos and spelling errors, that seem like unintentional.

Keep writing.

-Erin