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The Dragons Lullaby

by IntrovertedIcarus


The Dragons Lullaby 

The children were not falling asleep. The witch sighed and asked them what it would take to go to bed. 

A song! A song!" They cried.

"A song..." He sighed. Oh well. He sat the twins on their bed and began to tell of dragons and knights.

"That's not a song!" The young boy cried. The witch sighed, no going deep into backstory. They just wanted a song. Then he remembered a song taught to him long ago.

"Alright," The witch smiled. "Again I say dragons and knight. However not all are rivals." Pulling out his spell book he opens to a page. "This was written by a knight long ago and now is a powerful spell."

"But is it a song?" The young girl inquired.

"Yes, it is a song." Clearing his throat he hummed a soft note and began the spell.

 You’ve nothing to fear,

I’m here my dear.

And I’ll wrap my arms around you.

Warming up my voice to,

Sing a sweet tune.

You’ll find the panic fading,

And your head will stop cascading.

As I kiss you and I say it’s alright.

I will fight away the darkness,

And softly serenade.

For when you're with me,

I guarantee.

I’ll keep you safe tonight.

I’ll keep you safe tonight.

In the moon,

To afternoon,

And everything in between.

So I’ll repay your kindness,

Protecting in the cold.

If may be so bold,

Might I ask another favor?

Because the night is freezing,

And I have started sneezing.

The snow is getting deep,

I’m practically half-asleep.

Can you keep me safe tonight?

Can you keep me safe tonight?


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Points: 175
Reviews: 3

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Thu May 14, 2020 5:43 am
legolas1122 says...



wow it was nice
well it was like a poem but it was nice and good it made me a little sleepy but good job
i liked the part were you wrote
And I have started sneezing.

The snow is getting deep,

I’m practically half-asleep.

Can you keep me safe tonight?

Can you keep me safe tonight?
nice job:)




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418 Reviews


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Sun Feb 23, 2020 2:59 am
Liberty wrote a review...



Hey Icarus!

Hope you're doing well today or tonight. I'm here to give you a review this lovely Review Day and to shove this piece out of the Green Room. ;) Let's get started now~

Alright, so firstly, when you mentioned this was a song in the description box, and then when I actually clicked on the link, and saw the paragraphs bit of it, I admit I felt like reading a song, but my gaze flew to the stanzas, and I was like "okayyy, so it's a short story that turns into a song???" But then I read it and then it made sense. xD

Now, I like the fact that we have this witch (a he? if he's a he, then he would be a wizard. if the witch was a witch, then the witch would be a she) making the kids go to sleep is adorable. The first part, where he starts a story, the kids go "It's not a song! It's not a song!" and it's just. So. Cute. It made me giggle. c:

Alright, and nowww we have the song! :)

There's a very witch-y, craft-y, magic-y feel to it and it's very confusing at first, but as you finish it off... the ties knot and it all makes sense at the end. It's very nice, and it's like a fluffy warm blanket wrapping around you. Then, we have the end of the song—it's great—but if I were to be honest with you, I would have liked it if it gave a little description of the kids falling asleep, and the witch going away or something.

But overall, this was a very nice piece and I enjoyed it! Of course, if you have any questions, feel free to ask me whenever.

And as always...

Keep on writing!

~Liberty

~Happy Review Day~






Thank you for your review! I think I will add a little ending after the song eventually. Additionally male witches do exist as I am one but I understand thinking hes a wizard. We aren't really in media but that is besides the point. Again thank you for the review!



Liberty says...


Ah, I see what you mean about the witch and wizard thing. Your welcome!



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Wed Feb 19, 2020 4:23 am
AndName wrote a review...



Hi!

Okay. The first part of it I was a-reading and I was kind of confused. The kids were like "THIS ISN'T A SONG!" and I was like, "What? This isn't a song" Lol. But then it got into the actual song and it made a lot more sense. As for the story section on top, I take it the witch takes care of them like a grandmother? And then casts a spell on them to sleep, which seems less sinister than I initially thought.

Anyway. The song.

The line, "And your head will stop cascading" Didn't make much sense at first then I thought about it and it made a lot more sense which doesn't make sense! Ha! That's completely unhelpful. Anyway, that line and the one before it makes it seem like the spell was originally meant for luring prey and tricking people into feeling false ease. Along that line, the witch seems like shes repurposing her spell/lullaby. I don't know if I over thought that or what...

The song takes a swift turn towards the gentle after that. She's talking not about her 'prey' but how she's so tired and is asking for safety from them. I think that's a little strange but it's a spell so.

I like your rhyming in this. It's noticeable in a nice way, a song way, and I only have one line to point out.

"Because the night is freezing
And I have started sneezing."

This line made me squint at it a second because it seemed so off from the lullaby quality of it all. They're a bit harsh sounding, the sneezing definitely off putting.

Besides that, I think this flows excellently, the beginning a bit of a confuse (I may have derped :) ) But overall it's great, nothing to sneeze at! :) :) :)


AndName






Thank you! The song is actually about someone close to me. I noticed in your review you used female pronouns for the witch. I swear I made the witch male. I'm glad you like it



AndName says...


Oh goodness. I don't know why I read the spell caster as a she...probably because most spellcasters seem to be she's. So congrats for breaking the mold! And it's cool how you turned someone you actually know into a magical being!




This is a house of homes, a sacred place, by human passion made divinely sweet.
— Alfred Joyce Kilmer