If a words meaning changes over time,
Then what has become of the meaning of life,
An answer that was once highly sought for,
Now seeping its way through the cracks in the floor.
Is it to be the best you can be,
A strong and independent individual,
Or becoming one and the same with others,
Blanketing your mind with Sameness's covers?
If a words meaning changes over time,
Then what has become of the meaning of freedom,
An answer that was once thought found,
Now slowly making its way back into the ground.
Is it to be shackled and regulated,
As if becoming an animal's synonymous,
Or is it to be one of the world's greatest mysteries,
Simply remaining anonymous?
Is it not right to say that we have lost true meaning,
In what is life and freedom,
Or should i just remain quiet,
And watch the truth in the hopeful die,
As time quickly begins to fly by.
Is it not right to say that we are blind,
In a world where there are shades of gray,
But all we can ever see is in black and white,
No matter what the wiser one's say?
So what is it then,
What is there left to do,
If you cannot see the difference,
Even if it's standing right in front of you.
Will you take what is being fed to you,
And follow the others behind,
Or will you bite the hand that feeds you,
And decide to finally open your mind?
Hi, Clock!
A great poem with an even better message. Your poem has a good rhyme scheme and a fairly good rhythm as well. The only thing that was unclear was the line 'As if becoming an animal's synonymous'. The line, first of all, is not grammatically correct, and furthermore the meaning of the sentence is unclear. Also, I believe the word 'feed' should be changed to 'fed'. Other than that, a very good poem.
~Pencil
First off, I think this poem really brings up a good question.
Now onto the review.
Some of your rhymes in this are stiff, meaning the word doesn't quite fit with the sentence, but it is there to rhyme, which really makes them stand out like a bit of red in a sea of green. There are two.
In this, I feel like synonymous is forced to rhyme with anonymous because synonymous is typically followed by what something is synonymous with. Being animal's synonym would make more sense, or being synonymous with animal.
This one isn't even really a rhyming problem, aside from the fact that the word is used twice, so it could be counted as an internal rhyme. That being said, I personally would say 'fed' to you, instead of 'feed' to you. This could simply be a typo, might be a dialect difference, but it struck me as odd in the reading.
Last, the rhyme of 'die' and 'by' is rather bland. I feel like I've heard it too many times for it to really call forth that much emotion.
You might want to take a look at the first line of the second stanza. I had to sit there for a moment and consider exactly how that was supposed to be read. Be the best you can be, is a very typical saying, so I wondered if you were making a comment about how those words have even changed, and it was supposed to be separate, or if it was actually being used. Part of this question came form the use of It instead of identifying what it is.
Overall, I think this poem is nice to read out loud, but it seems like it could use some improvements in imagery to help the message sink in deeper. Symbolism is such a powerful device, and you just touch on it with the words sinking into the ground. I would love to see you take that further and just talk about these words like people, as you do with 'Sameness'
Give them bodies, torment them, and morph them so we can see the brutality of this world upon these ideas.
Keep this poem as a conclusion, or an introduction, and make a book out of this. <3