Chapter 1: The setup
The room wasn’t large. You pay sixty dollars a night you at least want, no maybe not want maybe just expect, expect a room that you can sprawl out in. This was not a room one could sprawl out in, even a person with as few belongings as James LaGrow. His young life prepared him for living in hovels, mansions, and nowhere at all. Grand Junction Colorado officially qualified as the later, in James’ professional opinion. The town had been on his radar for the past few years because of its oil rich land but the state managed to red tap all the business away. James had the features of a Middle Eastern Disney villain so he was built for oils cons but he felt that they had a high risk to payout ratio and so being not worth it. He did though collect rare and hard to find books, the kinds of dusty tomes that one would be more likely to see in an Indian Jones film rather than real life. There were two reasons for this love and fascination with books; first he had recently learned that he possessed an evolutionary propensity towards Magik. James having been brought up as a modern day gypsy did believe in magic there was always an angle and most of the time he saw it. That was until he was approached by name in a bar in Wichita. The better he learn to understand his own mind the easier it is to read others minds. Secondly he was raised to believe that one can never know enough. The bigger the Library the more information at your figure tips, and so if that were true we had set out to create a rebirth of the Library of Alexandra. Due to this or more accurately due to a tip from one of his contacts he found himself checking in to a hotel room in Colorado.
No sooner had he thrown his bags on the bed then phone raddled on its base and began to omit an offbeat ringing. Not expecting a call James waited for a second ring and then answered in a Texan accent not his own.
“Hello,” he spoke quickly into the phone.
“Mr. Richards?” the voice on the line was that of the desk clerk.
He quickly returned his voice to the slow California tone he had used checking in.
“Yeh?”
“Mr. Richards, you have a message that was waiting for you. Sorry I didn’t see it went you checked in.”
“Don’t worry it’s all good. I’ll be right down to grab it.”
“I will have it waiting at the desk for you.”
“thanks.” With that he hung up the phone and was able to breathe a sigh of relief. Most Confidence men were in the business because of the great rush that one gets when they successfully finish a con, but not James for him it was an end to a means. The more money he made the more books he could buy and on the occasion that he found books that “weren’t for sale” he could use his skill set to acquire them through other means. He didn’t unpack his bags but he won’t have even if he were not interrupted anyway. Grabbing his room key he made his way to the lobby once more.
The girl behind the counter was cute, one of those all American girl types. James approached the girl with the kind of walk one would expect from a laid back businessman.
“Here you are sir,” She said handing him a small envelop with his name written on it in Calligraphy, “I apologize again for any inconvenience.”
“Hey, not a problem. Ya know where I can grab a bite around here?”
“Sure, there is a breakfast place just up the street.”
“Thanks.”
As he turned and walked a way he opened the envelop to see a small red piece of paper:
I need you to come by tonight, I think I have found something big. Too big for me.
~Tiffany~
The note was written in the same calligraphy as the envelop its sender was the girl that he was here to meet. It wasn’t just the ominous nature of the note that bothered him it was also the fact that he wasn’t to contact her until the next day. A change of plans is always a bad sign at least that is what he was raised to believe.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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Hey! Caitlin Grant here! I like this story a lot: right from the beginning it makes me want to read more about this main character. You immediately make it clear that not only is this man different from normal people in what he does, but that he's different from the other 'confidence' men as well. That's always something that people find interesting.
there really isn't much for me to say, except that there are a few minor grammar and spelling errors, along with punctuation. but those are tiny details, and other than that this story is really good.