Young Writers Society

Hello there,

I like the optimistic, happy voice that is so present throughout this short piece. There is not a hint of negativity, even when the speaker considers whether she was abandoned by her biological family, and that's kind of refreshing and nice.

I feel like I'd like to see more development of her parents' characters through her eyes. Like, I wonder how they feel when they plant the amaryllis in her room because she stayed out all day looking at it. Are they still just thankful to have any child at all, or are they worried because the child they ended up with is doing something normal children wouldn't? I know the story mentions that her mother planted amaryllis all around, and that also makes me wonder is the mother planting for her daughter or kind of like a thank-you note to whoever/whatever the mother thinks helped these events to occur? How does her father feel?

The other place I think clarification could help would be when you mention "the forest". What forest? The forest outside their house? The forest outside the town? How far away is it? How do the townspeople think about it?

Finally, there was just a bit of grammatical confusion in the last paragraph here:

I say that nature is my other mother, even if it ends up been a random woman that abandoned me. And I genuinely feel that she is connected to me.

Hi Itramsunshine!

This is really cute.

Generally I'm not a fan of works that involve a person who is born special (call me a cynic,) so normally I wouldn't enjoy this kind of story. I'll make an exception for this one. What I really like is how Amaryllis views her unique circumstances with a very humble appreciation. It feels like she uses them to enhance her own life and seek happiness within herself, by walking through the forest and appreciating nature, without trying to separate herself or make herself seem better than others.

I think what I'd like to see is a bit more narrative not focused around Amaryllis. Her Mum and Papa seem like quite interesting people, so I'd like to hear a bit more about their personalities and the way they interact with each other and the world around them.

I particularly like the last paragraph, it sums the piece up quite nicely. Amaryllis talks about her own love of the forest, but also the love of her adoptive parents. Rather than being an outcast, she's a person who finds a way to connect with both worlds, and the last paragraph sums this up really well.

Good work. Keep it up =]

I think this is a very beautiful piece, because it really emphasises the beauty of nature. It also has a twist of mystery, which is also effective. I like how the girl has a strange connection with Nature, but the one thing that's missing is whether her adoptive parents noticed this. Overall, a very good story. (P.S. You write 'God' with a capital 'G', just saying)