I think, I think I might be insane
That's what the voices outside my head say
When I'm visiting graves on birthdays
How? How else am I supposed to cope
With standing knee deep in death
Oh, did you really think this smile was just for show?
Welcome to my chapel
I've tried to keep it clean
Look at all the beautiful walls
And not the crypt below
You'll find all the skeletons
And the things you did not know
Screams are kept behind the glass
And the light is fading fast! Run away!
I know, I know for sure that I am insane
Look at the madman's writing
I'm on the edge of the cliff
I'm trying, I'm trying to ask for help
But I'm too afraid to speak
And I am too afraid to fall
Welcome to my chapel!
I've tried to keep it clean
Look at all the beautiful walls
And not the crypt below
You'll find all the skeletons
And the things you did not know
Paranoia is etched into the walls
And with the shadows come the monsters, run away!
Run, run away, run, run away, run, run-run-run
Don't let the ground pull your feet
Run, run away, run, run away, run, run-run-run
Don't let the chains bind your hands
Run, run away, run, run away, run, run-run-run
Don't let the smoke take your breath
Run, run away, run, run away, run, run-run-run
Don't let the darkness blind you
Run, run away, run, run away, run, run-run-run
The monster's just behind you
Run, run away, run, run away, run, run-run-run
Beware I'm right behind you
Welcome to my chapel!
I've tried to keep it clean
Look at all the beautiful walls
And not the crypt below
You'll find all the skeletons
And the things you did not know
I think you better run now
For once the darkness consumes you
You'll just be another body in the crypt
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140,068 Literary Works • 672,978 Reviews
Hello!
I didn’t think I would find lyrics here, so this is really interesting to me. I really like the chapel and crypt theme, it kind of reminds me of something you’d see from a Tim Burton/Danny Elfman soundtrack, something that would be paired with a tastefully creepy music video. The idea of someone singing about their pristine chapel, ignoring the skeletons underneath, feels like a really cool metaphor for the “skeletons in the closet,” or otherwise hiding a bad part of yourself to keep people close, or even lure them in. Also, talking about this descent into insanity, with the mention of paranoia and a madman’s writing, before ending on that threatening line, really drove home the creep-factor for me. From a songwriting perspective, I can imagine that repetition of “run, run away” with the rhyming lines being an banger part of the song. Maybe a crescendo, if you will.
The only thing I noted for critiques was this one line, where it says “don’t let the chains bound your hands.” To be absolutely fair, I am not a grammar pro, but I think maybe “bind your hands” sounds a little more accurate, because I think “bound” is saying it like it already happened. But again, not a pro (contrariwise, I joined today, so I still have newb status haha).
On a scale of 1-10, I’d honestly give these lyrics a solid 8-9 rating. Pretty great. Nice job.
I like your interpretation of the lyrics, and thank you for your feedback! I did not notice the mistake, and will get it fixed right away haha
Hello! It's me, your music friend, CATS, here to review this poem! Let's see...
Wow...the first paragraph is so amazing! I also love the rhyming, it can totally be a rap or something!
The second paragraph introduces us to his chapel. It tells of how it looks fine, but has things we don't know. Wow. A book cover!
It tells of fear and craziness in the third paragraph. I can relate lol.
Fourth paragraph is the same as the second. I think you meant for this to be a song, right?
OOOO! My favorite part is the middle! It sounds kinda creepy...hehehhe
And then the chapel...
Then the finishing: amazing.
Overall, I think it is really good. Keep writing my friend, and keep making music as well. Happy Writing!
Love,
CATS
Thank you!
No problem! Love your works!