Essay the First


Hi all! I know it's been a while since I've posted something, but...well...okay, fine, so it's been too long. In fact, if you read closely you'll find a very glaring lie here about that very thing. But let's be quiet about that, shall we? ;D

Anyway, this is the first of eight essays I'm currently writing for the GMS (Gates Millennium Scholarship). I'm not asking you to rewrite it, I just want some opinions.

Please note that I've written it in the style of an essay, not as a piece of creative writing.

Also, a final note: don't be scared away simply because there will be eight of these. If you critique this, I won't demand you remain with me all the way. I'm not stupid like that. :D

Alright, enough stalling. Here it is.

 

 

 

Discuss the subjects in which you excel or have excelled. To what factors do you attribute your success?

 

  I developed a passion for reading and writing in English at an early age, despite having grown up surrounded by people who could not even speak English. 

  Language skills have always been evident in my life. I was speaking coherent sentences before the age of two and I wrote my first story at six. My preteen years were spent reading exhaustively. By the age of twelve I had found an online website (Writers’ Window, now defunct) where young writers converged to read and review each others’ writing. I became active on this site until it closed down in late 2006. Some of my writer friends and I migrated to another site where I remain active to this day (Young Writers’ Society).

  My experiences on both sites confirmed what I already knew: I love writing.

  But one might ask how it all came to be? Why do I enjoy what so many of my contemporaries abhor?

My answer lies in the voracious reading habits mentioned earlier. When I was young I did not have many opportunities to play computer or video games. Not only that, English reading material was very hard to come by in our area. My mother, on work-related trips to Singapore, bought classical English literature. She did not have too much money to spend, so she chose very selectively, only buying what she knew would last us for years.

  Even though many of the books were above my level I read them anyway. I read C.S Lewis’ entire series of The Chronicles of Narnia in a week, and Enid Blyton’s many books, such as The Adventurous Four and The Island of Adventure lasted not long at all. I didn't only read children’s books, though, and it was with equal eagerness that I figuratively devoured the works of Dickens, Haggard, Verne and Kipling. I read Don QuixoteThe Lord of the Rings, and even Iliad. On average I read five books a week.

  One would assume that my rapacious wont of  reading would eventually be satiated. Not so, and even to this day I continue to read as much as I can. I have since expanded my circle of interest and, through the internet, managed to gain access to such popular teens’ series such as Harry PotterThe Hunger Games, and Eragon(A.N: Please, bear with me, I'm writing this for adults to read)

  I absorbed words like a dry sponge in water. The ideas, beliefs and passions of the writers’ permeated my mind, affecting the core of who I was. Inevitably, I could not remain quiet with such a storm of input. I wrote short stories and novels, stretching the limits of my imagination and creativity.

  Over the month of November in 2010, I joined over 200,000 other writers in completing the annual NaNoWriMo, a personal competition to write a 50,000 word novel in thirty days. It was my first experience with writing on a deadline. Needless to say, I was not completely prepared for the mental strain that clamped down on me. I was learning how it was like to be a real writer.

 

Another subject in which I have accomplished much is art. It was largely a self-taught subject, and one that I am immensely proud of.

  It started, as it always does, with crayons and coloring books. Very quickly, though, I outgrew that and progressed to other, more sophisticated mediums. Over the years I have made leaps and bounds through the study of art. I have explored such tools as ink quills, brushes and felt-tip pens. I have painted with oil, acrylic and watercolor. I even tried my hand at sculpturing when my father bought me some air-dry clay from America.

  The novelty of creating a scene in which everything within was a product of my imagination enchanted me. I enjoy neatness, simplicity and symmetry in life, and it was on the easel that I was able to freely craft this.

  Did I say freely? Perhaps I was not as free as I should have liked. I could not teach myself everything, and I was frustrated at the many times I could not clearly put onto paper what I imagined in my mind.

That is where I turned to the internet. Like so many of my others interests, the internet was ready and able to supply my need of information. I became a member of Deviant Art, a site where many talented young artists (and professional veterans!) displayed their portfolios. 

Something I loved very much was the atmosphere of the site; so full of creativity and helpfulness. One of the greatest points of Deviant Art is the numerous tutorials on various art mediums. No matter what kind of struggle I was going through, be it a pencil drawing, an ink line-art or a watercolor landscape, Deviant Art had an experienced tutor who had already triumphed through my exact predicaments. I grew as an artist with Deviant Art, a debt I will never forget.

An additional tutor in my artist’s life was my father. My father is a full-blooded Thai native, and as a child, he was given a rare opportunity to move to America. While there, he became employed as a ceramics painter, capturing such images as Alaskan animals and scenery on mugs and plates. The skills he acquired in that job remained with him for the rest of his life. Much of what I know about perspective and anatomy came from him.

 

The subjects in which believe I excel are writing and art. I came about writing through reading, and I came about art through my love of creating. I believe these are two things that can be combined very effectively, such as through the art of calligraphy, or through book illustrations.

Someday, I hope to bring my interests together effectively and skillfully, creating masterpieces enjoyable and enlightening to all.

Comments & reviews · 2
Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.

Howdy!

I'm going to review your work. :)

I developed a passion for reading and writing in English at an early age, despite having grown up surrounded by people who could not even speak English.

There doesn't need to be a comma in this sentence, it doesn't make sense with it there.

I read C.S Lewis’ entire series ofThe Chronicles of Narniain a week, and Enid Blyton’s many books, such asThe Adventurous FourandThe Island of Adventurelasted not long at all.

Be careful of your spacing here and your phrasing. 'not long at all' does not make sense. You could say 'didn't last very long'.

I readDon Quixote,The Lord of the Rings, and evenIliad. On average I read five books a week.

Be careful again with spacing

One would assume that my rapacious wont of reading would eventually be satiated.

The word 'wont' does not make sense here.

The ideas, beliefs and passions of the writers’ permeated my mind, affecting the core of who I was.

There needs to be a comma after beliefs.

Very quickly, though, I outgrew that and progressed to other, more sophisticated mediums.

There doesn't need to be a comma between 'quickly' and 'though'..

The subjects in which believe I excel are writing and art.

You need an 'I' between 'which' and 'believe'.

I must say that this is such a beautiful piece. This is indeed inspiring. The amount you've read throughout your life so far is surely reflected in your works. :)

Ok, I had some free time, and I just wanted to say a few things. The format makes it a little hard to pick out the start of a new paragraph. Some have no indentation, and those that do have, the indentation's a little too small, I think.

In particular, I found this sentence a little awkward to read: "...through the internet, managed to gain access to such popular teens’ series such as..." It seems a little off somehow.


You need an "I" between "which" and "believe" in the sentence: "The subjects in which believe I excel are writing and art."

Best of luck on the scholarship! :D



Everyone you will ever meet knows something you don't.
— Bill Nye