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140,570 Literary Works • 673,474 Reviews
I already critiqued this like a month ago before your mom made you take it off. It's somewhere around here. Sorry In_the_Moonlight but I don't have time to go through it again. I'll try and find my previous critique...
PM when you post something else or you get the next part up (I probably didn't need to write that you would have done it anyway)
P.S. LOVE IT!!!! Finally I get to read your writing that isn't from school. *prances around the room jumping up and down for joy...um no not really. But I am happy that you finally posted this.
This is very very well written!
I love your use of detail and description it is very well done.
I found no major spelling or grammar errors so kudos to you!
You get a gold star!
Let me know if you continue this please
-Carly
No,no. When I talked about the dumpster I meant it was right next to her. I should probably make that more clear. Thanks for the critique and I'll do my best to fix what I can.
Review deleted by request.