I am in a horribly abusive relationship with
Words.
Although I tend to their every
Whim and devote
Myself
To their eternal satisfaction, they
Refuse to talk to me.
Words will go days and
Weeks without even allowing me to
Think of them.
They play with my emotions day and night.
They are cruel.
Heartless.
Devoid of any empathy for my
Struggle to
Love them.
However, when I have lost all
Hope and resigned myself to sleep for lack of
Thought,
They whisper loving words into my ears and
Fill me with happiness.
But they will soon come to hurt me
Once more.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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125,008 Literary Works • 672,827 Reviews
Hi!
This is a really great and unique idea. What you say is completely true, words can be your greatest enemy and your best friend. I really liked how you said you were in an abusive relationship with words, I feel like that is a very accurate description
I really can't find anything wrong in this, so well done!
Hello!
BrilliantMustaches here...
So, I think your poem could use a little bit of work but it has great potential. It is well thought out and with a little bit more work I think this can be brilliant. I think your wording is spot on but the layout of your poem not so much, I have the same problem. With your layout it gets kind of confusing and it makes the reader read it over and over again to understand, but we want the reader to red it over and over again because they want no, they need more. I really like this poem, I just think it needs a better layout.
-BrilliantMustaches
Hi! Here for your first review!
First off, very unique poem! It has a very relatable theme for writers and readers alike, and is very greatly expressed.
One critique I have is that in one of the line you said "empath". Did you mean "empathy"?
The second one is more of an idea. Just a suggestion that if you wanted you could break this poem into stanzas.
That's really all I have to say! Great job and keep writing!