We will never understand why life happens… life itself.
We will never understand why the wind blows one way instead of the other.
We will never know why the heart beats in pursuit of something that seems unfathomable.
Instead of being pessimistic towards this great perhaps placed in our lives, let’s embrace it.
Let’s grab it by the fingertips and never let it go.
Let’s hold on and sway under the wind of opportunity.
Let’s never die. Never regret. Never lose hope. Never disbelieve.
Always believe.
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140,848 Literary Works • 673,694 Reviews
I really enjoy how much informations of life into your poem, in not too much space. I found now spelling errors; or at least when I read it. Normally I read shorter poems then this, and I like the length of this poem.
Some poems have a title that doesn't fit with there poem, although yours fit PERFECTLY. I bet if you keep this up, your poems will improve a lot. Try reading other poems- they'll give you inspiration.
You should keep writing poems because I enjoy reading them, reviewing them, and liking them.
Overall, the poem was great. I don't think you need to improve that much, honestly. As I said before, there were no spelling errors, the punctuation was great, and you capitalized everything that needed to be capitalized.
~ Sunset101
Hello, Jdmiller. I think this is a nice little poem full of many positive, beautiful ideas.
On to the review:
I think poetry is wonderful because you can say so much with so little, so my first bit of advice is to try using as few words as possible to express a single idea. Also, instead of explaining your ideas to the reader, instead let them come to the conclusion themselves by reading your poem. Thrusting your ideas down people's throats isn't as powerful as guiding them toward the conclusion you want. That's why so much poetry uses images and descriptive writing rather than persuasive text. Seeing something beautiful in our minds' eye through poetry can help us realize the positive aspects of life just because it's beautiful - just like stark, harrowing images expressed in poetry can make us feel sadness or despair. Hearing about someone's experience on their path to whatever goal you so desire helps us to look down that path as well. I would suggest trying more images than ideas.
Hope that rambling helps a little. Keep up your writing:)
This is really beautiful, and it has an absolutely beautiful message (that a lot of people here seem to need to hear) It has a nice flow for a free verse poem, and is really inspirational. I especially enjoyed the last two lines: "Let's never die. Never regret. Never lose hope. Never disbelieve. ... Always believe."
Some nitpicks:
1. When you say, "...understand why life happens... life itself." The correct grammatical use of the ellipsis is to have it be, "happens...life" without the space. This is small, and you don't need to worry about it.
2. Personally I think this poem would flow better if you either shortened 'We will' to 'We'll' or lengthened 'Let's' to 'Let us' instead of having a mix of the two.
3. The line "Instead of being pessimistic towards this great perhaps placed in our live, let's embrace it." is a little confusing. This can be fixed up in a blink by just rewording it to something like, "Instead of being pessimistic towards this greatness placed in our lives, let us embrace it." or something similar.
Otherwise I very much enjoyed this poem, would give it seven out of ten stars, and hope to be seeing more from you soon.